Importance of Competetive sport for boys?

[Magic Hans]

I'm throwing this notion out into the open.

Recently I've come across two single parent women whose mid-teen boys suffer quite badly from bullying. One of the similarities is that neither partake in competetive sport. Additionally, the boys were into their arts ... one into music, and another into theatre.

From my own growing up experience at boarding school (which wasn't all good, believe me!), I will now leap to the following conclusion.

I suggest that competetive sport plays a very important role in how boys relate to each other. The popular boys at school were those who played [b]and[/] were good at competitive sport. Other blokes, (not so many) who I've spoken to, concur with this.

Those who weren't popular, were those who didn't play competetive sport. These kids would get picked on. Some were not good at sport, but still played. That willingness let them into the fold.

Some recounts how, from time to time, at the end of the cross country run, (that frankly most hated with a vengeance) the boys would come out of the changing room just to clap home the last chap home.

I'm not saying that 'competetive sport' is right, or that doing competetive sport would eliminate bullying instantly, but that, in practice, it is important.

Any other opinions, or viewpoints or experiences?

[Gav]

I also played competetive sports at school and had similar experiences.
I would say that it's very important indeed that it is available to everyone and that everyone should be encouraged to give it a try, but some are just not suited to it.

I've been coaching kids Rugby and Athletics in recent years and they all get a lot from it, but some try it once and never return because it's just not for them.

On a related note, I do think that children/young adults that get heavily into competetive sport should be made to take up at least one "soft skill" such as art, acting, dancing etc (not that you can't be competetive in those!), just to balance everything out. I think that competetive people who also have non-competetive sports type interests make very well rounded people.

[jivecat]

I think that competetive people who also have non-competetive sports type interests make very well rounded people.

Interesting thread. Sound grim being a bloke!

After some years of PC de-emphasis on anything that smacks of competition in the world of infant teaching (the places are generally run by motherly middle-aged ladies who don't like competition much anyway) we are now being told that to keep boys on board we should reintroduce elements of competition as this really motivates them. Girls are apparently motivated by cooperation and caring for others and this is why girls are often more successful at school as these are key values in most classrooms.

The arguments for limiting competitiveness in PE for young people seem pretty convincing but I still think there's a place for it in promoting excellence, though at the expense of the mediocre majority.

Like the previous posters I loathed team games as a teenager and still do - wild horses wouldn't persuade me to take part, and believe me, some people have tried to make me, fairly forcefully. And recently I have met someone (male) who assured me that team spirit, as manifested in team games participation, is the benchmark of an integrated, effective adult. I thought he was nuts, quite frankly. (But then, I would say that, wouldn't I?) What do other people think?

[Magic Hans]

...
On a related note, I do think that children/young adults that get heavily into competetive sport should be made to take up at least one "soft skill" such as art, acting, dancing etc (not that you can't be competetive in those!), just to balance everything out. I think that competetive people who also have non-competetive sports type interests make very well rounded people.

Good point Gav, and one that I could easily have overlooked.

I guess my big fear is that some single parent women might easily misunderstand the competetive sport in a young boys growing up, where they might be more likely to appreciate the 'softer' side

[Beowulf]

I was bullied a lot at school. I was a sickly kid and as such I never took part in any sports activities. But I don't think it was just me doing or not doing sports that made them pick on me.

Like all animals males like to be top dog.. alpha male. They'll pick on those weaker than themselves to make them look good and assert their dominance. Basically my experience is if you show any chink in your armour or any sign of weakness then you'll make yourself a target for bullies.

And by weakness I mean being fat, thin, small, tall, rich, poor etc anything at all that marks you as being different.. Even if that's something as silly as wearing the wrong brand of trainers.

[MartinHarper]

Bullying is a mechanism to enforce conformity. Where competitive sport is the norm, then those who do not partake will get bullied. Where joyriding is the norm, then those who do not partake will get bullied.

Joyriding is an excellent way of giving children a chance to acquire driving skills at an early age, and I think it should be promoted on its own merits, rather than as a way to combat bullying.