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Thread: Men making noises

  1. #1
    Little Miss Jazz Shoes Jazz_Shoes (Ash)'s Avatar
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    Angry Men making noises

    (Thought that might get your attention)
    Ok, I have got to say that I am soooo sick of men that make noises when they lead a move and I (the follower) can't follow it or misinterpret the signal. What is wrong with just carrying on with the dance? It doesn't seem to bother anyone else, when I lead and I lead something wrong it doesn't bother me! It ruins what could be a perfectly good dance, instead I feel like it is getting blamed on me for not following it properly.
    Maybe the title of this thread should be 'People' not 'men' but i've never danced with a woman leading and her taking it so serious.

    Ok, that was just a rant, but I am allowed to rant if I want

    From Ash, pissed off little forumite, grrrrr

  2. #2
    Registered User Beowulf's Avatar
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    Re: Men making noises

    define "noises"?

    I make noises.. but my noises are usually "Ooops sorry I did that wrong!"

  3. #3
    Little Miss Jazz Shoes Jazz_Shoes (Ash)'s Avatar
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    Re: Men making noises

    Quote Originally Posted by Beowulf1970
    define "noises"?

    I make noises.. but my noises are usually "Ooops sorry I did that wrong!"
    More knida like 'ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh'. Oops is fine as long as you are not being deadly serious.

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    Re: Men making noises

    I try to avoid reading too much into what my partner says/scats/emotes. It's easy to over-analyse things and sabotage my own enjoyment of the dance, without really achieving anything positive.

    Communication is like dancing. If you discern a five page essay from "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh", you may be guilty of a little anticipation.

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    Registered User Feelingpink's Avatar
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    Re: Men making noises

    Quote Originally Posted by Jazz_Shoes (Ash)
    More knida like 'ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh'. Oops is fine as long as you are not being deadly serious.
    Not tutting? Men are very good at that ... as well as the long breath of disapproval as the air is sucked between their front teeth. Women just don't seem to have the same ability in this area (perhaps we don't practise it??? ) Is it the same kind of noise as a chap might make after raising the bonnet on a broken motor vehicle? A woman (when observing mistakes in her dance partner) would be more likely to raise her eyebrows and go into a hard Paddington stare, I would have thought ... either that or hysterical giggling if she's very cruel. And we wonder why there are sometimes too many women in MJ....

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    Registered User Freya's Avatar
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    Re: Men making noises

    Quote Originally Posted by Feelingpink
    Not tutting? Men are very good at that ... as well as the long breath of disapproval as the air is sucked between their front teeth.
    I hate this It always makes me think that I've done something Wrong! But I have had one guy do this then go Apologise! His Tutting was at himself not at me so now I try not to take it so seriously! Although Paranoia often gets the better of me! It's not always the leads fault!!!

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    Re: Men making noises

    But but but.

    Surely it's a male led dance. If it goes wrong, it's the mans fault?

    This can cause real trouble. It's happened to a friend of mine and it knocked her confidence so much she went home for the night. And that was from one "sound" in one dance. I'd just avoid dancing with them again. Or, dance with them and make sure you tut right back at him when i goes wrong. Or tut when it goes right and have an "is that the best you can do" look on your face so stress him out a bit.

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    Registered User Freya's Avatar
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    Re: Men making noises

    Quote Originally Posted by Mostlysane
    But but but.

    Surely it's a male led dance. If it goes wrong, it's the mans fault?

    This can cause real trouble. It's happened to a friend of mine and it knocked her confidence so much she went home for the night. And that was from one "sound" in one dance. I'd just avoid dancing with them again. Or, dance with them and make sure you tut right back at him when i goes wrong. Or tut when it goes right and have an "is that the best you can do" look on your face so stress him out a bit.
    And "Knock his confidence!" It works both ways! And We're all learning!!!

  9. #9

    Re: Men making noises

    Ooh Ash, good topic!

    I stuff up lots so I'm not going to even try and blame the men. (How could so many men be wrong? It HAS to be me!). Usually it's no big deal and we keep on dancing and at the end they'll teach me what it was I was meant to do.....but if I stuff up with my HUSBAND he has the biggest hissy fit ever!!

    Maybe men make noises with women they know well?

  10. #10
    The Forum Legend
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    Re: Men making noises

    I'm sure that this works both ways.... I've definitely seen women giving guys a hard time when they lead a move badly.

    Anyhow, isn't MJ a 'blame-free' culture. I never particularly worry if something I attempt goes wrongly. I might try to lead it again a little while later, and see if I can lead it better. Or I'll just forget about it.

    I do say to beginners that it is always the mans fault. If they don't follow, it's because I didn't lead it well enough, or led a move that was inappropriate to do with them. But I do also then say that who cares anyhow. It's just about having fun, and if something goes wrong, then just smile, forget about it, and carry on.

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    Re: Men making noises

    Quote Originally Posted by Mostlysane
    It's happened to a friend of mine and it knocked her confidence so much she went home for the night. And that was from one "sound" in one dance.
    Well on the plus side, that's an easy fix any time there are too many women at an event. Just wait till she's dancing and say "ahhh". Just don't sneeze. It might knock her confidence in her respiratory system.

  12. #12
    Teacher Paul F's Avatar
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    Re: Men making noises

    I like to make noises akin to a tennis player for each move

  13. #13
    Registered User stewart38's Avatar
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    Re: Men making noises

    Quote Originally Posted by Paul F
    I like to make noises akin to a tennis player for each move
    yes the old LOVE 30 is the best

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    Registered User killingtime's Avatar
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    Re: Men making noises

    Quote Originally Posted by Jazz_Shoes (Ash)
    More knida like 'ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh'. Oops is fine as long as you are not being deadly serious.
    Well if the move went wrong they might be panicking about how to get into another move or just continue the dance. I think Beowulf was 'Oops'ing at himself, which might also be what these men were doing. There is a big thing about confidence though and it's easy to take a reaction to moves going wrongly in the wrong way (or I guess the right way depending on why the guy is making the noise).

  15. #15
    Registered User littlewiggle's Avatar
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    Re: Men making noises

    What about the man who always 'rolls his r's' and goes Grrrrrrrrrr!! I always expect him to break into "arriba, arriba"! Don't like it.............!

  16. #16
    Registered User Piglet's Avatar
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    Re: Men making noises

    I don't think this has happened to me for ages *smug Pig!*

    But that's probably because I give as good as I get - have a go at my dancing and I'll point out something wrong with yours - all's fair in love and dancing after all.

    Have a go back Ash - the kind of dancers that try to belittle you aren't worth the 3 or so minutes... you'll find they don't come and seek you out for a dance the same after you've dented their pride

  17. #17
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    Re: Men making noises

    Quote Originally Posted by littlewiggle
    What about the man who always 'rolls his r's' and goes Grrrrrrrrrr!! I always expect him to break into "arriba, arriba"! Don't like it.............!
    Don't know about the Grrrrrrrr's but if your ever dancing in Scotland you'd better expect a lots of rolled r's and c's

  18. #18
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    Re: Men making noises

    Thought I need to have a say on this one - new to this forum, but not to ceroc. I make noises most of the time as a follower and I've never really thought about it til now but I probably put my partners off??

    I whoooo and yeehaa a bit!! I usually sing too and I don't have the best singing voice but when I am making a noise on the dancefloor it means I'm having fun and not taking the dance too seriously. I don't tend to make any noises during the bluesy moves tho - they are far too serious for noise

    Apologies to all I have danced with and pained you with my noise...

  19. #19
    Donna
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    Re: Men making noises

    Quote Originally Posted by Paul F
    I like to make noises akin to a tennis player for each move

    Just remind me to wear ear-plugs next time I dance with you then! I'll start

  20. #20
    TiggsTours
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    Re: Men making noises

    The only noises I don't like men making when we're dancing are the lustful grunts and the "Ooh yeah, baby!" type noises! Ugccchhhhh!!!!! Some men can just leave a girl feeling totally violated! Euch!

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