Unhappy Ladies

[Buttons]

I have been unwell and unable to dance properly for a while now and am only just getting back into the swing of things. My life partner and I still went dancing and I still taxiied. During freestyle, I would sit chatting he would dance his cotton socks off. I missed dancing with him and others big style.

My point is; the other night I was actually feeling well enough to dance. I had two warm up dances with my partner and few dances with others during the begginers 15 min freestyle. He done the class I watched, there was 15 extra women and I was conserving energy for more dances later. after intermediate class He danced for a while and came and got me for a further two dances.

One woman (who knew my situation) came up to me and complained that I had hogged my partner all night and who did I think I was. She stated that I was a taxi dancer and should not be dancing freestyle when there was so many extra women.

I was flabergasted at her cheek and for once stuck for words. I often danced as a leader with this and other women when men are scarce and did not quite know what to say.

Do other folk feel the same as her. Did I really do wrong? I was not taxiing that night and sat out most of the night any way.

[Sheepman]

It's almost hard to believe she was being serious!!

Presumably your partner was also not on duty as a taxi dancer that night? Though if he was, if she had to moan at anyone, it should have been at him.

Greg

[Buttons]

He is not a taxi dancer and she was really serious.

I was really quite miffed, which is why I posted asking if I was in the wrong. Surely I can dance with my partner as much as he/me wants

[Twirly]

Buttons, she sounds rude and selfish. She has some sort of problem, and I'd say don't take it on board - leave it with her. If neither of you were on duty that night as taxi's you have paid your dues (or earnt them by taxiing another night - same thing really) then you are just another punter and can dance with who you like when you like. She was out of order.

I've seen on-duty taxi's dancing with each other in the short freestyle and although I've thought it was a bit off, wouldn't dream of commenting on it.

I do wish that people would keep their noses out of other people's business!

[DavidB]

If you were wearing a Taxi t-shirt, then she might have had a point.
If your partner was wearing a Taxi T-shirt, then she could possibly complain about him.
If (as it sounds) neither of you were wearing Taxi T-shirts, then I would tell her to f*** off and mind her own business. I would do this politely of course - by asking my partner for another dance right in front of her.

When you are off duty, you can dance with whoever you want. I would ask the teacher to remind the class about this.

[LMC]

IMO, she was out of order - particularly in her "expectation" that you should be leading. Even if you are on taxi duty, I would say that your primary "duty" is to the beginner guys, not the beginner women. I actually (nicely) turn down women when I'm on taxi duty "because the guys need all the help they can get"

Four dances in an evening hardly constitutes "hogging" in my book (especially as not all at once). It might be worth pointing out to her that your partner has just as much right to dance with whom he wants as she does to dance with him...

You are definitely not in the wrong.

[stewart38]

We have a women who clearly given the amount of extra ladies seem to be miffed that a Taxi dancer (off duty) dance several dances with her partner (not a taxi dancer)

So much so she complained

We have some ‘solutions’ to the problem

then I would tell her to f*** off and mind her own business. I would do this politely of course - by asking my partner for another dance right in front of her.

When you are off duty, you can dance with whoever you want. I would ask the teacher to remind the class about this.

Buttons, she sounds rude and selfish. She has some sort of problem, I do wish that people would keep their noses out of other people's business!

So the teacher now can announce ‘any twats’ who want to dance should f*** off if there isn’t enough men or

Men get in for free next week !!!


Men happy , women happy and you dance with your partner till the cows come home

On a serious note I cant believe how the forum could jump down the throat of an individual who may have raised a concern

[DavidB]

On a serious note I cant believe how the forum could jump down the throat of an individual who may have raised a concern

Sorry Stewart, but if anyone tells me who I can and can't dance with, I will tell them to f*** off. And I won't be polite about it.

[stewart38]

Sorry Stewart, but if anyone tells me who I can and can't dance with, I will tell them to f*** off. And I won't be polite about it.

But thats isnt good PR

My ex wife often said I couldnt hog a girl for more then two dances

Im still alive so didn’t tell her to f*** O**

[Piglet]

She stated that I was a taxi dancer and should not be dancing freestyle when there was so many extra women.

I have never heard so much rubbish!

If there are too many women, then the ones that will probably get less dances are the ones that come along without men I would guess - perhaps she needs to encourage her men friends to give it a try rather than verbally abuse you.

Glad you're feeling better - sorry that a comment like that was made to you

[Dreadful Scathe]

.... should not be dancing freestyle ..... I was not taxiing that night and sat out most of the night any way.

Not sure what I would say, but it would probably end with "and the horse you road in on".

[Dreadful Scathe]

My ex wife often said I couldnt hog a girl for more then two dances*

Im sure DavidB would be the first to agree that doing what your wife says is a different matter entirely

[stewart38]

Firstly the womens not on duty and has the right to dance with anyone else she likes . The guy I hear isn’t a taxi dancers so he can I guess dance with who ever

I assume as a taxi dancer even off duty you didn’t pay ?

I don’t know the circumstances the women was clearly upset and moved to make what I guess was a unwarranted approach and I assume ‘was out of order’. Know one knows what was said apart from the two that were there . Is she on the forum ?, she might have said a off duty taxi dancer danced 12 songs with a guy when there were 35 ladies over all night , we don’t know?. Id be pissed of if that was me

I would have thought a better approach would be sure he can dance with you next, instead of this f *** attitude

We have women moaning on this forum of endlessly of not having enough men to dance with and the fact that some women do ‘hog’ men . If the women dare say anything tell them to F** *** .

I just think the response sounds OTT

[Feelingpink]

IMO, she was out of order - particularly in her "expectation" that you should be leading. Even if you are on taxi duty, I would say that your primary "duty" is to the beginner guys, not the beginner women. I actually (nicely) turn down women when I'm on taxi duty "because the guys need all the help they can get"

Four dances in an evening hardly constitutes "hogging" in my book (especially as not all at once). It might be worth pointing out to her that your partner has just as much right to dance with whom he wants as she does to dance with him...

You are definitely not in the wrong.

And if she has a problem with your view, BOTH of you will stay home and she won't have ANY opportunity to dance with him at all.

[ElaineB]

I have been unwell and unable to dance properly for a while now and am only just getting back into the swing of things. My life partner and I still went dancing and I still taxiied. During freestyle, I would sit chatting he would dance his cotton socks off. I missed dancing with him and others big style.

My point is; the other night I was actually feeling well enough to dance. I had two warm up dances with my partner and few dances with others during the begginers 15 min freestyle. He done the class I watched, there was 15 extra women and I was conserving energy for more dances later. after intermediate class He danced for a while and came and got me for a further two dances.

One woman (who knew my situation) came up to me and complained that I had hogged my partner all night and who did I think I was. She stated that I was a taxi dancer and should not be dancing freestyle when there was so many extra women.

I was flabergasted at her cheek and for once stuck for words. I often danced as a leader with this and other women when men are scarce and did not quite know what to say.

Do other folk feel the same as her. Did I really do wrong? I was not taxiing that night and sat out most of the night any way.

I would suggest that you ask the Teacher to point out to her/the class that you were not/are not on duty and therefore will be dancing as a 'muggle' for the night. And yes, you have the right to dance with whomever you wish when not on duty!

I am amazed at her attitude, especially as you have stated that 'she knew your situation'!

Hope your health continues to improve!


Elaine

[MartinHarper]

I think I'd want to suggest to the lady in question that she become "part of the solution". She could do this by learning to lead and leading other women in freestyle, or by recruiting lots of new beginner men to Ceroc.

It sounds to me like an unthinking comment brought on by frustration, and not worthy of extensive reflection.

[killingtime]

I would have thought a better approach would be sure he can dance with you next, instead of this f *** attitude

Maybe a better approach in terms of diplomacy but not the one I'd take. First of why should Buttons hand around her partner like he is a bartering chip? I'd think her partner might be a little annoyed that he was being told to dance with someone to justify the fact he has chosen to dance with his partner.

I was at the venue and I didn't think there was such a shortage of men that one man being busy would make that much of a difference (I'm maybe not paying that much attention though). Buttons wasn't on taxi duty; so she isn't meant to be dancing with a particular group of people. She was also taking it easy and that means that most of the dances she had would need to be with someone she trusted wouldn't push her too much.

I would carry on but I'd just get into a rant so: I don't think what she was suggesting was reasonable.

[LilyB]

Im sure DavidB would be the first to agree that doing what your wife says is a different matter entirely

Amen to that

[DavidB]

I assume as a taxi dancer even off duty you didn’t pay ?

So what? Off duty means off duty.

she might have said a off duty taxi dancer danced 12 songs with a guy when there were 35 ladies over all night , we don’t know?. Id be pissed of if that was me

Again - off duty means OFF DUTY.

I find it bad enough when teachers are expected to work for nothing. But taxi-dancers get far less for working the same amount of time. I doubt you could legally employ someone at the rate they effectively get. To tell them they are never off duty is wrong.

[Buttons]

Maybe a better approach in terms of diplomacy but not the one I'd take. First of why should Buttons hand around her partner like he is a bartering chip? I'd think her partner might be a little annoyed that he was being told to dance with someone to justify the fact he has chosen to dance with his partner.

I was at the venue and I didn't think there was such a shortage of men that one man being busy would make that much of a difference (I'm maybe not paying that much attention though). Buttons wasn't on taxi duty; so she isn't meant to be dancing with a particular group of people. She was also taking it easy and that means that most of the dances she had would need to be with someone she trusted wouldn't push her too much.

I would carry on but I'd just get into a rant so: I don't think what she was suggesting was reasonable.

It was on Monday night KT not on Tuesday. 15 extra women. As you know I have not had many dances lately and as a general rule I do not hog my partner all night. It would be boring for both of us. We dance 2 dances at beggining, 1 somewhere in the middle and 1 near end. Unless a tune we like comes on. I still only dance with him about 4 times though IMHO he is a great dancer and everyone wants to dance with him. So do I