View Poll Results: Ladies - what are you looking for in a dance

Voters
68. You may not vote on this poll
  • Lots of different moves

    11 16.18%
  • Simple moves, but well led

    33 48.53%
  • Musical Interpretation

    60 88.24%
  • Chance to improvise

    23 33.82%
Multiple Choice Poll.
Page 3 of 6 FirstFirst 123456 LastLast
Results 41 to 60 of 115

Thread: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

  1. #41
    Commercial Operator
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    ascot
    Posts
    815
    Rep Power
    11
    The answer, Rougeforever, is to ask the advanced dancers if you want them to dance with you. They will say 'yes please' and smile - probably

    Speaking personally, they don't always smile, sometimes they have a look of fear: but I think they're just pretending [/B][/QUOTE]



    I love dancing with beginers ,intermediate but just as i get there they run away...

  2. #42
    Registered User Rougeforever's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Solihull, West Midlands
    Posts
    63
    Rep Power
    11
    Originally posted by Andy McGregor

    The answer, Rougeforever, is to ask the advanced dancers if you want them to dance with you. They will say 'yes please' and smile - probably
    You're absolutely right, and I agree with you

    There is this one wonderful dancer who I have been trying to build up the courage to ask to dance at Solihull for a couple of months - but I'm so worried about being such a horrific novice that I'm actually scared to ask.

    You need to meet me away from the dance floor to understand how out of character that is for me.

    You know how there are shy people who gain more confidence by dancing...? I'm a confident person made shy by dancing.

    But of course, you're right. Not only are some of them wonderful dancers, but they're charming people too.

    Damn this self-doubt !

  3. #43
    Commercial Operator
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Location
    Sussex by the Sea
    Posts
    9,276
    Rep Power
    15
    Originally posted by Rougeforever
    There is this one wonderful dancer who I have been trying to build up the courage to ask to dance at Solihull for a couple of months - but I'm so worried about being such a horrific novice that I'm actually scared to ask.

    Hearken to the word of Eleanor Roosevelt:

    "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent"


    And here are the words of Andy:

    It's only dancing: not even slightly serious: so don't take it seriously

  4. #44
    Registered User linda's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Location
    Monifieth
    Posts
    114
    Rep Power
    11
    Originally posted by Stuart M
    Aw, c'mon linda, I said that 2 years ago (exactly 2 years ago funnily enough)!

    Besides I can't always be surprising, cos then I'd never be surprising if you see what I mean
    Sorry Stuart But I was a beginner 2 years ago and thought the 'forum' was something from the Roman empire!!
    Not always surprising?.... well.... you've always got a twinkle in your eye and a cheeky wee grin on your face so I always wonder what's coming next!

    Linda

  5. #45
    Forum Bombshell - Our Queen! Lory's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    North London
    Posts
    9,918
    Blog Entries
    2
    Rep Power
    17

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    Last night I had the most amazingly strange dance.

    This guy asked me to dance, he danced perfectly in time to the music, executing all the moves correctly, not even dancing in circles but it was all very robotic (not in the cool sense) like he had been programmed, he didn't look at me once, keeping a very serious face, despite my attempts to catch his eye and smile a couple of times, I actually started to look for where the batteries went in!

    At the end of the dance I couldn't resist asking him... Are you having fun? He looked extremely startled and looked at me as if I was mad! And replied in a very assertive manor YES! then he walked off, looking totally bemused!
    I had to giggle to myself, if that's him having FUN, I'd hate to see him when he's not!

    I really can't work out what people like that get out of an evening?? Any clues anybody?
    MODERATOR AT YOUR SERVICE
    "If you're going to do something tonight, that you know you'll be sorry for in the morning, plan a lie in." Lorraine

  6. #46
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Worcester, UK
    Posts
    4,157
    Rep Power
    12

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    I expect he gets the same things out of it that everyone else does. Chances are he was just concentrating on getting the dance right. We can't all be extroverts, thankfully.

  7. #47
    Omnipotent Moderator Tiggerbabe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2002
    Location
    Dundee, United Kin
    Posts
    5,844
    Rep Power
    10

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lory
    I really can't work out what people like that get out of an evening?? Any clues anybody?
    Bit harsh Lory, as Martin says maybe he was just concentrating - or maybe he's been plucking up courage to ask you to dance for ages and fancies you like crazy - couldn't believe his luck that you accepted and spent the next 3 minutes trying to dazzle you.........

    Maybe something awful has happened in his life and that was the first time he's ventured out for ages.

    Who knows? Could be a multitude of reasons that he didn't smile as much as you would have liked but it really doesn't have to mean he wasn't enjoying himself.

    "If you rebel against high heels, take care to do so in a very smart hat.'' George Bernard Shaw

  8. #48
    Forum Bombshell - Our Queen! Lory's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    North London
    Posts
    9,918
    Blog Entries
    2
    Rep Power
    17

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by Sheena
    Bit harsh Lory,
    AWWWW Sheena, I can assure you I was perfectly lovely to him and he will be none the wiser to how I felt!

    and I bet he asks me again next week if he's there! after all, when I asked him if he was having fun, he said YES!
    MODERATOR AT YOUR SERVICE
    "If you're going to do something tonight, that you know you'll be sorry for in the morning, plan a lie in." Lorraine

  9. #49
    Omnipotent Moderator Tiggerbabe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2002
    Location
    Dundee, United Kin
    Posts
    5,844
    Rep Power
    10

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lory
    and he will be none the wiser to how I felt!
    Unless he's one of our many browsers eh?
    I'm sure you were lovely to him Lory, it was the "people like that" comment I thought was a bit harsh
    "If you rebel against high heels, take care to do so in a very smart hat.'' George Bernard Shaw

  10. #50
    Forum Bombshell - Our Queen! Lory's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    North London
    Posts
    9,918
    Blog Entries
    2
    Rep Power
    17

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by Sheena
    it was the "people like that" comment I thought was a bit harsh
    Wrong choice of words in hindsight!
    MODERATOR AT YOUR SERVICE
    "If you're going to do something tonight, that you know you'll be sorry for in the morning, plan a lie in." Lorraine

  11. #51
    Commercial Operator
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    London W2
    Posts
    43
    Rep Power
    11

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by Rougeforever

    There is this one wonderful dancer who I have been trying to build up the courage to ask to dance at Solihull for a couple of months - but I'm so worried about being such a horrific novice that I'm actually scared to ask.
    Just remember that as a Lady you can't do anything wrong...if you don't go in the desired direction or misinterpret anything the man is trying to do then, guess what, it is HIS fault for not being a good enough STRONG BUT GENTLE lead. So relax, smile and go ask the guy to dance!!

    Life shrinks or expands in proportion to ones courage (anais nin)

  12. #52
    Registered User Yogi_Bear's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Norwich
    Posts
    1,109
    Rep Power
    11

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lory
    Last night I had the most amazingly strange dance.

    This guy asked me to dance, he danced perfectly in time to the music, executing all the moves correctly, not even dancing in circles but it was all very robotic (not in the cool sense) like he had been programmed, he didn't look at me once, keeping a very serious face, despite my attempts to catch his eye and smile a couple of times, I actually started to look for where the batteries went in!

    At the end of the dance I couldn't resist asking him... Are you having fun? He looked extremely startled and looked at me as if I was mad! And replied in a very assertive manor YES! then he walked off, looking totally bemused!
    I had to giggle to myself, if that's him having FUN, I'd hate to see him when he's not!

    I really can't work out what people like that get out of an evening?? Any clues anybody?
    In my frequent sessions of observing other dancers I've seen the phenomenon in both men and women and wondered the same as you. I'm not sure whether or not it comes down to the way MJ is often taught or not, but probably more due to personalities. I may not always practice what I preach, but my approach is often to concentrate on the contact and enjoyment at the expense of the accuracy and followability of what I am doing. Usually that works well - but not always...
    yb

  13. #53
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Whitley Bay
    Posts
    335
    Rep Power
    11

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by Rougeforever
    As a beginner -

    I like:

    Someone smiling when they ask me to dance.
    Someone who leads gently, even when my following is rubbish - just because I get it wrong doesn't mean you need to heave and haul me through moves - give me a chance !
    Someone who smiles during the dance and makes face contact ....
    (I have a friend who dances who is just so shy he can't possibly look a lady in the eye when he is leading her - I've told him that he MUST at least look at her face - even if he can't make eye-contact - otherwise it's like dancing with someone who is just using you as a prop to their own dance)
    Someone who will use slightly unfamilliar moves with me to try and vary the dance (I've never been taught the hatchback, but a few men have led it successfully with me).
    Someone who can see when I am horrifically out of breath or am flagging and will lead smaller (or less demanding) moves. I never try to let on - but I'm sure most people flag at some point in the evening - particularly after the kind of days I have !
    Someone who leads clearly. Being a beginner - I tend to dance with beginners and less experienced men (all you advanced dancers dance with each other !) so when I dance with someone with a clear lead I am filled with happiness.
    When dancing with someone I dont know, I am never sure how much eye contact to make, or to do close moves. I hear stories from women friends about pervy or suggestive men, so I perhaps err too much on the side of caution.

  14. #54
    Registered User Yogi_Bear's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Norwich
    Posts
    1,109
    Rep Power
    11

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    I normally find that there is a mutual process of adjustment fairly early on, in which either partner can increase or decrease the amount of intimacy until an level is reached that both are comfortable with. Basically the chemistry is right or it isn't. But in any event it is quite straightforward to make your partner feel involved without making them uncomfortable with the intimacy. Almost anything's better than dancing on autopilot and ignoring your partner altogether...

  15. #55
    Registered User Whitebeard's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Cheltenham, Glouce
    Posts
    2,307
    Rep Power
    10

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by Yogi_Bear
    ..... dancing on autopilot ......
    Oh gawd, how I wish I could do that !!!!

    The smiles would be radiant.

  16. #56
    Registered User Magic Hans's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Nottingham - for n
    Posts
    825
    Rep Power
    10

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by Sheena
    ...

    Maybe something awful has happened in his life and that was the first time he's ventured out for ages.

    Who knows? Could be a multitude of reasons that he didn't smile as much as you would have liked but it really doesn't have to mean he wasn't enjoying himself.


    Let me guess ..... errrrrr ..... you're a social worker! Right?

    Seriously, it's great to find people who look beyond the exterior, giving the benefit of the doubt. I try to do the same. Sometimes it helps me, and gives me an insight .... sometimes nothing!! [Probably need to change my wavelength or something!]

  17. #57
    Omnipotent Moderator Tiggerbabe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2002
    Location
    Dundee, United Kin
    Posts
    5,844
    Rep Power
    10

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by ianhadling
    Let me guess ..... errrrrr ..... you're a social worker! Right?
    Nope! Not even close
    "If you rebel against high heels, take care to do so in a very smart hat.'' George Bernard Shaw

  18. #58
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Whitley Bay
    Posts
    335
    Rep Power
    11

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?


  19. #59
    Cheeky by nature Little Monkey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Still in Dundee....
    Posts
    4,053
    Rep Power
    12

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    Dancing, for me, is meant to be FUN! If people take it too seriously, it looses some of the appeal....

    What I look for in a dance is:
    - Lots of smiles
    - Eye contact
    - A good lead (better with few and easy moves that are lead well, than a whole lot of very fancy moves that aren't lead correctly!)
    - A partner who is actually dancing WITH ME, paying attention to how well I can follow his lead, trying not to send me crashing into other dancers, doesn't do dips / drops without knowing I'm comfortable with them, and not just concentrating on how cool HE is looking on the dance floor!

    I have danced with people who are tecnically very good dancers, but make me feel like I'm not "part of the dance", just some kind of prop, and it's not a nice feeling. These dancers all seem to be in the "taking it too seriously" category, and very often don't look like they're having fun at all!

    So guys, if you want to dance with me, expect a lot of giggles and silly behaviour, 'cus I just dance for the fun of it!!

    Monkey

  20. #60
    Registered User Tazmanian Devil's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Location
    Silly land
    Posts
    5,010
    Rep Power
    13

    Re: Ladies - What are you looking for in a dance?

    I am always looking for fun in a dance, Wether the dance is with a beginner, or an advanced dancer. When dancing with an advanced dancer the most important aspects to me are music interpretation, eye contact, and having a enjoyable dance when dancing with a beginner the most important thing is that we both have fun and the newcomer goes away happy to ask me for a dance again.

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. Guys, do you ask ladies to dance?
    By Lory in forum Let's talk about dance
    Replies: 36
    Last Post: 20th-February-2007, 07:31 PM
  2. Ladies, do you ask guys to dance?
    By Patrick in forum Let's talk about dance
    Replies: 47
    Last Post: 23rd-September-2006, 09:24 AM
  3. Supadance Ladies Dance Shoes For Sale
    By Classified Adverts in forum Chit Chat
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 7th-September-2006, 06:12 PM
  4. Thank you ladies
    By robd in forum Let's talk about dance
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 8th-August-2006, 03:20 PM
  5. What do ladies want from the 'ideal' dance?
    By Gadget in forum Intermediate Corner
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 3rd-August-2004, 10:12 PM

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •