I don't do much provincial dancing, so I'll have to take at face-value your assurances about the tone of out-of-the-way dance venues that you frequent, and whether they do or don't hand out chastity belts at the door.Originally Posted by Andy McGregor
So is ESG saying that provincial dance classes are primarily for learning to dance and urban ones are primarily for people on the pull?
But Ceroc London was sufficiently interested in attracting new young and single members that they ran mini-Ceroc lessons at Chemistry - a series of singles parties held in central London venues. It was Linda Barker (now Mrs. Ellard) who was teaching at the one I helped with. And there seemed to be no reticence that night about the fact that yes, some people do come to Ceroc "to pull".
If I had more than a customer's interest in the issue, I'd be just as critical if anyone suggested that the *only* (as opposed to a common) reason to attend Ceroc was to meet girls, but that doesn't appear to be a popular point of view. Ceroc is a robust and broad church, which is why I like it. The only threat to that diversity that I can see is a surfeit of people who are wont to tell others why they should or (in this case) shouldn't dance.
Last edited by El Salsero Gringo; 2nd-January-2006 at 05:47 PM.
Ceroc central have also run Ceroc party nights for various organisations and individuals, and some of those organisations have been singles clubs. Nevertheless dancing does seem to be the primary motivation for the vast majority of members regularly attending the normal classes and freestyles that I have attended.
If ESG is accusing me of saying there is a reason people shouldn't dance he is wrong - nothing new there :yawn: Dancing is a fabulous hobby and should be open to all, singles, marrieds, gay, straight, looking, not looking, celibate, etc, etc. But, IMHO, to label a MJ night as a singles night it to say "don't come if you're married or have a partner, it's not for you"
What I'm saying is that people shouldn't come dancing and complain that there are married women in the room - certainly not when the implication is that there aren't enough single women present. They shouldn't regard a MJ night as a singles night. MJ nights are a dance class, singles nights are exactly that. For people to come to a MJ night and expect it to be a singles night is wrong IMHO.
If that isn't what you are saying then I'm delighted to be wrong. But there are lots of people in this thread who are saying exactly that.
Re-read the thread, expecially the tone taken by KillingTime, Andreas (with the greatest of courtesy - as always), Wittybird, Scotch Bonnet, Heather and Tazmanian Devil. THey all seem rather scandalized and shocked that a man would admit to attending a dance with the intention of chatting up girls. They shouldn't be.
True. Which is why I would complain bitterly if it was labelled exclusively as a singles night.Dancing is a fabulous hobby and should be open to all, singles, marrieds, gay, straight, looking, not looking, celibate, etc, etc. But, IMHO, to label a MJ night as a singles night it to say "don't come if you're married or have a partner, it's not for you"
Obviously this is not a forum (Forum?) to expect many people to agree that Ceroc makes a good place to "pull" - since those who think that are out doing it, not wasting time on the Internet. To put it bluntly - they're having too much fun getting laid.What I'm saying is that people shouldn't come dancing and complain that there are married women in the room - certainly not when the implication is that there aren't enough single women present. They shouldn't regard a MJ night as a singles night. MJ nights are a dance class, singles nights are exactly that. For people to come to a MJ night and expect it to be a singles night is wrong IMHO.
I don't think you and I disagree as much as the noise generated in this thread would imply, Andy...
Right I have to be careful what I say now, but lets see if I can say this without getting annoyed and thrown off the forum:
When I Taxi'd at Charlton and Greenwich, as one of my discussion points with the beginners was to state that Ceroc is fun, and that people come here to have fun. Ceroc is a place where women on there own (be them married or not) can go to Ceroc venues without the fear that they are going to a pick up Joint. Not only that but that should they have a dance with a bloke who then comes on a bit strong they only need to mention it to one of the other women and then that man would find it would not be very long before he found non of the women would dance with him.
I am not saying that relationships do not occur and develop at ceroc, they do (Infact I am in a very strong relationship at the moment with a woman I met at Ceroc a few Years ago) and are bound to occur as all the people there have a common enjoyment - don't know if that makes sense or not!!
Many men enjoy dancing, and so do many women, unfortunately not all men do, especially the ones that are married to the women that enjoy dancing - why should this mean that the "wifey" can not go dancing!!!!!!!!! a bit of a stoneage thought dont you think
OK High horse stay, I will get of you now.
Not at all.
But do not go to Ceroc thinking of it as a pick up joint - it aint.
It is one of the very few places men and women alike can go and have fun without the added pressures of being picked on.
:If that was the case I would have alot of relationships going on with both male and female dancers.
Given that the debate so far kicked off by Salsa guy has generated a lot of heat, if a bit less light, I wanted to re-read the original and reconsider it.
Your impression? That's fair enough. Doesn't map to mine but we (presumably) go to different venues, meet different crowds, etc. However I have very rarely experienced the "thanks for the dance, got to get back to the annoyed looking hushband/boyfriend" - perhaps you need to look at the fact that there may be other reasons for this reaction than the fact that the person in question is married.
Really? Based on what? Again, it doesn't tally with my experience which is not to say it doesn't tally with yours.
I don't see anything wrong with that and I believe that may be a fairly accurate assessment of (part of ?) the motive for a lot of men (not necessarily just the single ones) initally attending Ceroc. I think that if a man does not then start to enjoy dancing for dancing's sake this will reflect in his dancing ability and in turn will impact on his attractiveness as a partner and thus his chances of successfully meeting and impressing a prospective partner - unless he looks like Brad Pitt in which case he probably does not need to be trying too hard to meet girls anyway.
One of the aspects of Ceroc that I love is the social and physical interaction between the sexes without the expectation of it leading to a relationship. If this were to be eroded and more people were to be wary of how they acted towards one another for fear of 'leading someone on' I would be saddened. However, as ESG stated, Ceroc is a broad church and it is still possible for single people to meet there and relationships to be formed there without tainting the open, non-intimidatory environment which is one of the major contributory factors to my and, I suspect many others, enjoyment of dancing.
Robert
Great picture Stewart. Unfortunately I can't include the photo in the post but I have to give a bigYes but we dont all dance like youto Witty bird - it looks like the perfect promo poster for Dirty Dancing 3.
Or to put it more bluntly, Salsa Guy:Given that the debate so far kicked off by Salsa guy has generated a lot of heat, if a bit less light, I wanted to re-read the original and reconsider it.Your impression? That's fair enough. Doesn't map to mine ... perhaps you need to look at the fact that there may be other reasons for this reaction than the fact that the person in question is married.
It's not a pick-up joint in one sense only: it would be wrong to assume that everyone you met there was single and available. But it would be just as wrong to assume that nobody (or almost nobody) goes to Ceroc to pick up girls, and that no girls that you meet there are available. As far as real-world pick-up joints go, somewhere like Ceroc, for instance, is ideal. You can dance with someone, talk to them in private for three minutes, see them again the next week if you both like, find out whether they like you too, go for a drink with them afterwards to socialise and so on. That - in my opinion - is the best kind of "pick up joint" - in the nicest possible way. No pressure either way, since many people are *not* there to meet a new partner too.Not at all.
But do not go to Ceroc thinking of it as a pick up joint - it aint.
It is one of the very few places men and women alike can go and have fun without the added pressures of being picked on.
Interesting choice of words, by the way - "picked on" - not sure how picking on someone ever helped win their affection. Leastways, it's never worked for me.
Last edited by El Salsero Gringo; 2nd-January-2006 at 07:54 PM.
Since when have ESG or I let lack of disagreement stand in the way of a good argument?
Oh, don't take any notice of him.
By the way, David, where did you meet your wife?
Last edited by El Salsero Gringo; 2nd-January-2006 at 08:04 PM.
Ooh. I get listed first. I'm special; my mum said so. My apologies at the tone it was actually most in reaction to:
With the lovely implication that women are there to dance and guys (who aren't in a relationship) are there to pull. Which I did take a little offense at. Maybe I'm one of those minority of single men that went dancing to dance.
I really don't have issue with people attending ceroc to meet someone but I was a little taken aback by someone complaining about the lack of single people and the statement above. I also worry that if lots of people did only attend for that reason it would have a detrimental effect on the event.
In my experience, Salsa attracts a different type of person from Modern Jive. Maybe Salsa Guy has stated his preference and should mix with his own kind
One way of reading Salsa Guy's initial post wouldn't take it too seriously.
While it is a pretty good thread subject, and has about the right amount of controversy, it does strike me as a good way to stir things up ( though that may not be the intent here ).
It might be good if Salsa Guy was able to expanded further on his original post.
In any case it's nice to have some well thought out responses, not just "no your in the minority" / casting aspersions on the questioner, and a variety of opinion - In particular some of ESG's contributions.
One consideration, which doesn't reflect on Salsa Guy, is that in the intervening 6 years the age profile could have increased, which would probably tend to reduce the number of single women available.
For example I think the age profile of Elmgrove Leroc has probably increased from the 1994 survey.
http://www.elmgrove-leroc.co.uk/WhatIsLeRoc.htm
And of course we're all six years older, which doesn't always improve attractiveness.
Not scandalized and shocked at all, I am aware that there are guys that go to pull I just don't think that there is a majority of guys with that opinion. If someone is serious about dancing or learning to dance then they go for them reasons, and if by chance they meet a woman/man in the meantime then it's a bonus. For instance The Wacko started dancing 4 years ago and has been seeing his lovely dancing lady friend for 2 years both of them had no intention of hunting for love but it happened.
I'm NOTBeen listed last
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