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Thread: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

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    Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Ok guys, this is an old chestnut but I would like to hear some sensible discussion on this matter:

    Why are there so many married women coming to Ceroc? I get the impression that around 90% of women at most venues are atttached and 90% of men are single looking for a girlfriend or even a date. When I started six years ago it was comparatively easy to meet single girls, go out on dates, make friends or even girfriends. Now its thanks for the dance, got to get back to the annoyed looking hushband/boyfriend.

    Is it because too many men are going now and all they want to do is rub themselves against the women ??

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    Registered User El Salsero Gringo's Avatar
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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by Salsa guy
    Is it because too many men are going now and all they want to do is rub themselves against the women ??
    On the contrary - if one takes any notice of most of the other threads on this Forum, there aren't *enough* men going.

    Perhaps the solution to getting more men to dance is to get more *single* women to go to Ceroc?

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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by Salsa guy
    Why are there so many married women coming to Ceroc?
    Perhaps they enjoy dancing for dancing's sake rather than as a prelude to anything else.

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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by robd
    Perhaps they enjoy dancing for dancing's sake rather than as a prelude to anything else.
    well said

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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by robd
    Perhaps they enjoy dancing for dancing's sake rather than as a prelude to anything else.
    For me, it is just the dancing, as quoted above... if I make a new friend, even better, but that is all..

    I suppose it may be a physical high you get from doing aerobics or any other exercise that you enjoy.. its energetic, fun and for most of the time for me i get to laugh a lot.. i just love to have fun...

    It is nice though, if the guy is appealing, but really it doesnt matter in the slightest as long as he can smile and have fun

    Also, I feel on the whole it is a safe environment (not like a nightclub) and rarely feel uncomfortable, or worried that my dance partner will behave inappropriately.. that is priceless..

    By the way, Im a girl and hope I havent hijacked your thread...

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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    I do understand why women (married or not) do like coming to Ceroc but let us be realistic. If you are a single man and straight you are more than likely coming to dance to meet a girl. What is wrong with that? Perfectly normal as I see it.

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    The Gobby one! WittyBird's Avatar
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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by Salsa guy
    I do understand why women (married or not) do like coming to Ceroc but let us be realistic. If you are a single man and straight you are more than likely coming to dance to meet a girl. What is wrong with that? Perfectly normal as I see it.
    What a load of........
    I personally believe people come to dance not pull

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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by Salsa guy
    I do understand why women (married or not) do like coming to Ceroc but let us be realistic. If you are a single man and straight you are more than likely coming to dance to meet a girl. What is wrong with that? Perfectly normal as I see it.
    Nope. That's just you....

    I go to dance.

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    Registered User El Salsero Gringo's Avatar
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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Do I detect a slightly (or more than slightly) "holier-than-thou" attitude from some pure souls towards anyone who does come to Ceroc to meet girls?

    People dance for lots of reasons; single men wanting to meet single girls is a natural state of affairs, and Ceroc can be an excellent place to do that.

    Speaking only for myself, I'd do what I could to encourage anyone who feels Ceroc would benefit them - for pretty-much whatever reason - to come along. Not jump down their throats.

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    Registered User frodo's Avatar
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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by Salsa guy
    ...
    Why are there so many married women coming to Ceroc? I get the impression that around 90% of women at most venues are atttached and 90% of men are single looking for a girlfriend or even a date. When I started six years ago it was comparatively easy to meet single girls, go out on dates, make friends or even girfriends. Now its thanks for the dance, got to get back to the annoyed looking hushband/boyfriend.
    Perhaps the question could be turned around, why relatively fewer married men.

    If we discount people who come as a couple ( they clearly don't matter ).


    One reason, I think that is that it is relatively easy for a single man to take up dancing ( among other things it is much easier to keep quiet, atleast until a certain level of proficiency has been reached ).

    Ladies seem to often come in groups; so married or single may matter less - perhaps it is a group activity.


    I do remember overhearing one lady who'd just got married, and just started dancing because she wanted a separate activity. It would be interesting to know if this is a common motivation.

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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by Salsa guy
    I do understand why women (married or not) do like coming to Ceroc but let us be realistic. If you are a single man and straight you are more than likely coming to dance to meet a girl. What is wrong with that? Perfectly normal as I see it.
    No, this is not normal. If all you want to do is meet a girl you should go speed dating or join a singles club. If you'd like to learn to dance then you should go to dance class. We occasionally get people coming to our classes on the pull. If they achieve their objective we never see them again - and if they don't achieve their objective we never see them again. We don't need people who come dancing with the sole objective of pulling

    We do get people who pair up at dance class. Just like you get people who pair up in any other situation where the sexes mix. Salsa guy is complaining that there are no single girls at his dance classes. They're a dance class. Expect to learn to dance. Any other expectation is one you've made up for yourself. You might as well complain that you don't get taught the rules of badminton at a cookery night class

    Having said that, in our area we get plenty of single women. In fact, their usual complaint is that there are no eligible single guys. There are single guys: it's just the "eligible" that needs fixing. I think a mix of alcohol and low lighting might help

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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by frodo

    I do remember overhearing one lady who'd just got married, and just started dancing because she wanted a separate activity. It would be interesting to know if this is a common motivation.
    I do know several ladies who prefer to keep husband/boyfriend separate from Ceroc because they like having an activity they can do independently from him - not because they're planning to get up to anything on the sly!

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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by Salsa guy
    Why are there so many married women coming to Ceroc? I get the impression that around 90% of women at most venues are atttached and 90% of men are single .... Now its thanks for the dance, got to get back to the annoyed looking hushband/boyfriend.
    In some ways being virtually single (boyfriend/husband isn't there) is better than the real thing, for someone you dance with regularly, as they're less likely to stop dancing because they've met someone.

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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by Salsa guy
    I would like to hear some sensible discussion on this matter:
    Ok, then...

    I get the impression that around 90% of women at most venues are atttached and 90% of men are single looking for a girlfriend or even a date.
    Could you elaborate a bit on exactly where you get this impression?

    When I started six years ago it was comparatively easy to meet single girls, go out on dates, make friends or even girfriends. Now its thanks for the dance, got to get back to the annoyed looking hushband/boyfriend.
    Where are all these annoyed looking husbands/boyfriends?

    I've danced with lots of people for years, and never once have I encountered this. If you're just dancing with them, why are they looking annoyed?

    Is it because too many men are going now and all they want to do is rub themselves against the women ??
    Is it your experience that the guys you know that dance, just do this?

    I think you might find that if so, it's unusual, at least going by the people who are interested enough in dancing to hang out on a dance forum.

    We've talked on many occasions about how representative of the Ceroc world at large the forum is or isn't... maybe your experiences are different from what a lot of us are used to.

    So tell us more

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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by El Salsero Gringo
    Do I detect a slightly (or more than slightly) "holier-than-thou" attitude from some pure souls towards anyone who does come to Ceroc to meet girls?
    I'm afraid I have to agree with that attitude though.

    Since I met my girlfriend and ceroc I can hardly say that I didn't see ceroc as somewhere I might have met someone it's just not my primary reason for going. Furthermore it was outside of ceroc where we actually decided to go dating.

    I think people who are just there to pull have very little interest in dancing and will often disrupt classes with attempting to chat up their partners. Most importantly I feel that people would feel less "safe" if the way they danced was constantly taken as a sign of interest. Occasionally there is a singles night that descends on Ceroc in Edinburgh which does have a lot of people doing just that.

    I haven't paid that much attention but I wouldn't say there was a higher than normal ratio of married women in ceroc compared to the average population.

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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    It is right, there is nothing wrong with guys looking for girls and vice versa. Certainly dance is a good environment to do that because one spends a lot of time in the other person's space. BUT ...

    Quote Originally Posted by Salsa guy
    When I started six years ago it was comparatively easy to meet single girls, go out on dates, make friends or even girfriends. Now its thanks for the dance, got to get back to the annoyed looking hushband/boyfriend.
    Crikey! Are you trying to make sure you are not going to get any dances with single girls in future? What you wrote there sounds like finding dates was your only intention. Worse even, you are calling the process, hence the girls EASY! We all know that most Salsa venues are meat markets. I personally find it rather refreshing to go to an MJ dance and NOT have the feeling that I am being taxed for potential abilities in bed.

    If I was to judge you only by those words, I'd think that you are one of those persons who make a lot of single girls and even me as a guy change venue. I so much hope you just phrased that accidentally the way you did!

    Quote Originally Posted by Salsa guy
    Is it because too many men are going now and all they want to do is rub themselves against the women ??
    Judging by the above paragraph you'd be one of them.

    ------------------------

    The reason why I think MJ is well-attended by married/attached ladies is because it is easy enough to learn to get their respective partners into it. Dancing with a stranger is nice and can be great fun, but dancing with your partner beats it hands down ... if the music is right

    Furthermore, married women are more concerned about the meatmarket syndrome of Salsa venues, hence they feel saver.


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    Registered User El Salsero Gringo's Avatar
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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by Andy McGregor
    No, this is not normal. If all you want to do is meet a girl you should go speed dating or join a singles club. If you'd like to learn to dance then you should go to dance class. We occasionally get people coming to our classes on the pull. If they achieve their objective we never see them again - and if they don't achieve their objective we never see them again. We don't need people who come dancing with the sole objective of pulling
    There's a perfectly acceptable middle ground, where you can enjoy BOTH dancing and meeting single people of the opposite sex. I don't think it's wise - or constructive - to lay down 'good' and 'bad' reasons for taking up dancing. The more so because someone who does start dancing 'just' to meet girls might very well find that they enjoy the dancing enough to keep it for its own sake - and behold - another regular customer for you, and another committed dancer for your venue.

    Quote Originally Posted by killingtime
    I think people who are just there to pull have very little interest in dancing and will often disrupt classes with attempting to chat up their partners.
    ... a breathtakingly inaccurate generalisation...
    Quote Originally Posted by killingtime
    Most importantly I feel that people would feel less "safe" if the way they danced was constantly taken as a sign of interest.
    ... and beside the point since there are plenty of ways to signal (dis)interest on and off the dance floor without altering your style of dance. Anyone who's been to Ceroc more than twice learns the difference.

    I'm rather disappointed at the snooty way people in this thread look down on those "non-committed" Cerocers who come for a while to meet people, *don't* think that dance is the be-all and end-all of existence, and don't take things quite as seriously as they might. Remember - their entrance money speaks as loudly as yours, and without them Ceroc would be about as successful as a chocolate teapot.

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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by El Salsero Gringo
    Do I detect a slightly (or more than slightly) "holier-than-thou" attitude from some pure souls towards anyone who does come to Ceroc to meet girls?
    Not at all. Salsa guy just made a completely inaccurate generalisation, based presumably on what he does (hence, I made a similar on back at him).

    I don't see a problem with people who come to pull - provided that they do it in a way that isn't going to upset the ladies there (or indeed, if they are ladies, upset the guys - though I do understand that this is less likely ).

    And I've dated some ladies that I've met at Ceroc. So could hardly be holier than thou....

    However, what I said. I come to dance. Anything else might be a bonus

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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by El Salsero Gringo
    I'm rather disappointed at the snooty way people in this thread look down on those "non-committed" Cerocers who come for a while to meet people, *don't* think that dance is the be-all and end-all of existence, and don't take things quite as seriously as they might. Remember - their entrance money speaks as loudly as yours, and without them Ceroc would be about as successful as a chocolate teapot.
    Neither do I think 'dance' is all that should be going on.In an earlier thread I have posted that probably the majority of dancers are in one way or another looking for a partner for life, or part of that. So losing them would mean ruining the business. However, if picking up a b**k is the only motivation, which is how he came across, as he used plural, IS bad. Just imagine what it does to the dignity of girls he as a guy has 'gone through' or vice versa of guys that have fallen for a femme fatale. It poisons the atmosphere.

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    Re: Why are there so many married women at Ceroc??

    Quote Originally Posted by Salsa guy
    Ok guys, this is an old chestnut but I would like to hear some sensible discussion on this matter:

    Why are there so many married women coming to Ceroc? I get the impression that around 90% of women at most venues are atttached and 90% of men are single looking for a girlfriend or even a date. When I started six years ago it was comparatively easy to meet single girls, go out on dates, make friends or even girfriends. Now its thanks for the dance, got to get back to the annoyed looking hushband/boyfriend.

    Is it because too many men are going now and all they want to do is rub themselves against the women ??
    Why wouldn't there be so many married women,Ceroc (contrary to popular belief)is not a singles club.If you do meet someone then 'Fandabbydosy" but if not ,so what !!!
    Dancing is a good fun hobby and is to a lot of women I have spoken to ,their keep fit night,beats sweating in the gym !!
    Maybe you should think about a good on line dating agency !!

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