Refusing a dance - is there ever a good reason?

[Andy McGregor]

‘really good dancer’ who ignores her and walks away when she approaches him.

Maybe he's just walking towards someone else. Some women accuse me of walking away from or avoiding them earlier in the evening - usually while I'm dancing with them I never walk away from anyone when I see them coming towards me. But I do have a good idea who I'm going to ask next and usually rush over before they get asked by another guy. To any woman behind me it might look like a hasty retreat - but only if she was of that particular mind-set.

Tell her to forget about this guy and ask me. How will you/she know me? I'll be the one rushing in the opposite direction into the arms of another woman

[Msfab]

Actually it's a particular group who go to there and to Jango who are so far up there own butt they refuse most people.


so don't worry

I asked three times as was given a blank No!

so do not take it to heart they are a very small minority

Hope you had a good time anyway

Pot, Kettle and Black spring to mind Mr Rich

[jacksondonut]

Exactly my attitude. Thanks Carole

Yes, think you have the right idea. I used to have hurt feelings when refused, but now have decided to stick to the people whose body language is a lot friendlier..

Its pointless having your night spoiled by someone saying 'no', I daresay most of the time it isnt personal.. well, I hope not.

However, I am less likely to ask someone I havent danced with before, for fear of refusal on a few occasions.. It depends on my mood, if I am willing to take a chance and feeling daring, I will 'go for it'.. sometimes, I will just stick with my mates.. having a good dance with a mate is always guaranteed fun!!

[Simon r]

Pot, Kettle and Black spring to mind Mr Rich

sorry explain....

[Lee]

sorry explain....

She means you must do it too.. haha

Lee

[Simon r]

She means you must do it too.. haha

Lee

Sorry but private messaging this person.

I do not know who she is and quote " it is not important who i am" apperently does not know me as i have never refused a dance unless
1. knackered and cant stand let alone dance
2. need a change of shirt
3. need a drink

If this is the case i would of course give this explanation and then try to find them after.
Like i said don't know MSfab and this person really really does not know me

[marty_baby]

Sorry but private messaging this person.

I do not know who she is and quote " it is not important who i am" apperently does not know me as i have never refused a dance unless
1. knackered and cant stand let alone dance
2. need a change of shirt
3. need a drink

If this is the case i would of course give this explanation and then try to find them after.
Like i said don't know MSfab and this person really really does not know me

...um... are you Simon, of Simon and Lisa, who won the 2005 Britroc Open in Brighton?!

...hehe... MsFab is going to have a shock when she opens up her mail tommorow morning!


...I hope this isn't too forward - But she sounds like she was only teasing Simon, and will probably feel terrible tommorow. I wouldn't really worry about it, you come across as a nice amiable kinda chap in real life... and thats what counts

[Andy McGregor]

...um... are you Simon, of Simon and Lisa, who won the 2005 Britroc Open in Brighton?!

...hehe... MsFab is going to have a shock when she opens up her mail tommorow morning!


...I hope this isn't too forward - But she sounds like she was only teasing Simon, and will probably feel terrible tommorow. I wouldn't really worry about it, you come across as a nice amiable kinda chap in real life... and thats what counts

Yes, he is that Simon.

And I've never known Simon to be rude or anything but a great guy. Although we all know he's a bit fat and not as pretty as me

[Cruella]

Sorry but private messaging this person.

I do not know who she is and quote " it is not important who i am" apperently does not know me as i have never refused a dance unless
1. knackered and cant stand let alone dance
2. need a change of shirt
3. need a drink

If this is the case i would of course give this explanation and then try to find them after.
Like i said don't know MSfab and this person really really does not know me

Simon you do know MsFab! she comes to Jango all the time!! I guess that you just didn't realise she was on the forum! It's all these silly secretive names, why can't everyone use their real name like me Im sure she was only playing with you hun. We all know that underneath that sarcasm and p**s taking exterior, you're just lovely. Don't take it seriously, i'm sure she'll be upset if she realises you have been offended.

[wicked blue]

I asked three times as was given a blank No!

There is nothing nice about being refused when asking someone to dance, especially when its more than once...

[Just Wiggle]

There is nothing nice about being refused when asking someone to dance, especially when its more than once...

Especially when, on the rare occasions, you pluck up the courage to ask the top dancers!

[Lee]

Sorry but private messaging this person.

I do not know who she is and quote " it is not important who i am" apperently does not know me as i have never refused a dance unless
1. knackered and cant stand let alone dance
2. need a change of shirt
3. need a drink

If this is the case i would of course give this explanation and then try to find them after.
Like i said don't know MSfab and this person really really does not know me

Sorry, I kinda started that off, i must say i've never heard a bad thing said about you, only good stuff, so yer i assume she was teasing, i assumed you had not heard of the 'pot kettle black' saying that's all.

Lee

[Msfab]

sorry explain....

I have spoken to Simon r and explained what I meant by my original post, All sorted.

Its all bridge under the water!

[Divissima]

I have spoken to Simon r and explained what I meant by my original post, All sorted.

Its all bridge under the water!

Phew! I thought I was going to have to bang some heads together....

[Mary]

I have spoken to Simon r and explained what I meant by my original post, All sorted.

Its all bridge under the water!

Damn. You've kissed and made up far too soon. I was looking forward to a good scrap.

M

[LMC]

"I'm going to practise all the pretzel variations I know" (during Fire... and it was the last track )

Can I turn him down next time? Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease... (actually, I'll just pre-empt by asking him on a track which suits pretzels slightly better, I just wanted to have a whinge)

[Minnie M]

A couple of years ago I 'accused' a fellow forumite of rudely refusing a dance with me - I didn't mention his name but gave a clue which a few people picked up on (haven't got the time for the "Harperlink")

I was then, inundated with PM's and quite a few strong posts by my fellow forumites all in his defence

His reason was he was tired, but I hadn't even got back to where I was standing when I saw him dancing with a very pretty young girl.

If, and for what ever reason, you refuse a dance (and of course there may be genuine reasons to do so) - the way to stop offence - is just seek out that person later and ask her/him to dance - it's no big deal and the dance only lasts a couple of minutes

[David Bailey]

A couple of years ago I 'accused' a fellow forumite of rudely refusing a dance with me - I didn't mention his name but gave a clue which a few people picked up on (haven't got the time for the "Harperlink")

I was then, inundated with PM's and quite a few strong posts by my fellow forumites all in his defence

You've got to be a brave soul to name and shame some people, that's for sure.

If, and for what ever reason, you refuse a dance (and of course there may be genuine reasons to do so) - the way to stop offence - is just seek out that person later and ask her/him to dance - it's no big deal and the dance only lasts a couple of minutes

Absolutely
I got asked to dance (!) on Sat at Woking, but I'd already promised the next dance to another lady. So I danced with her, then sought out the first one and asked her - we had a great dance and (I think) she appreciated it. Mr Virtuous, that's me.

Of course, the trouble is, if you don't go and find that person immediately, you're likely to forget, but the other person may not. So, and this applies to followers and leaders, if you put someone off and say "later?", please make sure you actively seek out that person later to dance with.

[Msfab]

Damn. You've kissed and made up far too soon. I was looking forward to a good scrap.

M

Honestly Mary do you really think I could stay angry for long? Life is too short to be holding grudges and over dancing as well.

The scrap took place in private

[TheTramp]

The scrap took place in private

Is there a video?? (And if so, will it ever be delivered?? )