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Thread: Adapting to your partner

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    Adapting to your partner

    From elsewhere:

    Quote Originally Posted by DavidJames
    really good dancers, I think, should always be able to adapt their dance to their partners level
    Quote Originally Posted by Andreas
    A harmonic simple dance will always look much better than a disharmonic dance...
    I love being thoroughly out-danced by someone way out of my league. Sure they adapt to me - they're so good they do that instinctively. But they don't do it in a way that's safe, or easy. Rather, they take me way out of my comfort zone, and leave me dazed and exhilarated.

    It's not just the gods. It's fun to dance with mortals who don't compromise their style, and force me to adapt to them - that is, as long as I can adapt to them.

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    Registered User Chicklet's Avatar
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    Re: Adapting to your partner

    Quote Originally Posted by MartinHarper
    It's not just the gods. It's fun to dance with mortals who don't compromise their style, and force me to adapt to them - that is, as long as I can adapt to them.
    Interesting to hear this from a leader and worthy of discussion perhaps to see if you do mean style, or something more subtle.

    To me, one dancer can have lots of "styles", while still having lots of "style" .

    At my first non-Route 66 party last night ( *sweepingstatemet*R66 music, mostly falling into one or two particular "styles") with music from traditional 50s swing to chart with most thing inbetween - I was struck again by the fact that most dancers have a favourite style of music, or one that suits their dance style best......there are funky stylists that will always look, and feel best to dance with, to modern funky tracks, and some that look and feel best dancing to something slow, oldfashioned (not a derogatory term in ANY way) swingy, or rock n rolly.

    The BEST dancers, and there were a few in the room last night I can tell you, can adapt very well to the track playing and so have many "styles".

    So help us out with a definition of "style" in this context, do you actually mean that old topic of "dancing down" which is not IMHO quite the same as changing styles, but perhaps dancing without the bells and whistles perhaps?

    Is it more to do with "going for it" within the style the music dictates?

    Interested.

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    Re: Adapting to your partner

    Sometimes I dance with women who (non-verbally) reject my usual fairly light&ambiguous style of leading, because they prefer something stronger and clearer. Because they've chosen not to compromise their style of following (or only compromise halfway), it forces me to do the adapting. Challenging, but fun.

    It's also "dancing down", though. Some women don't do fancy stuff when dancing with someone new - they still have their style, but it's watered down and tame in comparison. That's cool, and probably sensible, but I think I prefer it when women don't do that filtering, or at least only do it when necessary.

    I was talking about that sort of thing, rather than style in the "swing" vs "smooth" vs "funky" vs "latin" vs "chart" vs ... sense.

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    Re: Adapting to your partner

    Quote Originally Posted by MartinHarper
    Sometimes I dance with women who (non-verbally) reject my usual fairly light&ambiguous style of leading, because they prefer something stronger and clearer.
    How do you know that it's not clearer that they want, rather than stronger as well?

    Why don't you try light and unambiguous?

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    Registered User El Salsero Gringo's Avatar
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    Re: Adapting to your partner

    Quote Originally Posted by ChrisA
    How do you know that it's not clearer that they want, rather than stronger as well?
    Why don't you try light and unambiguous?
    I'm sure that Martin didn't mean to say that he was being deliberately ambiguous as a style of leading (you're not *deliberately* misinterpreting him, are you Chris?) - perhaps he was meaning that a light lead allows the follower to wander off on their own more than a more forceful (stronger) lead from which some partners find easier to interpret his intentions?

    I much agree with what he says, by the way.

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    Formerly known as DavidJames David Bailey's Avatar
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    Re: Adapting to your partner

    Quote Originally Posted by MartinHarper
    Sometimes I dance with women who (non-verbally) reject my usual fairly light&ambiguous style of leading, because they prefer something stronger and clearer. Because they've chosen not to compromise their style of following (or only compromise halfway), it forces me to do the adapting. Challenging, but fun.
    You're a nicer person than me, I'd find that "challenging and not fun" - I just don't like having to do all the running in a dance, a 50-50 compromise just works better to me. Of course, if the styles are pretty compatible, there's no compromise involved, and the sky's the limit...
    to everything else though.

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