Forum Limericks

[Aleks]

Originally posted by Lory
There once was a girl called Rachel
who's big baggy knickers were hell
her boyfriend called Mark
kept his head in the dark
So Now she wears none I can tell

Good for her!

[CJ]

Do what you want with your limericks,
I'll tell you a tale about stones and sticks.
They make break a bone,
but my skills I shall hone.
I'm a songwriter doing it just for kicks.

[Dreadful Scathe]

There was a young lady called CJ
who fancied himself as a DJ
he'd play kylie and co.
the dance floor would grow
but the last song is always a replay



...did you see what i did there

er......heres one wot i wrote..


This dancer has a special skill
a leap, a lunge, a lovely twirl
when leading for that special song
they hope that they can do no wrong

the partner follows with growing joy
a picture face of sheer delight
the lower tempo, it was a ploy
the partners face looks up in fright

faster faster the tempo rises
dancing circles increase their sizes
the partner follows with trepidation
which plateaus out to true elation

upon the climax they stop, well spent
a musical freeze that was heaven sent
the crowds around cheer and shout
that was almost something to write home about




er..dodgy...
and, no..it is certainly not about MY dancing

[Sheepman]

Originally posted by ChrisA
. . .
It’s years before I’m that old.

You realise it doesn't scan or rhyme don't you??
And now you're not getting that "don't write a poem" fee, but Trampy gets his fee, I think I'm in love

Greg

[CJ]

5.9
5.9
6.0
5.9
3.2 (what can I say?? Was the Russian judge!!)

[TheTramp]

Originally posted by Sheepman
And now you're not getting that "don't write a poem" fee, but Trampy gets his fee, I think I'm in love

Awww

Steve

[ChrisA]

Originally posted by Sheepman

You realise it doesn't scan or rhyme don't you??

You have to read it carefully to make it scan, but what part of Sheepy/creepy, entranced/advanced, fold/old are you suggesting doesn't rhyme????

Old and deaf, I reckon.

[Lory]

There once was an old perv called Lurch
At hipsters is where he did perch
until Mr sheepy
Told old Mr Creepy
Lay off, or I'll give you the birch

[ChrisA]

Originally posted by Lory
There once was an old perv called Lurch
At hipsters is where he did perch
until Mr sheepy
Told old Mr Creepy
Lay off, or I'll give you the birch

[Divissima]

There once was a young man from Wembley
who'd attend any dancing assembly.
The ladies cried - "Will -
please give us a thrill
by making our knees go all trembly!"

-----------------
I thank you

[ChrisA]

Certain dancers quite expert at wiggling
Have been known to subdue with their wriggling
Now immune to their charms
I need sound no alarms
Because now it just makes me start giggling

[ChrisA]

Accusing our Nigel of mincing
Is not really all that convincing
With that hat on he’s sure
To get round the whole floor
With them all queuing up for his grincing

[Divissima]

There once was a young 'ster of cool
Who danced like a music-crazed fool
All sleaze he abhored
But wiggling adored
and danced all the way to Blackpool.


Not one of my better efforts, sorry

[Stuart M]

I know some MAd girls from Dundee
who're quite willing to jive, you should see.
They may not be drinkers,
but they'll show you their knickers,
if you're Franck, and it's your birthdee!

[Stuart M]

There once was a smurf called D Smurf
who smurfed quite a lot in the smurf
he smurfed at the smurf
and smurf smurfy smurf
smurf smurfy smurf smurfy smurf smurf...

[TheTramp]

Hmmm.

Don't give up the day job just yet Stuart

Steve

[bobgadjet]

A Forum Tramp named Steve
Plays tunes to enjoy, we believe
He'll have us all know
That Mavericks won't show
On a playlist from his PC


A Minnie from Brighton, we hear
Is always full of good cheer
She'll soon get a card
To make travel less hard
And certainly a lot less dear


Ashtons Blonde bomshell named Lory
Could well be a barmaid from Corrie
On reading this cr*p
Will dish out a slap
So now is the time I'll say Sorry


Maybe more soon, if I survive

[ChrisA]

A certain young dancer called Jayne
Had been up in Glasgow to train
Then southwards she came
In search of more fame
And Scotland’s loss was England’s gain

[Jayne]

Originally posted by ChrisA
A certain young dancer called Jayne
Had been up in Glasgow to train
Then southwards she came
In search of more fame
And Scotland’s loss was England’s gain

Woo hoo! A limerick with "Jayne" but not one reference to rain or pain! Well done that man!

J

[TheTramp]

Originally posted by ChrisA
A certain young dancer called Jayne
Had been up in Glasgow to train
Then southwards she came
In search of more fame
And Scotland’s loss was England’s gain

I refer the honourable gentleman to the picture, in the 4th post down, on this page...

http://www.cerocscotland.com/forum/s...0&pagenumber=4



Steve