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Thread: Self imposed dance policy's

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    Forum Bombshell - Our Queen! Lory's Avatar
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    Self imposed dance policy's

    Taken from the 'things that frustrate' thread

    Quote Originally Posted by robd View Post
    And as for the 'wishing they were somewhere else' brigade I operate a one strike policy. If it happens I never ask that person again. I can probably count on one hand the times I have applied this (though I suppose I don't do the asking very often) - sometimes they have subsequently asked me, sometimes not. There are plenty of people to dance with who do want to dance with me to bother worring about those who don't.
    I've got my own policy, I developed a while back, in which I'll only ask the same person to dance 3 times (not all on the same night obviously) and then I wait for them to ask me back. If they don't, I simply take it as a sign that they don't particularly enjoy dancing with me and with 'no hard feelings' I leave it there!
    If they ask me back.. GREAT

    Does anyone else have any 'self imposed dance policy's'?
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    Registered User Phil_dB's Avatar
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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by Lory View Post
    Taken from the 'things that frustrate' thread



    I've got my own policy, I developed a while back, in which I'll only ask the same person to dance 3 times (not all on the same night obviously) and then I wait for them to ask me back. If they don't, I simply take it as a sign that they don't particularly enjoy dancing with me and with 'no hard feelings' I leave it there!
    If they ask me back.. GREAT

    Does anyone else have any 'self imposed dance policy's'?
    Did you lose count on me?!

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    Registered User Phil_dB's Avatar
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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by Phil_dB View Post
    Did you lose count on me?!
    For the record, it wasn't because I didnt want to - I was simply slightly (probably stupidly) intimidated! Lory is a fantastic dancer & I didn't want to 'waste' her time when their were so many better dancers than me around! So never used to ask her back!

    As well as the same policy as Robd (!), - I also have the same policy as Lory (!). If I am the only one ever doing the asking, I can only end up presuming they don't enjoy dancing with me...

    Don't think I have any others!

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by Phil_dB View Post
    For the record, it wasn't because I didnt want to - I was simply slightly (probably stupidly) intimidated! Lory is a fantastic dancer & I didn't want to 'waste' her time when their were so many better dancers than me around! So never used to ask her back!

    As well as the same policy as Robd (!), - I also have the same policy as Lory (!). If I am the only one ever doing the asking, I can only end up presuming they don't enjoy dancing with me...

    Don't think I have any others!
    Maybe they're thinking the same about you that you used to think about Lory...

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by Lory View Post
    Taken from the 'things that frustrate' thread

    Does anyone else have any 'self imposed dance policy's'?
    Simples

    1) Dance with Lory as many times as I can before she gets fed up of me.
    2) Never say no, unless I am sprinting to the loo or grabbing a drink or promised some-one else a dance.
    3) Remember who has previously asked me and who I might have had to say no to and seek them out at the next opportunity.
    4) Raid the teachers, demos and good dancers as often as possible at weekenders
    5) Try to stop singing when dancing

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by Phil_dB View Post
    For the record, it wasn't because I didnt want to - I was simply slightly (probably stupidly) intimidated! Lory is a fantastic dancer & I didn't want to 'waste' her time when their were so many better dancers than me around! So never used to ask her back!



    !
    I would have to agree with that.
    I think there are one or two others on here that I would feel the same way.
    I know that some of you will come back and say what a load of tosh but whether you like it or not it is a fact.
    I realise that I should step back and address the problem but maybe one or two of you should perhaps do the same.

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by rtwwpad View Post
    Simples

    4) Raid the teachers, demos and good dancers as often as possible at weekenders
    Dont ask me to explain but there is something about that statement that makes me irritated.
    Don't tell me,you also get to the edge of the floor to make sure that everyone sees you and marvel at your moves(another of my irritations)

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    Registered User jive-vee's Avatar
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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by djtrev View Post
    Don't tell me,you also get to the edge of the floor to make sure that everyone sees you and marvel at your moves(another of my irritations)
    I like dancing near the edge of the floor but it's purely because there are fewer people that you have to worry about crashing into you. It's not a performance thing - preferably it'd be an edge furthest away from a crowd of onlookers.

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    I used to have a policy about who I asked to dance and would never ask anyone who refused me. I would respond to a refusal by saying "I'd love to dance with you, please come and ask me if you ever change your mind". And then I'd wait to be asked, never asking that person again. I waited for years with some ladies

    Nowadays I take the view that it's only dancing and I've only been refused a dance, not a kidney. I don't even bother to remember who refuses me. If I get time to do a second lap of the room I ask the refuser a second time. Do they say yes? I've no idea because I've already forgotten and forgiven the earlier refusal

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by jive-vee View Post
    I like dancing near the edge of the floor but it's purely because there are fewer people that you have to worry about crashing into you. It's not a performance thing - preferably it'd be an edge furthest away from a crowd of onlookers.
    I like to dance near the edge of the floor so people can see my performance - and I always smile towards the edge so the onlookers can't see my bald spot

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by Andy McGregor View Post
    I like to dance near the edge of the floor so people can see my performance - and I always smile towards the edge so the onlookers can't see my bald spot
    We have mirrors so we can see our own glowing smiles rather than waste them on lesser dancers, and so that our performance can be appreciated by the only people able to fully appreciate it - ourselves.

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    I dont ask again if I've been turned down, simply because I find it painfull to be turned down twice in a row, but if after being turned down I am asked by that woman for a dance, I put it down to paranoia and mentally put the woman on my safe not get a knock back off list. if I had an ask three times and wait for request back policy I'd never get a dance

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by Lory View Post
    Does anyone else have any 'self imposed dance policy's'?
    I don't know about dance policies, but I do have a policy to not use too many apostrophes .

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by rtwwpad View Post
    Simples

    1) Dance with Lory as many times as I can before she gets fed up of me.
    2) Never say no, unless I am sprinting to the loo or grabbing a drink or promised some-one else a dance.
    They seem like reasonable policies.
    3) Remember who has previously asked me and who I might have had to say no to and seek them out at the next opportunity.
    Good policy, but I'm too lazy to remember people and hunt them down.
    4) Raid the teachers, demos and good dancers as often as possible at weekenders
    You can keep the teachers and demos. In my experience, my chances of getting a nice dance don't increase just because I'm asking teachers and demos.
    Who the good dancers are is very subjective.
    5) Try to stop singing when dancing
    Errr, good luck with that.

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by Phil_dB View Post

    As well as the same policy as Robd (!), - I also have the same policy as Lory (!). If I am the only one ever doing the asking, I can only end up presuming they don't enjoy dancing with me...

    !
    Yep eventualy the penny drops with me too

    Quote Originally Posted by rtwwpad View Post
    5) Try to stop singing when dancing

    I do this and I do apologise as I am tone deaf but it just happens

    Oh yes one last thing, I never ask someone again who has turned me down, unless they have asked me to dance after that.
    Last edited by Maxine; 15th-April-2010 at 08:38 AM. Reason: forgetful

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by djtrev View Post
    I would have to agree with that.
    I think there are one or two others on here that I would feel the same way.
    I know that some of you will come back and say what a load of tosh but whether you like it or not it is a fact.
    I realise that I should step back and address the problem but maybe one or two of you should perhaps do the same.
    I've re-read your post a couple of times, - it's probably just me being stoopid again, - but I don't quite understand what you're saying?

    You say you agree with the way I felt, - but what are you saying about other people?

    My experience has nothing to do with anyone else's actions. I've found the vast majority of experienced dancers to be really friendly, - some people, both on & off this forum, have gone well out of their way to be friendly.
    My fear was a result of my own dancing insecurities.


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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by djtrev View Post
    Dont ask me to explain but there is something about that statement that makes me irritated.
    Don't tell me,you also get to the edge of the floor to make sure that everyone sees you and marvel at your moves(another of my irritations)
    No, go on explain it.

    Here's mine.

    One of the easiest ways to improve your dancing is to dance with better dancers. To save me the effort of prowling the floor etc. simply head for where the teachers are. They will usually be dancing with each other or their demos or some other adventurous types. Bingo. Easy resource to tap. I don't spend all my time there, but its an nice way to spend 30 minutes or so.

    Dance at the edge of the floor to show off? To who? And why? I dance because I enjoy it. Not that I think anyone wants to watch a stout balding welshman dance but sometimes the edges are not as crowded as the centre. Dancing is for me not others.

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by Gav View Post
    They seem like reasonable policies.


    Who the good dancers are is very subjective.
    I know if you're not careful you get a lindy hopper

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by rtwwpad View Post
    I know if you're not careful you get a lindy hopper
    You should be so lucky....

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    Re: Self imposed dance policy's

    Quote Originally Posted by rtwwpad View Post
    Dance at the edge of the floor to show off? To who? And why? I dance because I enjoy it. Not that I think anyone wants to watch a stout balding welshman dance but sometimes the edges are not as crowded as the centre. Dancing is for me not others.
    Joking aside, I don't dance at the edge of the floor to show off. I dance there for the same reasons as rt. That and the fact it's the first bit of dance floor you get to. Why look for another bit of floor when you're there already?

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