I am a female lead - i learnt to lead then later i started to taxi, so i had to learn to follow the beginner moves at ceroc. Then three years after starting to dance i decided to learn to follow. It is now not such a rare occurance, but there can still be evenings when i only follow once or twice a night.
I had a hideous experience at Berko once, and i since have refused to go back - I, as a lead, wanted to lead, and of all the people i asked to dance, there were 2 women who didn't refuse me. I had the worst night of dancing ever, and if it wasn't for the fact i was there with some friends who picked me back up again, i probably wouldn't have ventured out of my local venue ever again. (Glad you picked me up again Fletch)
However now when i dance - i ask people i don't know, as well those that i do, i probably ask people i don't know more at my local venues though. I am always surprised (in a good way) when a female (that i don't know) asks me to lead her, but i would never refuse them, and often i really enjoy dancing with these new people, it gives me an opportunity to ask them again when i next see them.
The only draw back of being a female lead in mho, is that men who "think" they can follow, or want to learn, ask you to lead them, then want you to tell them how brilliant they are. I have no issues helping people, and giving tips if they are asked for (not suggesting i am, or have ever been the fountain of all dance knowledge). But there is a time and a place, and if men want to learn to follow - they'd be better doing it the old fashion way, like the ladies!!! There are obviously men who are wonderful follows, who are fantastic fun to lead, and whom i seek out. However what frodo said works both ways!!
I am a lead - who since learnt to follow - i do not profess to be a follow - and certainly not an accomplished one If a man asks a female lead to dance, he should expect them to dance as a lead who may or may not follow fantastically. If the female lead turns out to be a brilliant follow as well - all the more fun!!!
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