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Thread: Highs & lows of dancing.

  1. #21
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    Re: Highs & lows of dancing.

    Inevitable part of dance life I'm afraid.

    I went through it really badly a while back when I ended up just taking soemthing like 4 months off dancing and going to the gym instead. When I came back, some of the joy was back for me.

    Arguably it could be even worse for the lead than the follows - I know that to "cheer up" my dancing, if I dance with a really nice dancer who I don't get to dance with regularly, then I'll feel more inspired (I'm not just going through the motions, but being challenged to follow properly with moves I'm not expecting). I suppose for the leads, you'll have less opportunity to be "surprised" this way

    Good luck getting over the down period, but I think it will be just a phase before you feel better!

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    Re: Highs & lows of dancing.

    It's the highs that make me try and make every dance as good as I can - the eternal quest to re-capture that dance: the one where all background noise faded away; every movement flowed between you as natural as breathing; every breath was inspired by the music; the dance lasted an eternity as the music flowed through you and was over in a heartbeat; the space on the dance floor opened for you to move and nothing passed from the muted dark blur into the patch of floor you illuminated; where you hold your partner for that extra few bars to steady yourself, grasp at the smoke of memory, and pull yourself back to "me" rather than "us"...

    It's a heady goal to reach for within every dance - but there is no dissapointment for not reaching it: just a brief glance with fingertips towards it can send the pixie dust into the dance. And this can keep the feet light, spirits high and remind you of what you're aiming for.

    Even the worst dances and worst dancers I am grateful for: without a contrast, then the "special" dance isn't special any more - it's average. Thinking on it, this is where I suppose most folk plateau out: no matter how good a dance is/was, it was similar to the last one. And lot of similar things get boring: You need to find some contrast. At the start the contrast is Dancing Vs not dancing. You have now lots of "dancing" experience, so the contrast has moved to listening for it in the music. As some folk have suggested - if you can't find it in the music, then turn the focus again to your dancing and add some contrast {styling} into it. I find that I bounce between the music and my dancing in search for contrast to keep me interested. I listen to/for different things in the music. I move & listen to my partner in different ways. Never boring, never bored, always dancing.

    This contrast helps improve my dancing and (I hope) brings me closer to that Utopian dance. Some beautiful partners have taken me to beautiful highs, but I can't really think on any true lows within my dancing... erm... other than when I've been arrogant, careless or stupid (mix & match) and hurt my partner.

  3. #23
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    Re: Highs & lows of dancing.

    Quote Originally Posted by Gadget View Post
    It's the highs that make me try and make every dance as good as I can - the eternal quest to re-capture that dance: the one where all background noise faded away; every movement flowed between you as natural as breathing; every breath was inspired by the music; the dance lasted an eternity as the music flowed through you and was over in a heartbeat; the space on the dance floor opened for you to move and nothing passed from the muted dark blur into the patch of floor you illuminated; where you hold your partner for that extra few bars to steady yourself, grasp at the smoke of memory, and pull yourself back to "me" rather than "us"...

    It's a heady goal to reach for within every dance - but there is no dissapointment for not reaching it: just a brief glance with fingertips towards it can send the pixie dust into the dance. And this can keep the feet light, spirits high and remind you of what you're aiming for.

    Even the worst dances and worst dancers I am grateful for: without a contrast, then the "special" dance isn't special any more - it's average. Thinking on it, this is where I suppose most folk plateau out: no matter how good a dance is/was, it was similar to the last one. And lot of similar things get boring: You need to find some contrast. At the start the contrast is Dancing Vs not dancing. You have now lots of "dancing" experience, so the contrast has moved to listening for it in the music. As some folk have suggested - if you can't find it in the music, then turn the focus again to your dancing and add some contrast {styling} into it. I find that I bounce between the music and my dancing in search for contrast to keep me interested. I listen to/for different things in the music. I move & listen to my partner in different ways. Never boring, never bored, always dancing. waycool:

    This contrast helps improve my dancing and (I hope) brings me closer to that Utopian dance. Some beautiful partners have taken me to beautiful highs, flower: love: but I can't really think on any true lows within my dancing... erm... other than when I've been arrogant, careless or stupid (mix & match) and hurt my partner.

    Oh WOW!

    How powerful is that...?

    I always wondered why you are never off the floor, but I should have realised .... After all so many of your followers wander off the floor in a happy daze...

    So now we know the secret.

    I just hope I'm not one of your worst

    WT

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    Re: Highs & lows of dancing.

    I think that we all suffer from the highs and lows, it's just that some people are more susceptible to being knocked off the high than others.

    When I started thinking about dancing 'musically' I found myself having very different nights depending on whether I felt inspired by the music. Some nights I moped around and hardly danced at all, often surrounded by other 'musicality newbies'.

    Now I take a different approach when I go out an even if I turn up at a 'normal' MJ night complete with thumping beats I go all out to dance musically and extract every nuance I can from the music. Like Gadget says the aim is to try to make every dance special and seek inspiration in yourself, your partner and the music in different amounts depending on the individual dance concerned. I guess that what I've done is use this approach to extend my own plateau so it's harder for me to drop off, but even now that does sometimes happen.

    The other thing I do is to seek out venues where I know the music will be more 'interesting' although this is largely trial and error initially until you build up a list of places/organisers/DJs that float your boat. I'm lucky that my local independent venue is one such place so I don't need to travel too far but such places exist all over the country.

    Agent 000
    Licnsed to Dance

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    Re: Highs & lows of dancing.

    As others are saying, most of us get this to some extent.

    One thing that I've found helps me, is simply to say: "I may not have been dancing as well as I'd like tonight.... but two years ago, had I danced like this, I'd have been over the moon. This is how much I've improved."



    Quote Originally Posted by Phil_dB View Post
    When I don’t like the music I feel completely uninspired. Uninspired to the extent that I really don’t even feel like dancing at all. The last three nights that i’ve been out dancing have all been ‘off nights’ - I haven’t enjoyed most of the music that was played, and have found myself sitting out watching much more than is usual (typically in the past i’d hardly be off the floor all night). When i’m not enjoying the music I feel my dancing has deteriorated! I can’t quite put my finger on it, - but I just think that nothing flows as well, - just doesn’t feel right. .
    I can identify with this. I remember one night (many years ago) where I had exactly one dance, because I could not stand the music - and that dance was to a track that at any other venue, I'd have sat out for.... but on this occasion, it was the best track of the night. My then partner told me I was a music snob, and I dare say she was right. I still am.

    If you choose not to dance much, because you don't like the music, the thing to do is to acknowledge that it's your choice, and be OK with that. If you sit there feeling that you're missing out, you'll have a wretched time - so either dance and make the best of it, or don't dance, and be OK about it. Neither choice is wrong, IMO.

  6. #26
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    Re: Highs & lows of dancing.

    Fantastic posting - great to read, thanks everyone. Some very positive suggestions (of which i've taken on board), and alternative ways of looking at things which have already helped me to keep positive (during time when dancing to a dodgy track, or with a dodgy partner! ) - many thanks again

    I had a brilliant night last night! It helped that there was 200+ in attendance and the DJ played some lovely music, - - although at the beginning the music was hit & miss but I just ploughed on through it - if I wasn't keen on the music I was focusing my attention more on many other things - as suggested above.. - by the time the good tracks came on I felt well warmed up & danced much better to them as a result instead of coming in cold... - - so many lovely dancers/people around last night - still buzzing this morning!


    Quote Originally Posted by Princess Fi View Post
    Inevitable part of dance life I'm afraid.

    I went through it really badly a while back when I ended up just taking soemthing like 4 months off dancing and going to the gym instead. When I came back, some of the joy was back for me.

    Arguably it could be even worse for the lead than the follows - I know that to "cheer up" my dancing, if I dance with a really nice dancer who I don't get to dance with regularly, then I'll feel more inspired (I'm not just going through the motions, but being challenged to follow properly with moves I'm not expecting). I suppose for the leads, you'll have less opportunity to be "surprised" this way

    Good luck getting over the down period, but I think it will be just a phase before you feel better!
    What made you give up for 4 months if you don't mind me asking?

    Yes, I see what you mean about being suprised. I guess leads just need to look at different things to keep our interest (style, footwork, moves, partner-focus etc etc - as suggested in this thread ^^^) (stands to reason given that lead & follow are different skillsets?), - example last night before going out I watched/remembered a couple of new moves from youtube/DVDs, which I put into practice last night during freestyle, - nice couple of moves which felt good, - just an extra little something to add interest, satifsying to pull something off from watching, &, something else to stick in the repotoire bag.
    Last edited by Phil_dB; 19th-August-2009 at 10:47 AM.

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    Re: Highs & lows of dancing.

    Quote Originally Posted by Phil_dB View Post
    What made you give up for 4 months if you don't mind me asking?
    It was just that sense of frustration to be honest. I would go along to my venue which was filled with lovely dancers and just think “I’m actually not fussed if I don’t dance tonight.” I wasn’t “learning” so to speak - I was competent at following what the local people were leading, but just not inspired to do that much other than go through the motions.

    This is not a reflection of my opinion of the people I was dancing with – just a comment on where my head was at. I wanted to get better as a dancer, but just felt that I had stalled, and wasn’t motivated to get myself out of that mindset. By comparison there were other areas of my life I was motivated to focus on (hence going to the gym a lot instead)

    After a certain amount of time the lethargy went away, I came back to dancing and felt better with it. Now the problem is I would rather go dancing all the time than go to the gym! :s

    Going to different venues has helped me a lot in that different geographies dance in different ways – different moves are taught, different music is played etc, so it gave me lots to work with/on. And it always brings a smile to my face when leading something back home which I’ve picked up from another venue, which causes my partners eyebrows to raise in surprise. (I’m assuming it’s good surprise rather than bad). Similarly, following different moves gave me the opportunity to respond in different ways as a follow, develop different style points which I could take into the rest of my dancing

    But that’s just life from my little corner of it

  8. #28
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    Re: Highs & lows of dancing.

    Ah, I see. Thanks for sharing, its interesting to hear what others go through.

    When you were at your unmotivated plateau, I would imagine your frame of mind was reflected in your dancing..? I'm pretty sure that mine was, - I look back & wonder what i was like to dance with!? Eeek!

    Dancing is my highest priority but I still manage to visit the gym as much as I dance (can't break the habit of a lifetime!), - I'm lucky that I can fit a workout into my lunch-hour.. - as it frees u my evenings


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    Re: Highs & lows of dancing.

    Nice one Phil - really cool to hear that some comments made on here have helped and that you had such a great nights dancing with a positive mindset... Really hope this is a corner for you and you can keep enjoying your dance on all levels.

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    Re: Highs & lows of dancing.

    Good thread, my general thought which might help someone is:


    Too much of anything can make you sick. So try to find your 'over dose level'. -Mines 3-4 nights a week.


    Maybe take a break.

    Many ballroom dances shut down for the summer season and then restart in september. It's not a bad idea, take a break, give yourself a chance to miss it.

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