Ali Bastian – Brian Fortuna
Lynda Bellingham – Darren Bennett
Natalie Cassidy – Vincent Simone
Martina Hingis - Matthew Cutler
Jade Johnson – Ian Waite
Zoe Lucker – James Jordan
Laila Rouass - Anton Du Beke
Jo Wood – Brendan Cole
Joe Calzaghe – Kristina Rihanoff
Richard Dunwoody – Lilia Kopylova
Ricky Groves - Erin Boag
Chris Hollins – Ola Jordan
Craig Kelly – Flavia Cacace
Phil Tufnell - Katya Virshilas
Ricky Whittle – Natalie Low
Rav Wilding – Aliona Vilani
Just to finish off the deconstruction of the double entendre......an interesting aspect is how this is delivered if you actually say the words out loud.
First, try saying:
"Marks out of ten? I'd give her* one" - as if you were a judge on the show.
Then, try saying
"Marks out of ten? I'd give her* one" - as if you were Trousers or Double Trouble talking about providing a suitable sexual experience to the person being judged.
How does it sound to you? What are the differences?
* Please substitute 'him' as appropriate.
Poor Alesha!
She doesn't deserve all the grief she is getting about being one of the judges!
Remember its not a strict dance contest - more of a popularity contest at times. She won the thing for goodness sake, if that doesn't make you qualified, lord knows what does!
When the competition heats up and gets to the sharp end, there is Darcey Bussell coming in. That should be enough surely to satisfy judging credentials!
Overall - like the new format, the times are crap though! people are known to go out on Fridays and Sat nights
...oh and the new girls are hot!
Cheers
Martin
While I thought there were a lot of choices of people the BBC could have put in as a replacement judge (if they felt they really needed to remove Arlene), I was prepared to wait and see what she said. So far she has hardly made any relevant comments related to the dancing, I think the only thing aside from 'you had fun' 'its tough getting up there and dancing' type comments was a few comments about arms.
The judges are there to offer comments and marks based on dance performance and skill. The public then votes based on popularity and who they like best. Alesha would work well as say an ITT 'commentator' on the dances, but as a dance judge, she just seems hopelessly out of her depth.
For a more than mildly entertaining, and very in depth review of the first show, I recommend this:
http://monkseal.wordpress.com/2009/0...pt1/#more-1934
- with stills of key points and detailed analysis of judges comments.......put together in a humorous, modern Hollywood Babylon-esque meets Nicholson Baker style of writing.
Hat tip to David Bailey for this.
It even describes and shows the still from the moment this bloke (with mini dreads) appeared on screen (was he a sound engineer?) for no reason.......I wondered at the time who he was/what he was doing.
That was brilliant
I especially liked this quote
"Given that I imagine Erin’s idea of romance to be bringing down a gazelle and stripping it to the bone in 30 seconds"
"If you rebel against high heels, take care to do so in a very smart hat.'' George Bernard Shaw
"They’re dancing to “Reach Out And Touch Someone” and I feel it’s only fair to say at this point that my evaluation of this performance is negatively influenced by the fact that the female singer sounds like she’s trying to **** out a kidney stone"
Comedy genius.... have tears streaming dpown my face... I can baRE;Y TYPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Last edited by CJ; 24th-September-2009 at 11:30 AM. Reason: decided not to edit in deference to review and how seriously funny it is
Erin “Don’t Just Stand There, Let’s Get To It, Strike A Pose, There’s Nothing To It” Boag
Absolute genius...I really struggled not to fall off my chair laughing at lots of it, but particularly this...
seriously, seriously hilariousAnyway Ali Bastian enters to the strains of “Girls” by The Sugababes, basically looking like Paris Hilton, except good-looking and not like a wonk-eyed velociraptor.
Len does a bit of a sex wee at the prospect of the BLOKINESS to ensue.
I was thinking that maybe Alesha, although a bit lacking in technical comments on dancing, wasn't so very bad compared to some of the other judges' comments. Then I read this by Monkseal:
"Do you think when people complained about how much more obviously vapid Alesha was than the other judges they actually listened to some of the things that Len comes out with? “It was **** but it made me smile” wouldn’t really pass muster in a proper dance competition, like everyone’s apparently still deluding themselves this is.
Of course, then Alesha calls it the most entertaining dance of the night so far and says that Ricky should get points for just wearing pink, so as much as I want to try to defend her…I really can’t."
Having watched Alesha again tonight, I've come to the conclusion that the BBC are doing a PC box ticking exercise. In fact the box ticking team could take the rest of the year off if they could just convince us that Alesha was a lesbian and needed a wheelchair on weekends and Bank Holidays.
It's "Lenny Henry" syndrome all over again.
Yawn, yawn, YAWN!
Anton looked like the cat who got the cream! Finally he has a partner who can actually dance! I thought they were the best tonight, actually.
I think the judges were watching a totally different dance to me when Phil Tufnell came on. Are they all cricket fans or something? No way did he deserve such a high score IMO.
I found Brucie's defence of Alesha to be quite embarrassing, to be honest. It would have been better (and more professional) if he hadn't mentioned the criticism she's been getting. As it was, he just drew attention to it rather than to her. I'm no Alesha fan myself, but that just wasn't the right time or place for that particular debate to be continued.
I enjoyed last night’s strictly so much more than the previous week and I think the standard of dancing was definitely higher.
May favourite was still Ricky Whittle as I mentioned last week, really think he is the one to watch followed by Anton’s Partner.
Lastly I thought that Natalie Cassidy gave a good performance, she is probably not the best dancer but she acted her way through it so I hope she makes it through.
Maybe part of the reason Phil scored highly was out of expectation - everyone thought he'd be a joker.
I think Ricky felt the pressure last night, its must be horrible when everyone is expecting so much from you - some critics were saying that he might be the first person in Strictly to receive a 10 in the first dance. I think he'll be pleased to get the first one out the way, I reckon he'll relax a bit more as time goes on ,.. - then we can see what he can really do
Good point DS. I think that it is easy to forget that SCD is light entertainment based (sometimes loosely) on a dance theme - it's not a serious dance programme and frankly even the so called professional judges often argue with each other in their inspired assessments. I don't see any reason why Alesha can't contribute to that entertainment factor once she's found her feet a bit - she's definitely going to be more entertaining than Brucie.
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