So, I'm standing and watching the dancing this evening, and there is a couple doing some tango moves. I turn to the guy next to me and say (cos, as everyone kno, I am a witty bloke) "D'you think that bloke knows his partner is polishing her shoes on his trousers?"
Said guy turns to me and says: "No, it's tango - they're dancing tango."
Not always. I was once listening to the host at a party I attended, giving me the blow by blow account of all the various accidents his cat had (barely) survived - the last of which had cost the poor thing one hind leg and its tail - and what those accidents had cost his insurance company. Feeling that the 'Is he called "Lucky"?" joke wasn't going to be well received, I merely commented that I assumed the cat had lost its no-claims bonus, only to have him explain in depth why it was not possible to obtain a no-claims bonus on a household pet. Hmmm.
I made the mistake of telling a cashier that I had a complaint. "It says these are man size tissues, well I'm this big, and they are only this big." In a panic she said she'd call the manager ...
A motorist stopped and asked me for directions to Cedar Rd. It was 50 yard behind him. I said "You don't have to go anywhere, you can see da road from here." He said very funny, and drove off with me vainly pointing the way.
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