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Thread: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

  1. #21
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Why anyone would prefer the old DTS is beyond me.
    The new DTS tries to enjoy life to the full and tries to be happy, pleasant and friendly at all times.

    The old me was aggressive bitchy and a bit of a tw*t really. So I shall have to dissapoint young Shaun and endeavor to be the new, improved and nicer me.

    Many thanks for your support Georgious one, it is allways a pleasure seeing you, and dancing with you is allways a real treat.

  2. #22
    Registered User Batgirl's Avatar
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by dave the scaffolder View Post
    Why anyone would prefer the old DTS is beyond me.
    The new DTS tries to enjoy life to the full and tries to be happy, pleasant and friendly at all times.

    The old me was aggressive bitchy and a bit of a tw*t really. So I shall have to dissapoint young Shaun and endeavor to be the new, improved and nicer me.
    I didn't really know the old DTS but am quite liking the new one .

    Rachel
    xxx

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    Registered User Easily Led's Avatar
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    I too want to leap to DTS's defence , just the thought of him is enough to make me smile . He is one of the people I most look forward to dancing with (although each one is a challenge in a different way!). He is unfailingly the same with everyone from dance goddess to complete beginner and appears to enjoy them all equally (and leave them all smiling). He has the ability to be cheeky and sexy without ever being sleazy (even when simulating sex !). Surely this is what dancing is all about - having fun, breaking rules and making the person you dance with feel better than they did before (not worse or indifferent). I have always been too shy to flirt but people like DTS have encouraged me to do so in my dancing without feeling stupid or outrageous. I think there is a tendency in this country to associate dancing with sticking to rules and technique and obedience rather than wildness and fun. Surely all dances started with people wanting to celebrate rather than judge?

    Long live DTS (as he is) x
    Last edited by Easily Led; 19th-October-2008 at 11:27 AM. Reason: oops American spelling!

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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Easily Led View Post
    I too want to leap to DTS's defence , just the thought of him is enough to make me smile . He is one of the people I most look forward to dancing with (although each one is a challenge in a different way!). He is unfailingly the same with everyone from dance goddess to complete beginner and appears to enjoy them all equally (and leave them all smiling). He has the ability to be cheeky and sexy without ever being sleazy (even when simulating sex !). Surely this is what dancing is all about - having fun, breaking rules and making the person you dance with feel better than they did before (not worse or indifferent). I have always been too shy to flirt but people like DTS have encouraged me to do so in my dancing without feeling stupid or outrageous. I think there is a tendency in this country to associate dancing with sticking to rules and technique and obedience rather than wildness and fun. Surely all dances started with people wanting to celebrate rather than judge?

    Long live DTS (as he is) x
    I go to a dance night to enjoy myself and hopefully that helps others I dance with enjoy dancing with me. I usually ask strangers to dance, I never refuse a dance and I always enjoy a bit of wildness and fun. You certainly always get that with DTS I agree with you there EL, I don’t think I have ever had a dull dance with DTS and the new added bonus is that when you start a dance with DTS you never know who you’re going to finish up with!!! (male or female)
    So don't ever change DTS there is more than enough blandness in the world

  5. #25
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Oh girls what can I say...I am thinking of running for President here.
    Many many thanks I will now try to get me expanded head and ego into the kitchen for one of me famous DTS breakfasts.

  6. #26
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by dave the scaffolder View Post
    Oh girls what can I say...I am thinking of running for President here.
    Many many thanks I will now try to get me expanded head and ego into the kitchen for one of me famous DTS breakfasts.
    NOT lamb stew

  7. #27
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Maxine View Post
    NOT lamb stew


    Rachel
    xxx

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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by dave the scaffolder View Post
    I will pledge that I will never refuse a dance, unless toilet etc is a calling, and will do my best to get rid of this clique feeling that some people have raised as an issue.

    I will pledge to dance with at least 3 people I have never danced with at every dance I attend.

    I will pledge to endeavor to spread nothing but happiness and love in this hobby that I adore so much.
    Who is with me?
    You mean you haven't been doing this all along?

    Practically speaking, I don't think this is always really feasible. You are still going to turn down dances if toilets etc call, which will be felt as a rejection by those on the receiving end, but can't be helped. It's everyone's prerogative to be able to say no as a last resort but as long as it's only a tiny proportion of overall dances it's probably not a problem.

    I would have thought that, particularly as a bloke, it would be difficult to AVOID dancing with three new people a night unless you have a policy of turning down random predatory women who may ask you. Heck, even I probably get asked by three strangers per evening. To make any real impact on the sprinkling of dance-joy fairy dust I think you would have to up that target to at least 15 new ladies per evening, hopefully more.

    TSH - I've always had lots of fun dancing with you, you certainly don't need to follow the flock!

  9. #29
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by jivecat View Post
    You mean you haven't been doing this all along?
    My point exactly. What use is compulsion?

  10. #30
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by dave the scaffolder View Post
    I will pledge that I will never refuse a dance, unless toilet etc is a calling, and will do my best to get rid of this clique feeling that some people have raised as an issue.

    I will pledge to dance with at least 3 people I have never danced with at every dance I attend.

    I will pledge to endeavor to spread nothing but happiness and love in this hobby that I adore so much.
    Who is with me?

    Any more pledges are welcome.

    Let us try to make this hobby of our's non intimidating to newcomers, and if we see someone being uncomfortable lets do our best to make them feel welcome and secure in our world of dance.

    I will do this from now on to the best of my ability, either as a lone crusader or part of a, improve the image of dance community.

    If it takes off we can have badges and stuff made. (joke), but you get my drift sport fans.
    Excellent stuff DTS - an easy pledge to make as I have never refused a dance and never will, and exceed the 3 new people quota each time, I have never said anything negative during or after a dance, and always try and say something positive even if they were terrible !

  11. #31
    Registered User Twirly's Avatar
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    DTS – admire the spirit of this thread immensely, particularly after some of the recent shenanigans on here. And I’ll join with the other girls in saying that you’re one of the most fun dancers I’ve ever had the pleasure of dancing with.

    But I also sort of agree with jivecat and tsh… this is the sort of thing I’ve been doing since I started dancing, and I though that most people did, both here on the forum, and out there IRL Certainly if they hadn’t, I doubt that I’d be dancing now. Whilst I might not do exactly what you’re proposing in terms of numbers, I do ask both newbies to dance and strangers at most classes and freestyles I go to. In fact, asking strangers to dance became a personal goal for me at one time, as I found it quite tough to do. These things get easier with practice though, and I hardly bat an eyelid these days

    Having said that, there are a couple of people out there whom I don’t like dancing with, and try to avoid being asked by them (or ask them to take the gloves off ). Unlike Fletch I haven’t told them why I don’t want to dance with them as I don’t want to risk offending them, or put them off dancing, as others may not have the same issues with them that I do. I’m working on not feeling guilty about avoiding putting myself in situations in which I’m not comfortable. I suspect that a few more women need to do this as well, so pledging to always say yes could actually be quite damaging to them.

    As I said, I admire the spirit of this thread, however sadly, I don’t think that those folks who are known refusers to anyone they deem below their level are likely to take this up. And those are the people who cause the damage to others and the dance community

  12. #32
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by marcusj View Post
    Excellent stuff DTS - an easy pledge to make as I have never refused a dance and never will, and exceed the 3 new people quota each time, I have never said anything negative during or after a dance, and always try and say something positive even if they were terrible !
    I can vouch for that - I have danced REALLY badly with Marcus at times and he is always a real sweetie - even when I stomp on his feet or 'sabotage' his best moves!

    He is also patient with my terror of dips and drops as well.

    Thanks!

    Rachel
    xxxx

  13. #33
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by dave the scaffolder View Post
    I will pledge that I will never refuse a dance, unless toilet etc is a calling,
    I pledge never to refuse a dance, unless I don't want to dance with the person asking, for whatever reason. If I say yes, therefore, you'll know it's because I want to dance with you, and I'm not just being polite.

    Quote Originally Posted by dave the scaffolder View Post
    and will do my best to get rid of this clique feeling that some people have raised as an issue.
    I pledge to always take the p1ss out of these groups, thus ensuring they don't take themselves too seriously and start wearing silly badges, T-shirts, hats or other novelty accessory.

    Quote Originally Posted by dave the scaffolder View Post
    I will pledge to dance with at least 3 people I have never danced with at every dance I attend.
    I will pledge to choose to dance with whoever I want, being as I'm a paying punter not a taxi dancer. And again, the people I ask to dance will know that I want to dance with them.

    Quote Originally Posted by dave the scaffolder View Post
    I will pledge to endeavor to spread nothing but happiness and love in this hobby that I adore so much.
    I will also do this, but in my own special way

    So... how'd I do?

  14. #34
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by jivecat View Post
    I would have thought that, particularly as a bloke, it would be difficult to AVOID dancing with three new people a night unless you have a policy of turning down random predatory women who may ask you.
    Actually, I reckon I get asked less now by strangers than I did 10 years ago.

    Funny that Of course, it could be that I'm now 10 years older and uglier...

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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Batgirl View Post
    I can vouch for that - I have danced REALLY badly with Marcus at times and he is always a real sweetie - even when I stomp on his feet or 'sabotage' his best moves!

    He is also patient with my terror of dips and drops as well.

    Thanks!

    Rachel
    xxxx
    Someone's fishing for compliments ! You have never danced badly with me young Batgirl, in fact when we went to the Letchworth freestyle a few weeks ago I got a v nice compliment from someone about our dancing who thought we were proper dance partners.

    When you say 'sabotage' do you mean take over the lead and make me your bit*ch temporarily, or just f**k it up ??!!

    Mx

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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Bailey your in my son! Nice to have you on board.

    As for the people who have posted on here not wanting to Pledge....Then dont, it's a bit of happy and welcoming spirit Pledge. Thats all it is pips, if you dont want to do it.. Dont.

    Most people are welcoming and happy anyway, all I am trying to do is make people feel happier and more secure in the dance environment.

    It's not real life you know, it is only dancing. a hobby. No more or no less.

  17. #37
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Georgious dancer View Post
    I really love the idea of this pledge and there is part of me that really wants to join you in this. However I'm not sure I am in the right place emotionally to be able to.
    Only you know what is best for you honey. Just want to say that you are a beautiful person and a beautiful dancer. Anyone would love dancing with you.

    I did.

    Quote Originally Posted by frodo View Post
    I really hope not many (followers at least) sign up to this.

    If it was never refuse a dance with a beginner that would be better.
    Eh? I don't understand that. So are you saying that followers should say no to experienced leads?

    Quote Originally Posted by Twirly View Post

    As I said, I admire the spirit of this thread, however sadly, I don’t think that those folks who are known refusers to anyone they deem below their level are likely to take this up. And those are the people who cause the damage to others and the dance community
    Is this really a problem? How many people do you know that are serial refusers? I know of one. I wonder if it's more a problem of people thinking they are refusers so don't ask them for fear of rejection. Dunno. Just a thought.

  18. #38
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Twirlie Bird View Post
    Is this really a problem? How many people do you know that are serial refusers? I know of one. I wonder if it's more a problem of people thinking they are refusers so don't ask them for fear of rejection. Dunno. Just a thought.
    Not for me specifically. Was just a general thought in the terms of DTS's thread and the effect he was presumably trying to have.

    Personally, I have never asked the one person to turn me down rudely again. There are some people whom I see around but I don't ask, but that's because they always seem far too busy dancing in within their own group, and although I feel a bit disappointed about that if there's a shortage of men that night, it's their perogative. I don't know if they are serial refusers or not - can't be bothered to find out!

  19. #39
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by frodo View Post
    I really hope not many (followers at least) sign up to this.

    If it was never refuse a dance with a beginner that would be better.
    Quote Originally Posted by Twirlie Bird View Post
    Eh? I don't understand that. So are you saying that followers should say no to experienced leads?
    It most situations it is unlikely saying no to an experienced lead, is going to matter much.

    In most cases I don't want to dance with a lady who doesn't want to dance with me. It isn't any fun.

    In particular if a lady is particularly tired, or her feet are hurting, but says yes so as not to refuse.

  20. #40
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    Re: Join me in a pledge!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by dave the scaffolder View Post
    I will pledge that I will never refuse a dance
    One problem with this, is you've taken discrimination on who you dance with out of your hands.

    Ladies, who rush to ask you with always get dances, knowing you're not going to refuse, but you're less likely to get the opportunity to ask others.

    So ladies who don't rush will much of the time lose out.

    It may well be that dancing more with ladies other than those who rush to ask you would have a greater overall positive effect.

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