What do you ladies REALLY think?

[dave the scaffolder]

Oh no, I'm having a horrible mental picture


You mean, like a Budda?

Oh I say Lory my stunning weight loss means I am now into a size 32 inch jeans.

DTS XXX XXX

[fletch]

You mean, like a Budda?

yes...... some think like that


there's an idea....DTS have you got your outfit for Midnight at the oasis?

a nice harry krishna robe and a couple on them finger simbles, I can see you shimming around the floor, clinking away on them

[fletch]

Oh I say Lory my stunning weight loss means I am now into a size 32 inch jeans.

DTS XXX XXX

is that the inside leg ?


























only joking

[dave the scaffolder]

is that the inside leg ?

only joking

Oh I say I wish
DTS XX XXX

[fletch]

Oh I say I wish
DTS XX XXX

not your 3rd leg

[Daisy Chain]

So come on ladies, be honest, what do you really think about dancing with newbies and less competent dancers?

I don't mind at all, as long as I don't get Newbies and Incompetents all night.

Mind you, some Newbies are a pleasure. They may not know many moves, but they haven't had time to learn any bad habits. As for The Incompetents, they may change into absolute stars and might actually choose to dance with me in years to come.

Daisy

(An Accommodating Little FLower)

[whitetiger1518]

I totally agree with all of this (apart from the unbidden images - thank you DTS! ).

I have had trouble in the past getting good newbies to understand the fewer good moves rather than more bad moves idea.

However I will happily dance with a guy who has 1 or 2 moves, if he has (even the beginnings of) musicality, gentlemanly behaviour, and a bit of eye contact. ( A smile never hurt either )

Whitetiger

[Maxine]

So come on ladies, be honest, what do you really think about dancing with newbies and less competent dancers?

I would rather dance with someone who is new but friendly and pleasant, than someone who is a good dancer but makes no effort to connect with you.

I personally find that complicated moves do not necessarily make a great dance; my favourite dances are with the guys I feel I have connected with, who make eye contact and most importantly smile.

I have only ever refused a dance a couple of times and that was nothing to do with the dance but personal hygiene

[StokeBloke]

I would rather dance with someone who is new but friendly and pleasant, than someone who is a good dancer but makes no effort to connect with you.

I totally get your points Maxine, but can I just say that someone who doesn't make an effort to connect with their partner is NOT a 'good' dancer. Pedantic, but important

[Maxine]

I totally get your points Maxine, but can I just say that someone who doesn't make an effort to connect with their partner is NOT a 'good' dancer. Pedantic, but important

Don't worry Stokebloke I'm used to pedantic by now

What I mean by good dancer is technically good, which looks very good to a newish dancer but what I found is that as my confidence grew I became more discerning and realised what mattered.

[marko]

Hey All
Thanks for the feedback to this post.

As always DTS was as profound as ever! :respek:
I appreciate the comments about taking it easy and just letting it happen. Funny though how those who are blessed are often the ones saying that it doesnt matter . How many times have you heard someone who is minted say that money isnt important?

Same for me with the dancing thing. DTS is a great dancer and has to fight the ladies off with a stick. I guess I would just like to understand how the 'journey' to get to that level happened. I love dancing but have to say it has been one of the hardest things I have ever taken on (for many reasons (technical, social, schedule etc) and I find it as frustrating as hell that some nights my mind is like a goldfish (oh no not another first move!) then others it just clicks and it feels great. Have other guys been through this too? How did you get past that block and how long did it take.

In the meantime I just keep showering, dancing, smiling, changing my shirt and having fun. Hopefully the ladies I dance with will too. (have fun that is)

Peace
MarkO

[dave the scaffolder]

Hey All
Thanks for the feedback to this post.

As always DTS was as profound as ever! :respek:
I appreciate the comments about taking it easy and just letting it happen. Funny though how those who are blessed are often the ones saying that it doesnt matter . How many times have you heard someone who is minted say that money isnt important?

Same for me with the dancing thing. DTS is a great dancer and has to fight the ladies off with a stick. I guess I would just like to understand how the 'journey' to get to that level happened. I love dancing but have to say it has been one of the hardest things I have ever taken on (for many reasons (technical, social, schedule etc) and I find it as frustrating as hell that some nights my mind is like a goldfish (oh no not another first move!) then others it just clicks and it feels great. Have other guys been through this too? How did you get past that block and how long did it take.

In the meantime I just keep showering, dancing, smiling, changing my shirt and having fun. Hopefully the ladies I dance with will too. (have fun that is)

Peace
MarkO

Marko my lover, thanks for the comments indeed. Dancing is a journey it takes a bit of time to get ok at it, but on the journey revel in the process, make it a pleasant journey, knowing that on the way knock backs will occur.

It is better to relax and enjoy the journey than be all stressed and anxious.

Stressed and anxious will show in your dancing. Relaxed and happy will shine thro a lot better.
I describe the dancing journey as climbing stairs.

Up a bit then level out to consolidate what you have learned, always get the basics right because it all stems from the basics, nail the basics as an absolute must. When the basics are nailed then, and only then, move up a bit more.

DTS XX XX

[robd]

I totally get your points Maxine, but can I just say that someone who doesn't make an effort to connect with their partner is NOT a 'good' dancer. Pedantic, but important

I would say that such a person could be considered a 'good' dancer - technique, musical interpretation, blah, blah - but would not be a 'good' partner.

Same for me with the dancing thing. DTS is a great dancer and has to fight the ladies off with a stick. I guess I would just like to understand how the 'journey' to get to that level happened. I love dancing but have to say it has been one of the hardest things I have ever taken on (for many reasons (technical, social, schedule etc) and I find it as frustrating as hell that some nights my mind is like a goldfish (oh no not another first move!) then others it just clicks and it feels great. Have other guys been through this too? How did you get past that block and how long did it take.

In the meantime I just keep showering, dancing, smiling, changing my shirt and having fun. Hopefully the ladies I dance with will too. (have fun that is)

Is it just me for whom the words 'DTS' and 'stick' give me a mental image of Captain Caveman dragging women around by their hair?

Stick with it Marko. I started 3.5 years ago and I still remember well the times when everything I led from a L/R hold was a first move and everything R/R was a yo-yo. I was certain the followers were bored stiff with that limited repertoire, I certainly was, but gradually you pick up more variety and you'll add and drop things to your repertoire as you go along. And no matter how experienced, comfortable and 'good' you become you *never* feel like you have enough variety in your moves toolbox

I don't think there's a secret fast track to getting past it. For sure, you could take many private lessons, workshops, etc and attend as many freestyles as possible but chances are you'll remain frustrated as there's only so much you can take in at a time. If my personal experience is anything to go by you will also find that your dancing compatibility with people changes over time.

[Gerry]

Hey All
Thanks for the feedback to this post.

I find it as frustrating as hell that some nights my mind is like a goldfish (oh no not another first move!) then others it just clicks and it feels great. Have other guys been through this too? How did you get past that block and how long did it take.

MarkO

Hi
When I started dancing eight years ago, I found everything so difficult, I couldn't remember moves and I was a totally mess with TWO left feet.

I found that the only weay to learn for me was to go to loads of different classes around my neck of the woods. I also decided to go to a some of the beginners workshops, it was great to learn half the beginners moves in a four hour session. The workshops helped my confidence a great deal.

I find even now that certain moves that I have learnt are just not me, they get discarded, every now and again I learn a new move which I just know is made for me, its up to you to then make that move yours in what ever way you feel comfortable.

Good luck and keep at it, it has made me a very happy person over the years

[Billi Wiz]

Dancing to me is a lottery.. You can have the most fantastic dance with a beginner or a stuttering, wrestling one with an Advanced dancer... It never goes right all the time but when it does it feels fantastic!!

I imagine it's the same for the Ladies....

[marko]

I started 3.5 years ago and I still remember well the times when everything I led from a L/R hold was a first move and everything R/R was a yo-yo.

Oh yes, yes, yes. It isnt just me then What is it about those 2 moves that keep happening in any dance I do! Please god banish them from my mind .

I like the 'stairs' analogy. I think I am on a fairly large landing on the first floor, stumbling around in the dark looking for the next flight up.

[Martin]

Just recently I've changed the rules. I still say that guys must say "yes" - because a gentleman would never refuse a lady and we only have gentlemen at our classes. I say that the same rule applies to the ladies. If the guy is a gentleman she should always say "yes". However, if the lady thinks that, based on pervious (sic) form the guy is not a gentleman she should not be embarassed to say "no". And that includes guys who are not gentle as well as guys who are not gentlemanly.

I would never refuse a Lady, but I would refuse someone who has proved they are not a Lady... do your rules cover that?
[based on previous form, girl who is not ladylike]
Yes some females are pervs, yankers, and stuff...

I find it as frustrating as hell that some nights my mind is like a goldfish (oh no not another first move!) then others it just clicks and it feels great. Have other guys been through this too?

Join every other guy on the forum
I do not think you are alone, in fact , I do not think any guy has not had this same experience.

How did you get past that block and how long did it take.

Most nights ok, some nights... still working on it

[whitetiger1518]

Oh yes, yes, yes. It isnt just me then What is it about those 2 moves that keep happening in any dance I do! Please god banish them from my mind .

I like the 'stairs' analogy. I think I am on a fairly large landing on the first floor, stumbling around in the dark looking for the next flight up.

Actually I quite like a little bit of move repetition, it lets me play with styling, and footwork, (eurgh - will I ever get the triple step? ) and if you will let me - with steals and and plays on spins

E.g. I am not fond of the catapult (particularly if i am having a bad night, and the last 3 leads have led it every 2nd move ! )

However, if you lead me into a catapult, I now have a couple of steals which might cheer you up [on the couple of patient leads on whom I have practiced I haven't had any complaints ]

Cheers Whitetiger

[fletch]

Hey All

. How many times have you heard someone who is minted say that money isnt important?

Same for me with the dancing thing. DTS is a great dancer and has to fight the ladies off with a stick.

it is important to some, you just need to find and remember the ones who say its dosen't matter and meen it.

I have recenly had some feed back from several friends of mine regarding some one I use to dance quite a lot with, it appears he makes them feel inferior cos he seems to like to walk or talk them trough moves

Yes DTS does have to beat the ladies of with a stick and I for one would be very upset if at the end of the evining I looked around and realised i'd missed him, but its cos hes fun, up beat, interesting....and if you get it wromg he dosen't mind.

Every one knows I don't do lessons,

I just hate that didn't you get it right attitude, don't you know the wiggggly wogggly move then shall I walk you through it, or when you come off the floor the guy saying things like .....you know when I step back on my right then you .......blarrr blarrr blarrr load of bo!!ocks, so don't be a

DTS is not like this thats why he will always have loads of lovely ladies queing for him and I will be first in the que.:

so please marko even when you have been dancing for some years and think you know what your doing please don't walk or talk me trought moves i'm not the best, neaver will be, but like DTS we have fun.

Dancing is a journey


Relaxed and happy will shine thro a lot better.



XX

oooooooiyyyy you these are my lines

[Lynn]

OK - here is a question for the guys. I danced with a guy last night after the int class who was clearly quite nervous. He got jumbled up in the moves we'd just learned so I said 'lead anything'. I smiled a lot, I threw in a few wiggles and I think by the end of the dance he was a bit more relaxed.

Should I start asking him to dance every so often in the hope that he gets more relaxed dancing with me?