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Thread: Facebook Friend or Foe?

  1. #21
    Papa Smurf
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lory View Post
    Much the same as do with people I don't personally know, although weirdly, I have accepted friendships from people I only know through the forum.
    I see facebook purely as personal social networking, so early on i only tried to add people who were friends of me and Fi who i would invite to my new house for the house warming party (which we've still not had, but we'll get there), then i realised that was daft after finding out about events,groups etc.. and i now treat it as a big social book of people you know well enough to have a bit of banter with, which includes a few on the forum i haven't met.

    On the same note, I've embarrassingly refused people I 'do' know personally, simple cos I didn't know their real name!
    I think that should be encouraged, its against the rules to use a fake name anyway and defeats the purpose of having a social networking site - its not a mickey mouse one like myspace after all I always say something if i try to add someone as a friend - if i don't then i'd expect them to ignore me.

  2. #22
    Registered User emmylou25's Avatar
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    I've not had any ceroc/MJ 'friend' requests through facebook yet, but from people running salsa nights I've had quite a few.

    They do always seem to be from their real names - confusing until you go in to look at their profile - but they do tend to including "networking" under the Looking For part of their information. It helps me immediately delete those I'm not interested in.

    As long as I don't get too many of these, they don't bother me too much - I tend to join groups via friends anyway, so find the relevant ones that way.

  3. #23
    Lovely Moderator ducasi's Avatar
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by MartinHarper View Post
    I prefer the marketing to be done via "groups". So I join the ASEDA group, and thus I get invited to ASEDA events. If I don't want those invites, I leave that group.

    I dislike having Mr. Westie Coast (or whatever) wanting to be my friend. Get a real name, or get lost.


    Over the weekend I've had a friend request from an organisation in England I have no connection with. Never been to any of their events, and not especially likely to any time soon.

    Of course, if the person used their name, you never know, maybe I'd have known them and chosen to add them.
    Let your mind go and your body will follow. – Steve Martin, LA Story

  4. #24
    Forum Bombshell - Our Queen! Lory's Avatar
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by ducasi View Post

    Over the weekend I've had a friend request from an organisation in England I have no connection with. Never been to any of their events,
    Me too and I sent back a note saying 'no offence but I'm only interested in people who use their real names'
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  5. #25
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Me too, had that recently. Still once you realise its quite easy to block em and take em off. Its like pop ups annoying but absolutely unavoidable.

  6. #26
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by Dreadful Scathe View Post
    I always say something if i try to add someone as a friend - if i don't then i'd expect them to ignore me.
    na na na na na na na na Batnurse!!!!!!

  7. #27
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by batnurse View Post
    na na na na na na na na Batnurse!!!!!!
    reasonably identifiable from that, along with my status for the day i thought

  8. #28
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by Dreadful Scathe View Post
    reasonably identifiable from that, along with my status for the day i thought
    It couldn't have been anyone else!

  9. #29
    Registered User Twirly's Avatar
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by Dreadful Scathe View Post
    I see facebook purely as personal social networking, so early on i only tried to add people who were friends of me and Fi who i would invite to my new house for the house warming party (which we've still not had, but we'll get there), then i realised that was daft after finding out about events,groups etc.. and i now treat it as a big social book of people you know well enough to have a bit of banter with, which includes a few on the forum i haven't met.

    I think that should be encouraged, its against the rules to use a fake name anyway and defeats the purpose of having a social networking site - its not a mickey mouse one like myspace after all I always say something if i try to add someone as a friend - if i don't then i'd expect them to ignore me.
    I've just figured out who my latest friend on Facebook is! Didn't recognise the real name, but you mentioned "Twirly" in your message, so figured that you knew me from here, although I didn't recognise the person in the photo... Just been back to check out the other photos, and one was a bit of a giveaway

    I do wish that people from here would give me their user names when they invite me as a friend though, if I haven't actually met them IRL.

    Have one as yet unreplied to friend invitation from a guy who is clearly a dancer, but whom I don't recognise. I sent him a message politely saying that he obviously knew me through dancing, but could he please identify himself, and so far not a word back, which I find very odd.

  10. #30
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by Twirly View Post
    I do wish that people from here would give me their user names when they invite me as a friend though, if I haven't actually met them IRL.
    A fair point, but i thought you'd figure it out

  11. #31
    Formerly known as DavidJames David Bailey's Avatar
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by Twirly View Post
    I do wish that people from here would give me their user names when they invite me as a friend though, if I haven't actually met them IRL..
    Well, if you didn't all have such silly labels in the first place...

  12. #32
    Registered User Twirly's Avatar
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by David Bailey View Post
    Well, if you didn't all have such silly labels in the first place...
    Not our fault that you lack imagination...

  13. #33
    Formerly known as DavidJames David Bailey's Avatar
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by Twirly View Post
    Not our fault that you lack imagination...
    Actually, I think the "labels" is largely a girlie thing - more women than men seem to have separate "forum identities".

    If you look at the "most post" members, less than 25% of the women use their real names, whereas over 50% of the men do.
    Last edited by David Bailey; 7th-July-2008 at 03:19 PM.

  14. #34
    Registered User Twirly's Avatar
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Most likely a security thing - trying to avoid cyber-stalkers by not using real names. Maybe the women feel more vulnerable?

    I did look to see if my name was available, but of course there was already a member using it, didn't want to use it in combo with something else (been there, done that), so just came up with something else. Think there's a thread somewhere about how people come up with their online names.

  15. #35
    Not a spoon! Lou's Avatar
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by David Bailey View Post
    Actually, I think the "labels" is largely a girlie thing - more women than men seem to have separate "forum identities".

    If you look at the "most post" members, less than 25% of the women use their real names, whereas over 50% of the men do.
    I disagree. I've looked at the top 200 posters (nice round number) & it seems pretty much even. I split them by sex, and then decided whether they use their real name, a nickname, or a nickname based on their real name (like Tessalicious, or Dave The Scaffolder for instance)

    There's 91 Women.
    • 31 use their real names (9%)
    • 52 use nicknames (57%)
    • 8 use a nickname close to their real names (34%)


    There's 109 Men.
    • 37 use their real names (12%)
    • 59 use nicknames (54%)
    • 13 use a nickname close to their real names (34%)


    Of course, there's room for error in my calculations. But I don't think it'll make that significant a difference.

    Feel free to go into your workings, though.

    I got a strange sense of deja vu doing this. And I realised I really need a job.

  16. #36
    Formerly known as DavidJames David Bailey's Avatar
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lou View Post
    I disagree. I've looked at the top 200 posters
    Good God, woman.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lou View Post
    And I realised I really need a job.
    I think you're right.

  17. #37
    Not a spoon! Lou's Avatar
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by David Bailey View Post
    Good God, woman.
    But your numbers were crying in pain! I hate to see statistics suffer.
    Quote Originally Posted by David Bailey View Post
    I think you're right.
    I'm trying!

  18. #38
    Senior Member Minnie M's Avatar
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Quote Originally Posted by Dreadful Scathe View Post
    Sounds like the organiser wasn't really a "friend" or even an acquaintance, and its the dancer who is at fault for adding everyone willy-nilly just to make themselves feel more popular Black ball the dancer, thats what i say
    I never accept an 'unknown' facebook friend without asking first who they are and why they want to be my "friend"

    Quote Originally Posted by SPROGGS View Post
    Yes I agree.. Targeting friends of friends on networking sites via the back door is unacceptable....This is not a practice I subscribe to...

    The best way to get new dancers is by recomendation from the dancers themselves - So if organiser runs a good and professional club that dancers enjoy going to there should be no need for any dubious practices.

    We advertise on "UK jive" and " Are you dancing" as do many of the dance clubs...

    Modern Jive dance classes and events in the UK

    and a new one I have found..

    Are You Dancing? Find Jive, Swing, Latin, Ballroom and Folk dance events across the UK

    ??? If you are in Hastings - why don't you advertise on my list


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  19. #39
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    is it worth me wasting even more time by learning to use Facebook?

    Or just accept it as Foe and steer well clear?

  20. #40
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    Re: Facebook Friend or Foe?

    Do remember, there is no such thing as a free lunch

    Face book sell advertising that will be targeted on the information you have given them

    Ads | Facebook

    So far, I have found the advantages outweigh the disadvantages

    But I am amazes at the number of people, who advertise were and what they doing tonight or will away all weekend

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