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Thread: There's hope for us all...

  1. #21
    Papa Smurf
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    Re: What have you learnt in the past 24 hours?

    Quote Originally Posted by Twirly View Post


    So very true... why is the standard ideal ... standardised?
    Ooh clever, like it

    It's usually slim, big boobs, blonde, straightened hair. You see so many women who looks like clones of each other, particularly in the City.

    Ultimately people try and fit in; sometimes because they don't have enough confidence to stand out, but sometimes because they find it easier to control their lives when outwardly they fit in. People who don't care to fit in are very bold and/or mad.

    Dr.Smurf

  2. #22
    Registered User David Franklin's Avatar
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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    Quote Originally Posted by Tiggerbabe View Post
    Looking at the photos, it would have been good if the 4th one had the after picture in the same close-up.
    That's a pretty dreadful "before" picture, isn't it?

    I've managed to do this:



    but I had to do a lot more drastic work to cover the skin blemishes - it's no longer just a bit of 'enhancement'.

    What's interesting here is to look around the chin, where the skin ends up looking 'plastic' because I've blurred/cloned so heavily.

    Then note how much of their "after" image has the same kind of look.

  3. #23
    Registered User Twirly's Avatar
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    Re: What have you learnt in the past 24 hours?

    Quote Originally Posted by Dreadful Scathe View Post
    Ultimately people try and fit in; sometimes because they don't have enough confidence to stand out, but sometimes because they find it easier to control their lives when outwardly they fit in. People who don't care to fit in are very bold and/or mad.

    Dr.Smurf
    What I was asking was why has the slim/big boobs/straightened blonde hair become what women seem to aspire to? Why is that the ideal right now rather than anything else? After all the look does change over time – there was a time when rubenesque was the look to aspire to, and other ages when the slim and boyish flapper was the look du jour.

    I was wondering whether it was due to what is portrayed in porn magazines – in other words it’s women trying to look as they think men want them to look. And yet we have plenty of men on here saying they don’t really like the look.

    Quote Originally Posted by Nessiemonster View Post
    Hmm, very interesting DF. I guess the moral is don't trust anything you see in pictures.

    Personally I reckon it's more important to love yourself and be confident with your own body, both the bits you like and the bits you don't. That confidence will shine through and give you an 'inner' beauty that is far deeper and stronger than anything superficial and 'skin deep'. Just my opinion...
    I love the theory… why is it so hard to put into practice?

    As for all this skulduggery with these pictures, what concerns me far more is the pressure put on women to conform and think that they need to look a certain way to be beautiful/acceptable. Some women go all out to achieve the “look” they want and have lots of surgery, whilst others join in to a lesser extent – I stick to lotions and potions, but I’m not immune to the pressure, even more so now I'm a little more mature

    I find myself in the very fortunate position to have found someone who loves me just as I am, and keeps looking at me with a very perplexed expression and asking why I keep on “colouring yourself in” in the mornings… and says that I look my best when I’ve just woken up (mind you, we’ll see how long that lasts, he’s just got new glasses and can see clearly )

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    Re: What have you learnt in the past 24 hours?

    I have always thought that the greatest natural beauty enhancers were love, lager and the light switch.

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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    I'm very proud to say that i have had cosmetic surgery - I lost 7.5 stone and still didnt like the way i looked so i went in to have a tummy tuck 3 years ago. It has changed my life completely for the better

    However i know am still no supermodel - still overweight and no oil painting - but am i happy - YES!

    So i think its ok to modify your body as long as you know when to stop

  6. #26
    Forum Bombshell - Our Queen! Lory's Avatar
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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    I'm sending all the photo's of me to David Franklin in future!
    MODERATOR AT YOUR SERVICE
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    Forum Bombshell - Our Queen! Lory's Avatar
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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    Quote Originally Posted by DD+ View Post
    I'm very proud to say that i have had cosmetic surgery - I lost 7.5 stone and still didnt like the way i looked so i went in to have a tummy tuck 3 years ago. It has changed my life completely for the better
    Absolutely brilliant!
    However i know am still no supermodel - still overweight and no oil painting - but am i happy - YES!
    I lost quite a lot of weight a few years back, then gradually put a bit back on (nowhere near all of it) and last year I lost the bit I'd gained again, plus I hit the gym hard. (which if I'm honest, I've let lapse over the last 3 weeks, due to being away for 3 long weekends in a row, plus having a cough)

    But, even though I'm pleased with myself in one way, I still flippin' hate the way I look! So, your very very lucky indeed!

    When you loose weight after a certain age, your face drops and people start asking you, why your looking miserable, even when your not which MAKES you miserable and then you look even worse!


    So i think its ok to modify your body as long as you know when to stop
    I'm saving up!
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    Registered User Twirly's Avatar
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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    Quote Originally Posted by Lory View Post
    But, even though I'm pleased with myself in one way, I still flippin' hate the way I look! So, your very very lucky indeed!
    If that's the way you feel, then that's the way you feel - but when I met you for the first time at Storm, I thought you looked amazing. One of the sexiest women on the dancefloor - since I'm also female (and straight!), I hate to think of the effect you must have on the men!

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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    I think that no matter what your age or gender or other people's perception of you is many of us have some insecurities about the way we look.

    I spend a lot of time working with young people both male and female that have body image issues. One of the tasks I often do with groups of pupils like this is to ask them to name 5 things (at least 3 have to be below the neck) that they like about their own body. I then get them to feedback their answers to the group. Usually everyone leaves with more than 5 things that they like about their own body.

    In so many ways we often concentrate on the negatives rather than the positives. This activity is designed to encourage people to look at the positives!

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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    Quote Originally Posted by Lory View Post

    When you loose weight after a certain age, your face drops and people start asking you, why your looking miserable, even when your not which MAKES you miserable and then you look even worse!



    I'm saving up!
    Totally disagree....will show you my before and after photos one day, (not brave enough to put them on here), but having lost over 4.5 stone, (at only 4ft 10in that was a lot of extra weight!) I have not looked or felt miserable since the day I got to my goal weight, best thing I have could ever have done for myself.

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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    Quote Originally Posted by Georgious dancer View Post
    I think that no matter what your age or gender or other people's perception of you is many of us have some insecurities about the way we look....
    Unfortunately there are too many people that have to sell you the idea that you are somehow deficient before they can sell you something else.

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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    Quote Originally Posted by Lory View Post
    When you loose weight after a certain age, your face drops and people start asking you, why your looking miserable, even when your not which MAKES you miserable and then you look even worse!



    I hope i dont look miserable - I'm a smiler thro and thro

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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    Quote Originally Posted by Jay Jay View Post
    will show you my before and after photos one day, (not brave enough to put them on here),
    I've seen your before and after photos and you should put them on here to inspire others. It's unbeleivable that you are the same person when you compare pics. I have to say also that I think you look much younger and trendier now than you did when you were bigger.

    I know what Lory means though, some people (not all) do look terrible when they lose a lot of weight. Take Nigel Lawson, for example. He looked like a slightly warmed up corpse when he lost all his weight.

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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    Quote Originally Posted by Twirly View Post
    I hate to think of the effect you must have on the men!
    Gav drools over Lory all the time. It doesn't bother me. I've had a few wet dreams about her myself.

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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    Quote Originally Posted by Double Trouble View Post
    Gav drools over Lory all the time. It doesn't bother me. I've had a few wet dreams about her myself.
    I try to avoid it nowadays, the dry cleaning bills were crippling me

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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    Quote Originally Posted by Double Trouble View Post
    Gav drools over Lory all the time. It doesn't bother me. I've had a few wet dreams about her myself.
    I'm not sure I wanted to know that But 'thanks' I think
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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    Quote Originally Posted by Double Trouble View Post
    Gav drools over Lory all the time. It doesn't bother me. I've had a few wet dreams about her myself.
    Ick. (PLUS an extra few characters.)

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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    Quote Originally Posted by Barry Shnikov View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Double Trouble View Post
    I've had a few wet dreams about her myself.
    Ick.
    There's something wrong with you

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    Re: There's hope for us all...

    Quote Originally Posted by Double Trouble View Post
    I've seen your before and after photos and you should put them on here to inspire others. It's unbeleivable that you are the same person when you compare pics. I have to say also that I think you look much younger and trendier now than you did when you were bigger.
    I should have the confidence to expose those pictures to the forum but don't think I'm brave enough...let them know me as 'thin' Jay Jay!

    Thank you for the lovely comments tho, comments like that keep me where I am

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    Re: What have you learnt in the past 24 hours?

    Quote Originally Posted by Twirly View Post
    I was wondering whether it was due to what is portrayed in porn magazines – in other words it’s women trying to look as they think men want them to look. And yet we have plenty of men on here saying they don’t really like the look.
    Oh no - porn is quite a niche product frankly - you only need to look at the media in general to see the use of "slim, pretty, sexy, made-up". I think its less to do with how woman think men want them to look and more to do with fitting in with other woman. Theres nothing worse than thinking you look worse than someone else because you are further away from what society seems to have as the "perfect woman" - everyone wants, at least, a level playing field to play from . This works for men more than it used to, just look at the amount of money spent on grooming products, clothes, cars etc...

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