Men having men - is it frowned upon?

[Trouble]

Well, went dancing last night, wont say where but was told that the organiser/runner of the venue is very against men dancing with men and would not allow her staff/venue helpers to do it.

I was aghast at this as i find men dancing with men actually great to watch, very entertaining and love it.

I was also quite fed up that people feel they have the right to dictate who you can dance with at a venue.

should it be frowned upon. Same for woman and woman dancing?

[Daisy Chain]

should it be frowned upon. Same for woman and woman dancing?

Absolutely not, although I would feel miffed if there were a shortage of men for us women.

However, I felt sorry for the real men who had to dance with the man dressed up as a woman in the class at one of the venues when I first started Cerocing

Daisy

(An Easy Going Little Flower)

Anyway, what about morris dancing?

[DD+]

I agree - How ridiculous! Its the 20th century for god sakes I often get asked by ladies to lead them - it is a dance at then end of the day - i really dont understand whats wrong with it. same for Male male dances i love to watch them

Its only harmless fun at the end of the day

[Agente Secreto]

Well, went dancing last night, wont say where but was told that the organiser/runner of the venue is very against men dancing with men and would not allow her staff/venue helpers to do it.

I was aghast at this as i find men dancing with men actually great to watch, very entertaining and love it.

I was also quite fed up that people feel they have the right to dictate who you can dance with at a venue.

should it be frowned upon. Same for woman and woman dancing?

My only problem with dancing as a follow for another man is that I'm crap. Does go to show there are many uptight people out there.

[Miss Flicts]

Well, went dancing last night, wont say where but was told that the organiser/runner of the venue is very against men dancing with men and would not allow her staff/venue helpers to do it.

I was aghast at this as i find men dancing with men actually great to watch, very entertaining and love it.

I was also quite fed up that people feel they have the right to dictate who you can dance with at a venue.

should it be frowned upon. Same for woman and woman dancing?

I think that's appalling, and very uptight/old-fashioned/judgemental. We should all be free to dance with whoever we like, male or female, gay or straight. It improves everybody's dancing to try leading/following, and promotes a nice friendly, fun, non-judgemental atmosphere.

Most of the men I know who dance with other men are straight anyway, but even if it were a 'real' gay couple I can't see the problem. It's 2008, not 1950!

[Jhutch]

I agree - How ridiculous! Its the 20th century for god sakes

Even better than that - its the 21st!

[Little Monkey]

Well, went dancing last night, wont say where but was told that the organiser/runner of the venue is very against men dancing with men and would not allow her staff/venue helpers to do it.

should it be frowned upon. Same for woman and woman dancing?

This is outrageous! Funny thing is that hardly anyone bats an eyelid if it's two women dancing together (people are probably more used to this because of the shortage of male dancers??), but if it's two men dancing it's all of a sudden offensive?

Like you, I find it very entertaining to watch two men dancing together. And as a female lead I also get asked by ladies to dance quite a lot, which I have no problem with at all!

BTW DD+, I'm afraid you're not quite up to date.... This is the 21st century!

[Gerry]

Well, went dancing last night, wont say where but was told that the organiser/runner of the venue is very against men dancing with men and would not allow her staff/venue helpers to do it.

I was aghast at this as i find men dancing with men actually great to watch, very entertaining and love it.

I was also quite fed up that people feel they have the right to dictate who you can dance with at a venue.

should it be frowned upon. Same for woman and woman dancing?

I don't know what all the fuss is about, you pay your money and you dance with who you please.
Personally, I have found it a real challenge to be led by a male or female lead whether it is in MJ or WCS.
Hopefully my experiences will make me a more rounded dancer.

Trouble, love dancing with you as a follower

[Twirly]

Again, agree with all the comments that it's ridiculous.

I have a suspicion that they'd be on dodgy ground if they tried to enforce this though. Surely these days it would count as discrimination? Part of me would like to see them being sued quite frankly.

[rubyred]

I can't get my head around why people should dictate who you should dance with and for them to think it is not ok to dance with same sex partners.

Has it got something to do with homophobia? By the way that is a question. Is the venue worried that the sight of men dancing together may give off an image they don't like? Pleeeesssseee

Why is deemed ok generally for women to act as leads? It is not frowned on as much by the thought police as men dancing with men! If people don't feel comfortable about dancing with the same sex then just say no thank you when asked - simple.

Dancing is about being able to express yourself and have fun and if you feel you would be able to do this with a same sex partner then no one should dictate to you on this score. Blimey I would be gutted if I couldn't have a dance with for example Dai she is an absolute star.

[DD+]

Even better than that - its the 21st!

Whoops Fingers went faster than my brain

[rubyred]

Trouble, love dancing with you as a follower

Aw shucks I'm gutted now !!!!.....Gerry you didn't say that to me when I last tried to lead you. LOL

[Twirly]

Has it got something to do with homophobia? By the way that is a question. Is the venue worried that the sight of men dancing together may give off an image they don't like? Pleeeesssseee

I fear it can't really be anything else can it? The only "legitimate" excuse could possibly be that if men dance with men that there will be too many spare women. But I don't really buy that - they'd have to have a pretty severe shortfall of men and a lot of men dancing with each other to make it a big enough problem.

Why is deemed ok generally for women to act as leads?

I think it's historical. There has always been a shortage of men, so rather than sit out, women have always danced together. It used to be because men were away fighting a war, and if there wasn't a war on there was often a shortage of men as lots had got killed in the last one. So it just became socially acceptable.

Sadly, I hear comments (from people I expect better from) asking if men who dance together are gay - and when I've said that they're not as far as I'm aware, have been asked how I know!

[Jhutch]

Well, went dancing last night, wont say where but was told that the organiser/runner of the venue is very against men dancing with men and would not allow her staff/venue helpers to do it.

I was aghast at this as i find men dancing with men actually great to watch, very entertaining and love it.

I was also quite fed up that people feel they have the right to dictate who you can dance with at a venue.

should it be frowned upon. Same for woman and woman dancing?

Does this refer to the class or the freestyle (or both)?

[rubyred]

I think it's historical. There has always been a shortage of men, so rather than sit out, women have always danced together. It used to be because men were away fighting a war, and if there wasn't a war on there was often a shortage of men as lots had got killed in the last one. So it just became socially acceptable.

Sorry Twirly it was meant as a rhetorical question.

I just think that people get so caught up with the notion that if your a man then you behave in this way or else your not a 'real man' and lots of people suffer prejudice because of it.

In the dance world I love the way the blokes dance together, and its great watching their faces especially when they are wondering 'what bloody move is coming next'' There is a skill to following too.

[Lee Bartholomew]

Men Dancing with Men? Should be banned

[Gerry]

Sorry Twirly it was meant as a rhetorical question.

I just think that people get so caught up with the notion that if your a man then you behave in this way or else your not a 'real man' and lots of people suffer prejudice because of it.

In the dance world I love the way the blokes dance together, and its great watching their faces especially when they are wondering 'what bloody move is coming next'' There is a skill to following too.

I wonder if anyone has thought that I am not a real man when I have been following!!

Too right, when I have been following, I have found there have been times when I have been flung around like a rag doll, I am sure my face is telling a story

[straycat]

and when I've said that they're not as far as I'm aware, have been asked how I know!

Just point out that you can smell the testosterone. (I have no idea what that means, but it should shut them up nicely) Failing that, you could say that they weren't gay last year, but dancing can do some strange things to people.

I just don't think a question like that deserves a serious answer

[rubyred]

I wonder if anyone has thought that I am not a real man when I have been following!!

Too right, when I have been following, I have found there have been times when I have been flung around like a rag doll, I am sure my face is telling a story

I was referring to life in general and questioning who has the right to say that because you are a man you have to behave in a certain way and if you are a woman you have to do similarly.

[jive-vee]

I love watching good dancers dance together - male/female, female/female, male/male. I like dancing whether I'm following a male or female. I'm haven't yet been brave enough to ask other females to lead me unless I already know them as I wasn't sure they weren't just choosing to lead their friends - but I will be asking them at future freestyle events . If a female lead asked me for a dance I would love it. I don't currently lead people other than a couple of my mates as I can't dance well enough as a lead to make it interesting for them.

Just a thought but possibly the reason for some venues frowning upon male/male, female/female dancing together could be the "no refusal" unwritten rule? If some men/women (who are uncomfortable dancing with the same gender) thought dancing with the same gender was the norm, they might feel awkward refusing so instead don't come back and spread the word leading to a drop in numbers??