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Thread: A humble announcement

  1. #41
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    Re: A humble announcement

    Quote Originally Posted by Isis View Post
    * Isis, the High Priestess of the Contact Lens Force (from long before silly scientists noticed it), uses the knowledge from her magic book to put everyone in the thread into an hypnotic trance*

    YOU WILL ALL GO TO ASDA OPTICIANS

    YOU WILL ALL BUY CIBA VISION LENSES

    (and I don't work for/have shares in either company, they're both just good.)
    It has come to our attention that you have used the phrase the contact lens force without acknowledging our client's copyright.

    This is a cease and desist letter. Our client will not tolerate further use of the phrase the contact lens force without such acknowledgement being duly made.

    We note that you intend to make use of the contact lens force . This would be in direct conflict with our client's registered patent in this matter. He is prepared to grant you a licence, both to use the phrase the contact lens force (which as from 12 December 2007 will also be a registered trademark) as well as to exploit the contact lens force itself for commercial gain. Such licence however will only be granted on strict terms limiting geographically and temporally the exploitation of the phenomenon.

    Should you determine not to avail yourself of this unmissable licensing opportunity, we anticipate receiving instructions from our client to issue a claim against you in the High Court. Substantial damages will be claimed in addition to a permanent injunction, and in the event that you refuse to give an undertaking to remain in your house at all times we will seek a world-wide freezing order against you with attendant costs.

    Please do not hesitate to contact us if you wish to discuss our client's offer.

    You should seek legal advice without delay.

    Signed

    Profitable Licensing Law Partnership

  2. #42
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    Re: A humble announcement

    Am I allowed to use the phrase 'the contact lens force ' oh originator Mr Barry ?

  3. #43
    Registered User SteveK's Avatar
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    Re: A humble announcment

    Quote Originally Posted by ducasi View Post
    Can I suggest to everyone that they consider daily lenses? They're so much less hassle.
    You've obviously got more midoclorians than me, and are able to resist the contact lens force type thingy better than me. Soft lenses would just curl up, and would be even harder to get in my eyes! I know my limitations, and I think I'll stick with hard lenses.


    Apologies to any Star Wars fans if I've spelt midoclorians wrongly, but I wonder how The Force (copyright George Lucus) would cope with Barry's Contact Lens Force. Which would win?

  4. #44
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    Re: A humble announcment

    Quote Originally Posted by Barry Shnikov View Post
    Well, in keeping with the best of modern scientists - McKeith, Behe, Dembski et al - I scoff at peer reviewed publication, which is long winded and pompous and causes unnecessary delays. I have determined to go straight to the media with my discovery, so that the benighted general public may the sooner benefit from my monumental insights.

    Consequently - er - the pressure to move with some speed has meant that I am still (with my lab team, obviously) working on some of the fine aspects of the theory.

    You will see, however, if you re-read the announcement carefully, that I cautiously expressed the possibility that the the contact lens force waxes and wanes. (I am open to the possibility that the contact lens force is associated with solar proximity, that is, there is some amelioration of the the contact lens force due to the bulk of the earth between the lens and the sun.) In any event, I had already noted the lessening of the effect towards the end of the day.

    However, your post raises the interesting possiblity of some connection between alcohol and the contact lens force . I would be interested - should you care to do further research - in your additional conclusions.

    You may wish to PM me in respect of the possibility that we could apply for funding for your experiment - how much alcohol do you think you would get through?
    Barry, I think they've improved the peer review process somewhat recently...


  5. #45
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    Re: A humble announcment

    Quote Originally Posted by ducasi View Post
    When were you told that? I think there are now daily lenses suitable for astigmatism sufferers.

    Edit: yup, there are.
    Quote Originally Posted by jeanag View Post
    Ah thanks! I was told earlier on this year at my eye exam. Something to do with lens prescription + astigmatism = no suitable lenses...

    I've heard the same story (and I'm already using J&J lenses).

    Something to do with angles - a lens for astigmatism has to be aligned at a certain angle to correct my vision, and they don't make a daily lens anywhere near the correct angle for my eyes.
    Love dance, will travel

  6. #46
    Registered User Isis's Avatar
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    Re: A humble announcement

    Quote Originally Posted by Barry Shnikov View Post
    It has come to our attention that you have used the phrase the contact lens force without acknowledging our client's copyright.

    This is a cease and desist letter. Our client will not tolerate further use of the phrase the contact lens force without such acknowledgement being duly made.
    The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force.


  7. #47
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    Re: A humble announcement

    Quote Originally Posted by Isis View Post
    The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force, The Contact Lens Force.


  8. #48
    Registered User Isis's Avatar
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    Re: A humble announcement

    Quote Originally Posted by Barry Shnikov View Post
    Does this mean I'm off the hook or are you laughing at how much compensation I will have to pay you?

  9. #49
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    Re: A humble announcement

    Quote Originally Posted by Isis View Post
    Does this mean I'm off the hook or are you laughing at how much compensation I will have to pay you?


    Another good one!

  10. #50
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    Re: A humble announcement

    Ahhh - Lawyer humour - don't let him drag you in Isis - it's a cunning ploy so he can up the amounts.....

  11. #51
    Registered User Isis's Avatar
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    Re: A humble announcement

    Quote Originally Posted by Mezzosoprano View Post
    Ahhh - Lawyer humour - don't let him drag you in Isis - it's a cunning ploy so he can up the amounts.....
    And here was me thinking lawyers didn't have a sense of humour. You learn something new every day.

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