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Thread: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

  1. #41
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    Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    I went to my old MJ venue last night and was surprised when (apparently) I misfollowed a move to hear one of my used to be favourite dancers say "oo you didn't do class did you?".... Actually No I didn't do class but I felt like saying "well you didn't lead it right" but i bit my tongue after all he is one of the guys there that I do like to dance with usually.....maybe I should have said summat but i dunno.....

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    Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by MartinHarper View Post
    That is correct. Like the women you spoke to, I have enough wisdom to realise the futility of "retaliating" by offering negative feedback of my own, and enough self-control to avoid futile retaliation.



    How were you planning to interject without providing unsolicited advice?
    Well, good for you, on being in the possession of Olympian self-control. By 'unsolicited advice' - if you want to nit-pick - I mean commentary, opinion, or interjection pertaining to the execution of moves within the dance, rather than alerting the follower to the fact that what they're doing may be actively dangerous or painful to my own person, which I don't hesitate to do. Kind of like refraining from correcting someone if they're making a roux sauce incorrectly, but not hestitating to essay an admonition if they try to stick your fingers in the blender while they're doing it.

  3. #43
    Senior Member rubyred's Avatar
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    Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    I have been pulled up by a few leaders, one told me I have too much strength in my right arm, and he told me I was crap. One that my finger tip hold was too tight and I was squeezing his fingers. I was so mortified by this one because I thought he was a really good dancer and had plucked up the courage to ask him to dance. I was SO nervous so held on for dear life. However the way he told me wasn't very nice and it made me feel a bit horrible. I think that its the way things are put across to you, I appreciate constructive criticism and will always listen if things are put properly. You don't have to resort to insults and if that happens I just finish the dance and resolve not to dance with someone so rude again.

    Personally I would not tell anyone about their dancing unless I was invited to do so by them or if I was taxi dancing and it was appropriate. Another exception - if someone is too rough and have hurt me then I will let them know that a smoother approach is better, always approach things in a positive way and then people don't feel like crap.
    if you love the life you live then you'll get a lot more done

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    Cool Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by rubyred View Post
    I have been pulled up by a few leaders, one told me I have too much strength in my right arm, and he told me I was crap. One that my finger tip hold was too tight and I was squeezing his fingers.
    To redress this balance a little.... Ruby, as you know you are one of my most favorite dance partners. I love every dance I have with you. It is always an exciting adventure spinning you around the floor, and I am hoping to convince you to travel up to Derby tomorrow night for Utopia so I can dance with you some more. I'm missing our dances... it's been too long!!!

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    Senior Member rubyred's Avatar
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    Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by StokeBloke View Post
    To redress this balance a little.... Ruby, as you know you are one of my most favorite dance partners. I love every dance I have with you. It is always an exciting adventure spinning you around the floor, and I am hoping to convince you to travel up to Derby tomorrow night for Utopia so I can dance with you some more. I'm missing our dances... it's been too long!!!

    Ohh that is so good to hear but I am going to Blackpool to watch the Professional Latin Champs, I bought the tickets it seems like neon months ago.... OOOO Stokie I miss you tooxx I hope you and Twirly Bird have a great time.
    if you love the life you live then you'll get a lot more done

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    Cool Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by rubyred View Post
    Ohh that is so good to hear but I am going to Blackpool to watch the Professional Latin Champs, I bought the tickets it seems like neon months ago.... OOOO Stokie I miss you tooxx I hope you and Twirly Bird have a great time.
    Bloomin' sod you then! :sulk:





    x

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    Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    No! I! Don't! Bark! Orders! At! My! Partner!

    (I also don't try and correct my partner either)

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    Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by killingtime View Post
    No! I! Don't! Bark! Orders! At! My! Partner!)
    Come to think of it, in a dance, I did say "Sit!" last week.

  9. #49
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    Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by Terpsichorea View Post
    I wish more sabotage workshops were taught
    yes please - jumping in eager expectation!!!
    Agree to constructive criticism - when something can actually be improved upon, I will take advice gratefully - will stop mid-dance, or will practice the next half of the dance to improve it, but barking orders and the look of disgust are totally unacceptable

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    Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    Ruby step away from the weird Stokie and come to the clean Welsh light.

    XXX XXX DTS Dave

    Ps I have home made cakes
    Last edited by dave the scaffolder; 16th-November-2007 at 09:56 PM. Reason: Cakes baby cakes I can Bake xxx

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    Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by dave the scaffolder View Post
    Ruby step away from the weird Stokie and come to the clean Welsh light.

    XXX XXX DTS Dave

    Ps I have home made cakes
    Ruby stay away from the welsh light, he is bluffin, he aint got cakes cause he ate em all.

    Stokie, i thought i was your favourite dance partner you two timing git.

  12. #52
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    Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by Trouble View Post
    Ruby stay away from the welsh light, he is bluffin, he aint got cakes cause he ate em all.

    Stokie, i thought i was your favourite dance partner you two timing git.
    You know I am a Celt but that bloody light is blinding me turn it off .... and where are me cakes ??? I was promised CAKES....and a girl who likes her curves needs cakes....Stokie you've been two timing me as well, how could you well how am I ever going to recover from this...

    P.S. Professional Latin and Amateur Ballroom at Blackpool tonight was just unbelievable it was a feast for the eyes. Wow
    if you love the life you live then you'll get a lot more done

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    Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    Barking orders... no don't do it.

    I did hear from the stage "We have had feedback from beginners, that they are sometimes put off, from Intermediates joining in the beginners class and giving them instruction. If you are intermediate we value you helping out in the beginner class, but we do ask you to leave dance instruction to the teacher."

    I thought this was a great general rule... Thing was I still gave some instruction A firstimer was spinning the wrong way... she said "opps, what am I doing?" I asked her if she would like me to help, she said yes, so I told her to relax and wait for the lead to see which way she should turn.

    So I broke the rule, but then, she was happy and we chatted later and had a few dances, and she bought a 6 week pass.

    2 times I have seen a woman walk out of a dance... both times I thought... good on them.

    1/ The lead was looking all around the room, showing off and had no care for his partner...(checking out who to dance with next) 3 times she said, hey look at me, you are dancing with me.
    Nothing improved, so she stopped, walked off, and called him an a*se.

    2/ The follower told the lead several times... "No, I do not like those close moves, please do not do them with me"... He came back with the response "but I have seen you do those moves with xxxxxxx"... her response being "I trust xxxxxx, I know xxxxx, I do not know you, please stop"
    After 2 more moves of this type she slapped his face and walked off.

  14. #54
    Registered User nebula's Avatar
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    Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    And you have seen all those because you were
    1) sitting very very close to were they were dancing?
    2) was dancing very very close to them and paying more attention to what was going on next to you than to your own partner? Did your partner tell you "I am here" too?

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    Re: Men! Do you bark orders at/correct your follower mid-dance?

    Quote Originally Posted by nebula View Post
    And you have seen all those because you were
    1) sitting very very close to were they were dancing?
    2) was dancing very very close to them and paying more attention to what was going on next to you than to your own partner? Did your partner tell you "I am here" too?

    Number 1)

    And they are both close friends of mine, who then came over and gave me a complete run down of how it made them feel.

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