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Thread: Madeleine

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    Madeleine

    I'm in tears.


    I've just heard the story about this toddler being abducted in Portugal.

    The parents were having dinner in a restaurant about 100 yards away and going back to the apartment every 30 mins to check up on her. When the father went back, she was gone & it was clear she had been taken.

    Just imagine if that was you?

    I can barely see the screen for tears, just thinking about what that poor child might be going through and the guilt those parents must be feeling.

    I'm praying she is found safe and well. Anything else is unthinkable.

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    B.O.G.O.F. fletch's Avatar
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    Re: Madeline



    this is must be every parents nightmeare

    I carn't imagine just what they are going through




    come home safe Madeline....this is my daughters name and spelt the same

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    Re: Madeline

    Jeremy Vine is discussing it on Radio 2 and lots of listeners are blaming the parents for leaving the child in the room while going out for dinner. As if they wouldn't feel bad enough.

    How would you ever get over something like that?

    I wouldn't get over it. It would be goodnight nurse for me...over and out.

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    Registered User Twirly's Avatar
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    Re: Madeline

    I haven't read the full story, and yes, it's tragic - but isn't it illegal to leave a child under the age of 12 alone?

    Although regardless, it's awful of someone to take a child, unattended or not. Hope she gets found OK.

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    Re: Madeline

    Quote Originally Posted by Twirly View Post
    I haven't read the full story, and yes, it's tragic - but isn't it illegal to leave a child under the age of 12 alone?
    No. From what I understand, the resort that they were staying at have a group of 'nanny's' that patrol the holiday camp listening out for crying children & presumably intruders. If they heard anything they would radio to the Restaurant to let the parents know.

    Until today, I would have considered doing that myself. I wont let my kids out of my sight from now on.....Abroad or not.

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    Re: Madeline

    Quote Originally Posted by Twirly View Post
    - but isn't it illegal to leave a child under the age of 12 alone?

    .
    not in the UK

    I have questioned people who are much more in the 'know' than me, who are involved with legal childcare etc, and its up the the parents to make sure they are responsible enough to be left, I had this issue recently, my children have desided after 6 years seperation, they no longer want to see there farther.

    Are they able to be left on there own? is Maddie old enough to look after Joe ?


    Its seem your ok untill there a problem

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    Re: Madeline

    Quote Originally Posted by Twirly View Post
    I haven't read the full story, and yes, it's tragic - but isn't it illegal to leave a child under the age of 12 alone?
    It may or not be illegal, but sometimes circumstances dictate otherwise. Even responsible parents do have to make judgement calls. It would appear to have been be a poor one in this case and we have to feel for the poor parents .

    Having been a single parent with 2 kids under 12, I am coloured in my opinion that two parents having dinner while leaving a child alone, would appear to have been an unnecessary risk - Hindsight being a wonderful thing of course.

    .

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    Re: Madeline

    Nobody could, or should, watch their children 24/7. Mother love becomes smother love. We have had a recent case in the Uk where a child was abducted from her own home whilst her mother was in another room. I remember a case where a child was killed in an accident whilst tethered to her mother.

    The last thing any child needs is a neurotic parents.

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    Re: Madeline

    Quote Originally Posted by bigdjiver View Post
    Nobody could, or should, watch their children 24/7. Mother love becomes smother love.
    I'm trying to be less protective of my children. Allowing them to play out now the weather is nice, etc. I do find it very stressful though. I can't relax until they are in the house and the doors are locked. I'm one of those mothers who thinks everyone is a potential child abuser and I trust no one.

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    Re: Madeline

    Quote Originally Posted by bigdjiver View Post
    Nobody could, or should, watch their children 24/7. Mother love becomes smother love. We have had a recent case in the Uk where a child was abducted from her own home whilst her mother was in another room. I remember a case where a child was killed in an accident whilst tethered to her mother.

    The last thing any child needs is a neurotic parents.
    True I agree and although there is no law that states the minimum age that a child can be left alone, it is an offence to leave a child alone when doing so puts him or her at risk. The age, level of maturity and understanding, where the child will be left and how long and often or whether or not there are any other children in the household.

    The NSPCC recommends that a baby or very young child should not be left alone at home whether asleep or awake, even for a few minutes. Most children under 13 should not be left for more than a short period and children under 16 should not be left on their own overnight.

    I feel sorry for the parents if they felt they had addressed things appropriately but personally I would never leave a little one alone, they can injure themselves so quickly.

    I know as a parent we may tend to focus on what other parents are doing and think ' I would never do that ' but hey ho who's perfect. Still, safety should be a paramount issue.

    Lets not forget to put some focus on the kind of person who would take a child away like that and I hope that the little mite turns up safely.

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    Re: Madeline

    Quote Originally Posted by rubyred View Post
    Lets not forget to put some focus on the kind of person who would take a child away like that and I hope that the little mite turns up safely.




    good post RubyRed from someone who is in 'the know'

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    Re: Madeline

    I hope with all my heart this little girl is found safe and sound!

    I can only imagine the stress and worry those parents are going through at the moment, it must be unbearable!!!

    But, I can't help wondering what the hell they were thinking, leaving three children under four, all alone in a strange apartment anyway. My considerations probably wouldn't have been kidnap but what if there'd been a fire? Or she'd woken up and was frightened!
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    Re: Madeline

    It used to be the 'norm' at pontins resorts in the UK too.
    My parents left me in the chalet while they went for a dance and a few drinks, safe in the knowledge that a spotty teenager in a bright jacket was patrolling the chalets listening out for crying babies.
    How times have changed.

    I really do feel for the parents, it's an awful thing to face. I honestly believe that if all my kids were taken from me, I couldn't face life without them. In fact many parents lose children to accidents, illness and atrocity and only find the strength to continue because their other children need them.

    However, when it comes to letting children play outside, walk to the shops etc, we have to let them grow up one day and we can't protect them forever. IMHO it's better to help children to look after themselves sooner rather than later. If you keep them wrapped in cotton wool for too long, they won't be well prepared when they have to face the real world alone. And that day will come around much quicker than you think.
    It's a tough decision as to when your child is old enough to start learning to look after themselves and one which only the parents can make.

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    Re: Madeline

    Quote Originally Posted by Gav View Post
    IMHO it's better to help children to look after themselves sooner rather than later. If you keep them wrapped in cotton wool for too long, they won't be well prepared when they have to face the real world alone.
    Yes but surely there's a limit... This little girl's 3 for heavens sake and her twin siblings even younger!

    They would have to be old enough to at least be able to be equipt with some knowledge of what to do in an emergency... like being able to use a telephone to phone their parents mobile, escape from a fire exit and set a fire alarm off, contact a responsible adult, not to put their fingers into electric sockets and not to drink the water from the taps etc.

    Things can very quickly go horrible wrong and no child at the age of three could possible be responsible enough to make the right decisions under unfamiliar circumstances!

    So why take the chance
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    Re: Madeline

    Quote Originally Posted by Lory View Post
    Yes but surely there's a limit... This little girl's 3 for heavens sake and her twin siblings even younger!

    They would have to be old enough to at least be able to be equipt with some knowledge of what to do in an emergency... like being able to use a telephone to phone their parents mobile, escape from a fire exit and set a fire alarm off, contact a responsible adult, not to put their fingers into electric sockets and not to drink the water from the taps etc.

    Things can very quickly go horrible wrong and no child at the age of three could possible be responsible enough to make the right decisions under unfamiliar circumstances!

    So why take the chance
    Yes, sorry I should've been clearer. That was more directed at people who worry about letting their older children play out.

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    Re: Madeline

    It's just heartbreaking... I've just spent the night worried about my youngest because he was admitted to hospital (Daddy stayed with him, whilst I came home and looked after his big sister) - I was panic stricken because he'd had a febrile convulsion.. blaming myself for not spotting the signs earlier....

    I feel so sorry for this little girl's parents... taking aside all issues about whether she should have been left alone - they must be absolutely devastated. I was terrified for my wee boy and he was safe in a hospital.

    I do so hope that the wee soul is found okay

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    Forum Bombshell - Our Queen! Lory's Avatar
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    Re: Madeline

    Quote Originally Posted by Mezzosoprano View Post
    I was panic stricken because he'd had a febrile convulsion.. blaming myself for not spotting the signs earlier....

    I hope he makes a very speedy recovery
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    Re: Madeline

    Quote Originally Posted by bigdjiver View Post
    Nobody could, or should, watch their children 24/7. Mother love becomes smother love. We have had a recent case in the Uk where a child was abducted from her own home whilst her mother was in another room. I remember a case where a child was killed in an accident whilst tethered to her mother.

    The last thing any child needs is a neurotic parents.
    I was guilty of thread skimming, and not having been watching the news. Somehow I had the impression that the child was 12 years old when I wrote that.

    I was moving into my a new house. Amongst many other things I admired the childproof locks on the windows over a short drop to a flat roof in the front rooms. I carried on with my unpacking one of my children fell out of the back room. Thus I found out did not have childproof locks on the windows on the back. He fell from the first floor onto a concrete path. He survived, and apparently fully recovered.

    It just takes a seconds inattention.

    I took my children to stay with their Grandmother, and tucked them all safely into bed. I went to check a short while later and found that my youngest had turned on the gasfire, and the unlit pilot supply was pumping gas into their room. I could easily have decided that they were all sleeping peacefuly, and it was better not to disturb them.

    I set our front room on fire at the age of 5 with my two sisters and I in it. I had watched where my mother hid the matches, and wanted to see how they worked, and dropped one when it did. Luckily my mother was in the kitchen. Being a parent is the best job and the worst job.

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    Re: Madeline

    Quote Originally Posted by Double Trouble View Post
    No. From what I understand, the resort that they were staying at have a group of 'nanny's' that patrol the holiday camp listening out for crying children & presumably intruders. If they heard anything they would radio to the Restaurant to let the parents know.
    I am actually living in the block where this tragic event has taken place.
    DT I must just correct you on your thread.It is not part of a holiday camp,they are in fact staying in an apartement block of about 15 residences that are rented out by their owners.The blocks are part of a series of blocks and apartements that are run by Mark Warner.
    As far as I am aware there are no Nannys patroling at night.(if there were why the need to check up every 15 minutes)

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    Re: Madeline

    Quote Originally Posted by djtrev View Post
    I am actually living in the block where this tragic event has taken place.
    Oh God, whats the latest?


    Quote Originally Posted by djtrev View Post
    DT I must just correct you on your thread.It is not part of a holiday camp,they are in fact staying in an apartement block of about 15 residences that are rented out by their owners.The blocks are part of a series of blocks and apartements that are run by Mark Warner.
    As far as I am aware there are no Nannys patroling at night.(if there were why the need to check up every 15 minutes)
    Yes you are right. Having watched more news footage last night, it would seem there are no nanny's or CCTV camera's...nothing.

    Still hopeful of a happy ending, but it's not looking good is it?

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