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Thread: Why do you ask?

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    Registered User Mythical's Avatar
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    Why do you ask?

    So, partly following on from this thread, and partly becuase I got more dances out of pity on Sunday than out of smilng and people knowing me at my regular lesson, (three to nil!) Guys, what, if anything makes you ask a lady to dance? And what makes you decide not to?

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    Commercial Operator StokeBloke's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mythical View Post
    Guys, what, if anything makes you ask a lady to dance?
    There are a bazillion reasons why I ask to ask anyone to dance - ladies or men. I do love to have a challenge. That means I will ask a newbie-death-grip-bouncy-stagger-round-in-a-circle type dancer, or a champion and anyone in between.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mythical View Post
    And what makes you decide not to?
    If I am new to a venue I will tend to be a bit shy about asking people to dance. The main reason I don't ask people is if I have danced with them in the intermediate lesson and they were appauling to dance with. One of the bonuses of doing the lesson. Also if they hide away in the corner I tend to leave them alone too, in case they are hiding away for a reason. Although that won't stop me if they are very pretty [TB's not reading this is she shhh]

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    The Gobby one! WittyBird's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mythical View Post
    I got more dances out of pity on Sunday than out of smilng and people knowing me
    I wouldn't worry about it, I didn't even get pity dances on Sunday

    Ooooh this is gonna be a fun thread, think I will grab some popcorn and wait for the party to start....... cos this has never been discussed before

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    The Gobby one! WittyBird's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mythical View Post
    Guys, what, if anything makes you ask a lady to dance? And what makes you decide not to?
    Only just twigged on this....
    Why weren't you doing the asking?

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    Registered User Jhutch's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Oooh, chance for another poll?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mythical View Post
    I got more dances out of pity on Sunday
    Don't be so hard on yourself - most people know what it was like to have just started out and will want to encourage you - i think that seeing it purely as 'pity' is a bit harsh. After all, it is supposed to be a social thing rather than a competition!

    I don't really have a set system for asking people. In terms of the other two things you mention then i do tend to ask people i know. Smiling is less of an issue for me though - i may be more likely to ask someone who is not smiling actually as they may be having a bit of a bad night or be a beginner feeling a bit nervous. At the end of the day, it often tends to be whoever is unfortunate enough to be standing near me at the time that i haven't already danced with during that evening. I don't ask women twice unless i really do know them fairly well. One group i don't really ask are the women who are really good as i just feel that my repitition of first moves and yo-yos might be a bit below them Women who i have bad dances with in the past i will ask again quite happily - as we all know it is always the man's fault so it makes me wonder if i could lead them better next time.

    I don't really match women to songs yet - have probably only asked on this basis two or three times.

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    Commercial Operator angelique's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Pass the popcorn Witty, am gonna sit back and watch with interest, cos it's you and me both girl, that don't get asked to dance!

    Who knows, I may even do the robotic routine for good measure if you dare to ask me

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    The Gobby one! WittyBird's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by angelique View Post
    Pass the popcorn Witty, am gonna sit back and watch with interest, cos it's you and me both girl, that don't get asked to dance!
    I've concluded that it's because all the other women need more practice than us Well that's my story anyway

    Quote Originally Posted by angelique View Post
    Who knows, I may even do the robotic routine for good measure if you dare to ask me
    Yeah baby, I can't wait.
    I wish I'd filmed it now

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    Registered User Mythical's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by WittyBird View Post
    Only just twigged on this....
    Why weren't you doing the asking?
    Today i was. Lots and lots of it. Most guys were nice enough to say yes, so I did get to dance plenty.

    On Sunday, everyone was so good, I was scared to ask to start with - then the first guy i asked refused, and all the confidence I'd built up ran away and hid.

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    The Gobby one! WittyBird's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mythical View Post

    On Sunday, everyone was so good, I was scared to ask to start with - then the first guy i asked refused, and all the confidence I'd built up ran away and hid.
    Where were you sat cos I was there on Sunday and I didnt dance much either

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    Commercial Operator angelique's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by WittyBird View Post
    Yeah baby, I can't wait.
    I wish I'd filmed it now


    U mean u didn't ??
    I have been keeping a sharp eye on Youtube in case you bu**ers had posted it on there!

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    The Gobby one! WittyBird's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by angelique View Post


    U mean u didn't ??
    I have been keeping a sharp eye on Youtube in case you bu**ers had posted it on there!
    Believe me I'd pay good money for that, unfortunately it was a spur of the moment thing and I didn't have my camera, just thinking about it makes me wanna pee my pants

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    Registered User Mythical's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by WittyBird View Post
    Where were you sat cos I was there on Sunday and I didnt dance much either
    In the corner behind you

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    The Gobby one! WittyBird's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mythical View Post
    In the corner behind you
    Well why didn't you say hello? You could obviously see I WASNT dancing that much so why not chat?

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    Registered User Mythical's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by WittyBird View Post
    Well why didn't you say hello? You could obviously see I WASNT dancing that much so why not chat?
    Because I didn't know who you were until fletch pointed everyone out in pictures for me.

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    Commercial Operator angelique's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Where was all this non-dancing going on?

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    The Gobby one! WittyBird's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mythical View Post
    Because I didn't know who you were until fletch pointed everyone out in pictures for me.
    Yeah, whatever, righto

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    The Gobby one! WittyBird's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by angelique View Post
    Where was all this non-dancing going on?
    It was at Bromsgrove Tdance on Sunday I find it highly amusing that people have no idea who I am, but then again there are hardly any pictures posted of me all over the forum and Fletch didnt advertise the fact that I would be there so it's no wonder really.

    I'm now officially bored. Even more so than I was on *** *** **** * * ** **. so

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    Commercial Operator StokeBloke's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mythical View Post
    On Sunday, everyone was so good, I was scared to ask to start with - then the first guy i asked refused, and all the confidence I'd built up ran away and hid.
    See, you should have hung on until I got there and there was someone who wasn't so good to dance with.

    I did dance with you though Witty, thanks for the dances you always make me look good on the floor (even in my Witty hat)

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    The Gobby one! WittyBird's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by StokeBloke View Post
    See, you should have hung on until I got there and there was someone who wasn't so good to dance with.
    She was there when you were there

    Quote Originally Posted by StokeBloke View Post
    I did dance with you though Witty, thanks for the dances you always make me look good on the floor (even in my Witty hat)
    You really cheered me up bringing that 'SFH' out. It was lovely to see both of you again on Sunday and I really enjoy dancing with you.

    Believe you me you were one of the best dances I'd had that day

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    Registered User Ghost's Avatar
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    Re: Why do you ask?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mythical View Post
    So, partly following on from this thread, and partly becuase I got more dances out of pity on Sunday than out of smilng and people knowing me at my regular lesson, (three to nil!) Guys, what, if anything makes you ask a lady to dance? And what makes you decide not to?
    "Be not forgetful to entertain strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares." -
    -- Hebrews 13:2, The Bible

    Reasons to ask
    - they're near
    - I know them
    - they're cute
    - they're practically dancing already
    - I haven't danced with them yet
    - their friend just asked me to dance with them
    - so the guy who's about to ask them will hopefully ask the person next to them who really wants to dance with them
    - I won't see them again for a while
    - I associate the song with them
    - they look happy
    - they look sad (and I think I've got a decent shot at cheering them up)
    - no-one's asking them (for some bizarre reason this often means they're a REALLY good dancer )
    - they're chronologically gifted (again tends to have a fair amount of experience)
    - they know Jango
    - I've mistaken them for someone I know

    Reasons not to ask
    - someone will get hurt
    - it's a fast song, they like to dance slow and I really want to dance fast
    - someone else is about to ask them who I know they really want to dance with

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