I know where you are coming from, I'm at that point in AT - I was simply floating after a few dances at Southport in June - it felt wonderful. Then I started to learn more and I've never quite achieved that 'high' again - because I'm much more self critical as I know what I should be doing. I'm sure I'll get back there again at some point.
I dance every week with leads who simply aren't there yet and the occasional visitor to NI highlights this difference in leader experience. But what keeps my regular dancing fresh for me is that those leads are starting to get there. I can enjoy their discoveries and encourage them on their journey.
I think it depends on your dance 'diet'. If you have those wonderful experiences too often they can become ordinary and you seem to need better and better dances to get that wonderful connection. I've deliberately taken a 4 month 'weekender break' where I haven't been going away. I know that by Feb I'll really have an appetite for the Southport blues room experience. I'm already getting hungry. Sometimes a break means you can rediscover things anew.
Yep, but that was MJ for me for years. And I was like that at times over the past year with AT, grabbing any opportunity I could at weekenders, frustrated if a suitable track came on and there was no-one to dance with. But I've managed to make some space for AT, getting on a tango weekend this year etc. So now I know that if a tango track comes on and there is no-one to dance AT with, that there will be other times, other nights, other dances to look forward to. So instead of getting frustrated when I can't get to dance the style I want, I think of it as a treat when I do.
I think I'm saying that it takes some work and some thought, but you can change your focus on what makes a good dance experience, reset your targets and aim to make the best of whatever dancing you are doing.
For me - There is more yet to discover. There are more heights to reach. I'm going forward.
What? Gus make a typo??
It's interesting that private lessons are so undersold in the UK. In Oz and NZ, my impression is that a lot more people take up private lessons in order to improve their dancing.
Personally, I'd say that a private lesson done well can be of far more benefit in aiding improvement than a workshop, and probably only cost slightly more for one person, or actually slightly less for two people. You can get feedback personal to you on tips to aid your dancing. And a whole hour dedicated to improving just you. Even in a 4 hour workshop limited to 10 couples, you still get much less time than that, and most of the moves/advice/instruction is given out on a general, rather than on a specific basis. You might get a few minutes here and there with the teacher, but nowhere near as much as a dedicated lesson.
When deciding on having one, I'd advise to approach a teacher who's style and expertise match the areas in which you want to improve. Asking a teacher who has a reputation for smooth blues how to dance better in a funky style, for example, is probably not going to help you much. Think about the lesson beforehand. Turning up with a general remit to turn you into a better dancer won't have as much benefit as turning up with specific things and areas of your dancing that you want to improve. If the teacher has to spend the first third of the time trying to work out what you need to work on, then that's just time wasted.
Finally, be prepared to accept the (constructive) advice. If you go along convinced that you know everything there is to know about multiple spinning (for example), and disregard out of hand any advice in that area, you're probably wasting your money. The whole reason for you being there is to be told how you need to improve. The teacher isn't there to tell you how wonderful you are! It can sometimes be a painful experience!
And also, be prepared to get worse before you get better. When you start working on areas, your dancing is likely to take a dip before the (hopefully) eventual rise, while you're thinking about things, and trying to assimilate them into what you do. Don't expect that having paid for one private lesson that you'll suddenly turn into world beaters. It still takes plenty of dedication and work!
I tried to rep you for this *wow* what wonderful thoughts and fantastic sentiments This is one of the *few* worthwhile reasons for reading now.
Don't you teach & DJ in the North West?
Just wondered
Big fish, tiny puddle.
Easy Tiger
Let go and relax.
Surely not no, really?
What is that sad price? The fact that you're so unique and special you've picked it up so quickly, but are so willing to pass it on to others?
Pray tell?
But you always seem to have the inate ability to pass that confidence on to others
You've got nothing to be critical of IMO
No, I disagree, It gives pleasure, it also gives you the opportunity to steal a few little quirks
No you can't go back, but you can go forwards. Go without expectations, relax and take each new experience as they come.
That's why it's better to learn one at a time. Relax, gain confidence and move forwards, whilst taking each new thing learnt into every new experience.
I'm really surprised at you Lory......
For one you have been (and still are) an inspiration to me. If it hadn't been for you and a few others who I respect and admire, I wouldn't be the person I am today.
You have coached, inspired, criticised, praised and welcomed me into the life that is dance. I wish I could give you some of the motivation and inspiration that you've given me in the last year or so.
If you're feeling like this God help the rest of us.
I've told you before Lory, but I've only bumped into you twice and you know how much my confidence improved over the evening. Each time we danced I got more confident and therefore better and that was down to you. Your dancing, smiling and encouraging comments gave me that extra confidence.
Except when a friend and I approached our local Ceroc franchise we were told that "we don't do private lessons".Originally Posted by dance cat
[QUOTE=dance cat;321445]I know what you mean, there's a certain fear of spoiling your enjoyment by looking at dance more seriously.
QUOTE]
I have just come out of a confidence moment.
while at Oxford this Friday, Roy said 'Fletch' we will grab a dance in a bit' my reply was, 'i'm not doing so good at the moment go easy on me'
he said 'why do you want to go professional' ?
NO
'do you want to compete'?
NO
'No, your a social dancer, just having fun, why have you started taking it so serious'?
'Fletch don't ever change'
and I think it was that I have been dancing with such good dancer. teachers, etc., that there expectations of me, are that I should be moving on faster, thus putting pressure on myself to be better, and when i'm not, feeling like a let down.
I dance to have fun, chat, make friends, laugh, dress up, and yes dance.
Back on track
will you two stop picking on Gus you know how sensitive he can be
and Witty all these comment you made to Lorry are mine to you
I love your little quriks, but you are you, i'm neaver going to be you, I need to find my own quirks...one day......untill then I will carry on flitting arount the room been Cilla Black
'hello whats your name and where do you come from' ?
It's why I don't dance MJ any more. I went to a Greenwich party night a few months ago and had a nice enough time with people I like - but no urge to go back - and at the last one I would have had a lovely escort ... it just isn't enough. So ... need to find another way into tango in the new year.
I am glad this thread came up because it is how I have felt for a while. I am not bored with "Ceroc" though.
I have a dance partner which makes all the difference for me I know that when I have had enough of dancing the "Ceroc tm" way I can go to her and dance the way we want to.
It helps me get the best of both worlds dancing with a wide variety of people and having fun but with musical expression and dancing freedom when I want it.
I do get critical though and I can see a point where that might kill it for me but I have my oasis in the desert.
This is the general problem with MJ though in that if you have no other dance experience it does take you down the road of dance mediocrity the good thing is though if you want to learn more it is a good base to start with.
Last edited by Groovemeister; 18th-December-2006 at 10:50 AM.
One of the lessons reading Lory's initial post is 'Be careful of what you wish for'.
I know exactly how you feel Lory. Speaking for myself I also feel like a beginner again. It does get better but if you keep feeding yourself with knowledge you will keep on this sort of cycle. Like they say dancing can be a drug and when you look at it you're looking for new highs to feed the addiction unfortunately.
Even this year the extra knowledge picked up has been so specialist I wonder sometimes if I should carry on or not.
Gus,
As I always, I disagree completely with your view on ranking and judging everything in life and finding it all comes up short and leaves you dissatisfied.
I would much rather
The ideal would be for 'centres of enjoyment' to exist throughout the UK.
Oooh. So much material to shoot at in such a small space.The sad truth is that outside a few clubs in the South East, despite the vacuous claims of some, such clubs don't exist ... though I'd love to be proved wrong on that.
Please provide some evidence for your rather sweeping statement.
Clive
Well, firstly a huge thank you to all of you who've responded to my initial post and to the people who've PM'd and spoken to me in person too and just in case anyone 'else' thinks i'm suicidal or about to pack it all in, I'm not, honestly!
I think we all occasionally go through little phases of wondering where we're heading and what our real goal is or should we even have one
And, I also think we all have the occasional bout of 'badnightitus' syndrome where you come home thinking, I'm getting worse, not better or when the music just doesn't seem to hit the spot or your partners (even though they might be competent) don't match 'your' idea of how you'd like to interpret the music and everything just feels 'odd'
Anyway, the good news is, I had fun last night and defintiely feel like my Mojo has a bit more life in it!
Tis true, it is different for followers
Interestingly the guy doesn't have to be good, flash or even be past the beginner phase......
I suppose what it really comes down to, is the guy's ability to make 'me' feel good about 'me' in the same way, that I'd try to encourage 'him' to feel good about 'himself'.
I don't think any that i'm learning are that unusual, although, your right, I'm definitely expecting too much from an ordinary MJ night, hoping that they'd be lots of other men, who can do 'AT', Cha cha and WCS.
I've never thought one dance was better than another but now I'm learning the different styles, when I hear music that calls out for a certain dance, at that moment, i'd rather be doing the dance i've learnt, that reflects the genre!
Also, I have to admit, the idea of a 'whole night' of AT, or a whole night of Ballroom doesn't fill me with joy either! Fussy cow, arent' I? (don't answer that!!!)
Very true.
Exactly!
You just have!
It wasn't just one sided Gav!
MODERATOR AT YOUR SERVICE
"If you're going to do something tonight, that you know you'll be sorry for in the morning, plan a lie in." Lorraine
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