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Freya
6th-October-2006, 10:26 AM
On wednesday night at my regular ceroc night I was in the mood for dancing!

Just dancing I didn't feel like being sociable, I didn't really want to learn anything (I discovered this at the start of the intermediate class). BUT When I got on the dance floor....Following and leading were both exceptionaly hard work!

It was a lot more effort although everyone I danced with I do so on a regular basis.

Talking to Friends they said that I was dancing as normal and others said that sometimes they feel the same.

I was wondering if anyone else ever had these feelings and what they did to combat them?

Caro
6th-October-2006, 10:36 AM
sometimes you go to a venue with a really good mood, you think you're going to have a great night and for one reason or another it doesn't work :confused: :sad:

It happened to me a few times, I think it's normal and can be due to many things such as the music, a disappointing dance with one of your fav dancers, or simply you having (too) high expectations.

The thing is, when it starts to go 'wrong' then it's kind of difficult to put yourself back on track... your mood changes.

don't know if I'm helping much there... :grin:
But yes I think it happens to everybody, but the good thing is that it can also happen the other way round: you go to your normal venue thinking: this is going to be just another 'average' night, and it ends up much better - again it could be for the same (opposite) reasons as above.

Just be patient honey don't worry :flower: :hug:

Princess Fi
6th-October-2006, 12:11 PM
We all have times like that sweetie, and considering how long you have been dancing for, its almost incredible that you haven't had one of these 'off days' before!

Some days you go to your venue, and you dancing is perfect! You are in the zone and can do no wrong! (Often I've found that these days coincide with having hair that behaves itself)

But then you have the days when your following sucks. You can't seem to lead at all. You may end up on the floor at least once for what seems like no good reason. You're mood plummets and you can't seem to pick it up again. Its inevitable.

It could be because you've had a bad day so far and its not worn off before dancing. You have had a run in with someone you don't particuarly like which you can't get it out of your head. You may have just started with a bad dance that you can't seem to recover from immediately. You may just not have been dancing for a while and are "out of the habit." But then again, it doesn't always have to be caused by anything.

It'll pass :flower: :hug: Its annoying waiting it out though I know. Dnacing with one of your fave partners to one of your fave songs can work wonders (espeically if you are just having a complete laugh and not taking anything really seriously). Sometimes just sitting out talking with your friends rather than dancing can help 'clear your head'. (OK I know that wasn't what you wanted to do that night, but its worked for me inthe past).

Either way its doesn't last for ever. The next time you go dancing, you'll probably find it much easier/more fun!

straycat
6th-October-2006, 12:57 PM
I was wondering if anyone else ever had these feelings and what they did to combat them?

I do still get this one, but don't seem to with MJ anymore...
Still happens from time to time with Lindy, and a lot more commonly with AT (makes sense, as I'm still very much a beginner at AT).

I think a lot has to do with familiarity, muscle memory etc - the more you practice a skill, the better you can do it when you're physically or mentally not quite on form.

You can turn evenings like this into something productive though... if you can identify any factors that might be throwing you off, or any specific things you might be getting wrong that you wouldn't normally.

An example - I collect tension in my shoulders, which will significantly affect my lead (makes it less smooth, less flexible, less subtle) - so I'm unable to get the kind of responses I'm used to from my partner. So I've learned from these off days to check the state of my shoulders (you often aren't aware of tension unless you go looking for it) - and make a conscious effort to relax them.

Sometimes a (trusted) third party might be able to help identify these things.

Overall though - as people've said - we all have ups and downs, and we need to learn to let the downs go & not beat ourselves up about them :wink:

NZ Monkey
6th-October-2006, 01:03 PM
To add another spin to it - it can also mean you're improving.

Something I've noticed when training in and teaching martial arts is that the times you feel everything is going badly, other people may see no difference or even think you're doing better than you have been.

The reason is that your awareness of what you could be doing better has increased (not just on an academic level - you can feel it now) but your body isn't following suit yet. This leads to a dissonance, which you interpret as meaning you're doing badly when really it's just that you're recognising what you should be doing better. That's the first step in making all those little points second nature. :flower:

Or you could just be having a rubbish day :devil:

Donna
6th-October-2006, 01:15 PM
don't know if I'm helping much there... :grin:
But yes I think it happens to everybody, but the good thing is that it can also happen the other way round: you go to your normal venue thinking: this is going to be just another 'average' night, and it ends up much better - again it could be for the same (opposite) reasons as above.

Just be patient honey don't worry :flower: :hug:

So, what? I should go to every venue expecting it to be just another 'average' night so I'm gauranteed to leave the venue with a big :grin: on my face? :wink: hmmmm, yeah great idea! Thanks for sharing that! :)

Alice
6th-October-2006, 03:43 PM
To add another spin to it - it can also mean you're improving.

Something I've noticed when training in and teaching martial arts is that the times you feel everything is going badly, other people may see no difference or even think you're doing better than you have been.

The reason is that your awareness of what you could be doing better has increased (not just on an academic level - you can feel it now) but your body isn't following suit yet. This leads to a dissonance, which you interpret as meaning you're doing badly when really it's just that you're recognising what you should be doing better. That's the first step in making all those little points second nature. :flower:

Or you could just be having a rubbish day :devil:
...which is exactly what I posted the other day on a different thread:whistle: :whistle:
:devil:

Blueshoes
6th-October-2006, 07:06 PM
Something I've noticed when training in and teaching martial arts is that the times you feel everything is going badly, other people may see no difference or even think you're doing better than you have been.


I had trouble thinking things didn't feel right for a couple of weeks after Southport, and one evening I danced with a good lady who I always have some fun with. The dance to me didn't seem to go well, nothing specific but it felt wrong, at the end she said to me "best dance we've ever had". I now think it was my perception that was wrong, not my dancing :)

detomo
6th-October-2006, 07:14 PM
I quite often get that, where you're up for it but it doesn't seem to be happening. All you want to do is dance, but your regulars aren't doing it for you or the music isn't quite there.:(

Then one song or one dance often changes it and the rest of the night goes great. :clap:

Gadget
6th-October-2006, 11:22 PM
:D as everyone says, I would put it down to an increase of awareness rather than anything in particular going "wrong" :flower:

The better you get, the more you know. The more you know, the more things you realise you can/could/should do.
It's like one of these fern fractals where you have several branches you are aware that you use to dance (balance, connection, moves, music...) I would say that beginners dance with this level of awareness. - these are the goals they try to acheive and improve uppon.
And then within each of these you find more sub-branches (balance: weight, posture, partner...) Improvers perhaps have this awareness.
And more sub-sub branches (balance: weight: movement, feet, timeing...) Probably about intermediate level.
And more, And more... boom.
Of course while exploring one area, you then find links to another area how everything is interconnected.

Personally I can have nights where I feel like this in the majority of my dances :( That I am not thinking quick enough to make the most of my partner or the music. That every move could have been just that bit better if my position was more acurate, if my lead was a smoother guide rather than having so much force, if my timeing was more in tun with my partner... That every move seemed to lack inspiration and was the same thing I always do in the same way. :sigh:

What do I do? Become selfish for a moment and stop trying to dance. Listen to the music and throw myself into it, trying to ignore how to do stuff properly - trying to re-capture the recklessness and ignorance I had when I started at this game :D {for this I either pick a relative beginner (not newbie) or a very good dancer who will just play up the 'fun' element}
That normally shakes me out of it :clap:

Genie
11th-October-2006, 04:21 PM
Hun, I feel like that quite often. It's time to do what Gadget says, and be selfish for a while. If the whole night is going wrong and following/leading seems like effort, find someone you know well, explain the situation and get them to do some fun, chilled out dancing with you. Someone who won't care how many mistakes you make, or how silly the dance gets... like me :p Or Trampy, or Gadget, etc. Sometimes just telling someone you're having a hard night helps.

Alice
15th-October-2006, 11:08 PM
I often find that if I'm feeling like this, the best remedy is to find someone who can make me laugh. Generally a good friend, and the laughing need not necessarily be on the dance floor (but it does help)- seems to break the mood a bit, and help you relax.

If it's because you're concentrating on a lot of stuff at once (like after a weekender or a workshop) and you're feeling frustrated and hopeless, find someone you usually enjoy dancing with and switch the concentrating part of your brain off. Easier said than done, but giving yourself permission to "just dance" for a couple of tracks allows you to revert to "normal mode"- bad habits included- and enjoy yourself. You can go back to concentrating later on:devil:

:flower:

Dallen
17th-October-2006, 07:53 PM
My every day job is that of a Postman here in Belfast, rising out of my bed at 4am, thus by the time I finish work usually between 12:30pm and 2:00pm, I am pretty tired and need to get to bed if I am to survive the rest of day, particularly on Ceroc Class night. Last Wednesday I did'nt get a good afternoon's sleep, which I think in turn affected my dancing. We had a lot of first timers last Wednesday in Belfast too, some of whom were hard work. Managed freestyle with Lynn, but just did'nt lead well enough, tried my own routine, which maybe wasn't so polished as it should have been. So tomorrow I will get a few hours kip and see if I can be a better lead with Lynn and some of the others who are good to dance with!

Lynn
17th-October-2006, 09:38 PM
Last Wednesday I did'nt get a good afternoon's sleep, which I think in turn affected my dancing. We had a lot of first timers last Wednesday in Belfast too, some of whom were hard work. Managed freestyle with Lynn, but just did'nt lead well enough, tried my own routine, which maybe wasn't so polished as it should have been. I was shattered too on Wed night so if there were problems it could have been my following as well! I didn't notice any particular problems though. :flower:
So tomorrow I will get a few hours kip and see if I can be a better lead with Lynn and some of the others who are good to dance with!See you on the dance floor tomorrow night!

Jhutch
18th-October-2006, 02:51 PM
So, what? I should go to every venue expecting it to be just another 'average' night so I'm gauranteed to leave the venue with a big :grin: on my face? :wink: hmmmm, yeah great idea! Thanks for sharing that! :)

I try to have this approach to everything:grin: :blush: I figure that if you expect things to not go very well then the worst is that you find things go as well as you thought. If things go really well then that is a bonus:waycool: When going out when i was younger i always found that the nights out that i had really been looking forward to often didn't live up to expectation. Conversely, the nights where i rather reluctantly agreed to go out often turned out to be the best ones! Likewise, with dancing, the session that i was most looking forward to turned out to be the one where i left early in the freestyle after i just didn't seem to be able to get anything right. However, some recent ones where i have felt a bit tired and lethargic at the start have ended up being the best (IMO at least!)

Lynn
19th-October-2006, 12:04 AM
See you on the dance floor tomorrow night!Hope our dances tonight weren't too much hard work David. My first dance of the evening and I had to go and remove an item of clothing - do you have this effect on all the ladies? :whistle: :wink:

LemonCake
19th-October-2006, 03:31 PM
I've just had a really mixed night after a day that was just not my day one way and another. My spinning - never great - was hopeless (except for one freak perfect double :confused: ), I trod on someone accidentally, the music was blah... (hehe, fixed that by grumbling at the DJ!). Frustratingly I met a couple of really good leads, and I was all off and just not with it at all. I hope they'll not be too put off and will actually dance with me on a better night!

I'll lend you PM - he's great for fun, silly, make-you-feel-better dancing. The funny thing is this thread caught my eye because I used to think he was 'hard work' to dance with 'cos he did lots of stuff I wasn't familiar with and I had to really concentrate through every dance with him. Just make sure you give him back by a week tomorrow cos he's got a very important flight to catch :clap: :awe: :flower:

If it helps at all I look up to your leading skills in awe and admiration and think that's how I'd like to lead when I grow up... :blush: :rolleyes: :hug:

Freya
19th-October-2006, 04:55 PM
Oh Wow! Thanx LC!

Right now to get PM to Dundee on sat night!

Funny I have never found it difficult to dance with him! in fact if I think too much then I mess everything up with him!