Ignoring my left hand behind my back problem

[stewart38]

I’m finding over the years less and less women seem to want to take the ‘offer’ of the left arm behind the back . :sad:

I sometimes wiggle it about and still no takers

What am I doing wrong ?

[Tessalicious]

Try making sure you are twisting your upper body just a little, it's possible that your hand isn't far enough round for them to see. I often have that problem because my arms are shorter than those of most guys, but I've seen a lot of men with the same problem, and a little twist can really help. This is also part of a visual lead for the lady so that even if she hasn't seen your hand she knows something different might be about to happen.

If that doesn't work, I suggest not using moves where the left hand needs to be offered behind the back.

[Twirly]

Agree entirely with what Tessa says. In the workshop I did recently (with Ms T as the fabulous demo :wink: ) some of the guys were failing to get into a position where I could actually see their hand in order to reach for it (not such a disaster as it was a fake pretzelly thingummy jig anyway - sorry, cannot remember the names of the moves). I (politely) pointed this out and they easily got into a better position.

In freestyle, I sometimes cannot see the hand behind the back because it's too dark (and flashing lights/dry ice/smoke, particularly at Clapham). The guys usually wave their fingers at me or use their eyes to look behind their back until I pick up on what they are expecting me to do - they know I haven't seen it because my eyes are not looking in the right direction to move towards it. If I've seen the hand, I'm looking at it as I move towards it. So check and see where the follower's attention is as you put your hand behind you and you'll know if she's aware - if not, you've still got time to correct it.

[stewart38]

Try making sure you are twisting your upper body just a little, it's possible that your hand isn't far enough round for them to see. I often have that problem because my arms are shorter than those of most guys, but I've seen a lot of men with the same problem, and a little twist can really help. This is also part of a visual lead for the lady so that even if she hasn't seen your hand she knows something different might be about to happen.

If that doesn't work, I suggest not using moves where the left hand needs to be offered behind the back.

That works for the Wurlitzer ? and double Wurlitzer ? I don’t know the names, With that I think its really clear you want them to take the left hand

Maybe on other moves I should make the offer more noticeable by ‘shifting’ or leaning inwards or more ‘towards’ the other person

Given I only know a few moves im not giving up those I lead with my left arm behind the back :sad:

Maybe ive just got lazy over the years.

[straycat]

I very rarely use that now - not so keen on purely visual signals if I can avoid it, so I normally use the ladyspin method for getting into pretzels, completely side-stepping the whole issue.

[DavidB]

It is a visual signal. It only works because it is so common in MJ. But like any visual signal it can be missed.

All I can suggest is making sure the lady can see the start of the arm moving round your back. Ladies do notice the man's hands when they are in front, because so many times they are offered a hand to take. If they see your hand in front of your body, and then see it moving round your back, they are far more likely to understand the signal and take it.

However if they don't see it start moving (eg you have moved your hand whilst they are spinning) they are far less likely to notice it.

[Twirly]

However if they don't see it start moving (eg you have moved your hand whilst they are spinning) they are far less likely to notice it.

I will vouch for that! :yeah: :blush:

[LMC]

As Twirly says, dark/flashing lights can make it difficult to see hands offered behind the lead's back. Baggy shirts can sometimes hide them too!

Also, be patient! - Some leads seem to expect the follower to react "immediately" i.e.

lead's hand offered behind back
follower reaches out and takes hand
follower steps forward

I always think that

lead's hand offered behind back
follower steps forward, because the lead has of course led them to do so
follower takes hand

looks nicer and it certainly feels smoother.

[Trousers]

I agree with Tess on this the signal is only worth the effort if your 'opponent' sees it - so twist man twist!!

but at the end of the day if she misses it, so what; you are in control! - make a fast decision and change the move. if you make a big song and a dance about it ok if you make a big song about it you'll wind her up and the dance will deteriorate.

Just to add insult to injury here I lead a windmill this way by offering my left behind my back (it gets the girl nicely in the armpit zone) but i don't take her hand Ha! that confuses the bejazus out of them I'll tell you! That's a Katy Baxter move from way back - but I give a little verbal warning by saying 'Windmill' but I always get the reply 'Wha..............oh ok!' as I don't wait for confirmation that they understood JFDI! If it goes wrong oh well there's another move coming along in a minute.