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stewart38
30th-May-2006, 11:51 AM
Will you be cliquey at Southport ?

According to the Southport thread 91 forumites are going to Southport , Ill recognise about 40/50 people this time ??

Ill probably spend 20% of my time dancing with forumites (if they allow me to)

What if you spent 90% of your time with the 81 people assuming there will be 1400 dancers there is that being cliquey ?

If I was non cliquey id spend 6.5% of my time 91/1400 with the forumites. Some may say that’s a good suggestion ! but its silly as you going to spend more time with your friends etc

However has the forum now become the ultimate cliquey dance group

Is the ‘sofa’ at Southport big enough this time for all the forumites and their egos

TheTramp
30th-May-2006, 11:57 AM
Define cliquey!

If that means that I'll be dancing with my friends, and people that I like to dance with, then yes.....

That won't stop me dancing with other people of course. And I wouldn't like to put any percentages on it at all....

WittyBird
30th-May-2006, 11:59 AM
*sits back with popcorn and waits for the fun to start*

DavidB
30th-May-2006, 12:00 PM
I'm so cliquey I'm not going.

El Salsero Gringo
30th-May-2006, 12:00 PM
I'm so cliquey that I'm not going.

TheTramp
30th-May-2006, 12:00 PM
I'm so cliquey I'm not going.

Ah. But can I get a dance at Kent House next Monday please?? :flower:

TheTramp
30th-May-2006, 12:01 PM
I'm so cliquey that I'm not going.

Ditto! :flower:

:whistle:

El Salsero Gringo
30th-May-2006, 12:01 PM
I'm so cliquey I'm not going.Now that's just wierd...

Lory
30th-May-2006, 12:04 PM
Will you be cliquey at Southport ?


I have to admit, I laughed out loud when I read this :rofl: but then it occurred to me, I actually think Stewart was being serious?:what:

OK Stewart, quick question.. does it count if the forumites happen to be your mates, as well as forumites?

And also, what happens if you really like forumites you've met before but hardly get to see throughout the year, cos of distance?

OK damn it, i'll admit it, I plan to be 58.01% cliquey!:blush: :wink:

Dizzy
30th-May-2006, 12:10 PM
I have to admit, I laughed out loud when I read this :rofl: but then it occurred to me, I actually think Stewart was being serious?:what:

OK Stewart, quick question.. does it count if the forumites happen to be your mates, as well as forumites?

And also, what happens if you really like forumites you've met before but hardly get to see throughout the year, cos of distance?

OK damn it, i'll admit it, I plan to be 58.01% cliquey!:blush: :wink:

:yeah:

This question seems to come up again and again but the fact is that every dancer in Southport is going to want to dance with their friends and people that they are comfortable with.

The advantage of the forum is that we all may live miles apart but we already know each other and therefore are already comfortable with each other to regard each other as friends - therefore will want to dance with one another, especially if we don't see each other very often.

I do intend to dance with strangers at Southport too and will probably have a great time doing it but I will also intend to dance with forumites who I haven't seen in a while. If that is cliquely then bring it on!!

El Salsero Gringo
30th-May-2006, 12:14 PM
"Cliquey" is not about what you do, but about how what you do makes other people feel.

So you probably need to ask everyone else at Southport - those not on the Forum - whether anyone here is going to be cliquey.

Lory
30th-May-2006, 12:16 PM
I will also intend to dance with forumites who I haven't seen in a while. If that is cliquely then bring it on!!
But what percentage Dizzy? :devil: We need numbers :D

DianaS
30th-May-2006, 12:17 PM
Hmmm
I tend to just float around start with those I know and end up with total strangers..
But then
Total strangers then become those I know

So its iterative.

Aleks
30th-May-2006, 12:22 PM
I expect that I'll be about 75% cliquey at Southport.
The other 25% will be those that I become cliquey with at SP in September...

Dance Demon
30th-May-2006, 12:27 PM
I expect that I'll be about 75% cliquey at Southport.
The other 25% will be those that I become cliquey with at SP in September...

can I be in your clique please:D

Aleks
30th-May-2006, 12:31 PM
You already are!
:hug:

Dizzy
30th-May-2006, 12:36 PM
But what percentage Dizzy? :devil: We need numbers :D

Well Lory, I don't expect to be as popular as our own Forum Bombshell :respect: :worthy: so I expect only to be 49.7% cliquey :whistle:.

Lucy Locket
30th-May-2006, 12:37 PM
I'll be in the blues room most of the time with forumites i know & hopefully getting to know those i've never met & also dancing with people i know who aren't forumites:flower:


what does that make me (keep it clean please):rofl: :rofl:

ducasi
30th-May-2006, 12:37 PM
I'm a SPV, so I really don't know what it'll be like... But I imagine that everyone who goes will be part of at least one group of folks who know each other.

E.g., most of the Scottish dancers will know each other... I guess many of the London dancers will know each other. Likewise, all around the country...

The forum transcends location, and could end up being a particularly large and cohesive group – thus more noticeable.

I intend to be very regimented in my time spent with cliques – 25% of my time with the Scottish clique, 25% of my time with the forum clique, and 25% of my time with non-Scottish, non-forum people. I will spend the remaining 25% of my time on my own, feeling lonely – please do not disturb me 'cos it will throw out my carefully balanced percentages. :)

Trousers
30th-May-2006, 12:46 PM
Now that's just wierd...
I admit I thought you were just being grammatically anal for a moment.

El Salsero Gringo
30th-May-2006, 12:50 PM
I admit I thought you were just being grammatically anal for a moment.You mean you thought that I was just being grammatically anal for a moment?

As if I would ever be so pedantic.

Lory
30th-May-2006, 12:59 PM
I expect that I'll be about 75% cliquey at Southport.
The other 25% will be those that I become cliquey with at SP in September...
:yeah: Based on the above, does that mean we're becoming 'more' or 'less' cliquey :confused:

Anyway, I have a simple solution.. lets re-name the bluesroom 'THE CLIQUE' then everyone who enters it, is 'in' it! :whistle: :rofl:

Aleks
30th-May-2006, 01:03 PM
We're probably just as cliquey as we ever were, but now have a common Forum/Blues Room clique we belong to.

Tazmanian Devil
30th-May-2006, 01:19 PM
Yep I will be Cliquey :D

I won't dance with any of ya :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

fletch
30th-May-2006, 01:21 PM
I remember going to Southport last June and walking past 'you lot' having a b-b-q and wondered who you all were and how I could get an invitation.:worthy:

I think cliques are only a problem for people on the outside wanting to get in.:what:

I never know what i'm going to do and with who:eek: so it would be impossible to guess a percentage of who i'm going to dance with this weekend,:na: after all I might get lucky and spend all weekend staring into the eye's of the man of my dreams.:awe:

WittyBird
30th-May-2006, 01:25 PM
after all I might get lucky and spend all weekend staring into the eye's of the man of my dreams.:awe:

:rofl:

Fletch will be dancing most of the weekend :innocent:

Ickle Chick'n
30th-May-2006, 01:33 PM
I always see being cliquey as how someone on the outside perceives a group, or if the group is obviously shutting people out and I don't think most of us would do that!:rolleyes:

I feel honoured to be a part of the forum group and am hoping it ups my chance of being asked/being able to ask people to dance as I feel I know a few more of you
'orrible lot since Sept!:flower:

As for percentages I'm going to be torn between forumites, Cornish bunch, Devon Bunch, those I met on previous weekenders who might not be forumites...

...brings me onto...how do we get an accurate percentage when we don't know if some of those we class as friends/knowns and think may not be on the forum, are in fact on the forum but we just didn't know?!:(

Confused ickle chick'n...:confused:

Lory
30th-May-2006, 01:35 PM
after all I might get lucky and spend all weekend staring into the eye's of the man of my dreams.:awe:
oooh, just TWO of you huh :devil: that's very cliquey :wink: :whistle:

:rofl:

Top Bird
30th-May-2006, 01:38 PM
Wherever you dance, there are "cliques" and this has been going on for years, but they are just groups of friends who congregate together in a particular spot in a venue.

I only became a forumite in April this year and am also an SPV, but I now know a fair number of other forumites and getting to know more and more everytime I go dancing or to another weekender, and I think we are, in the main, a fair minded, friendly bunch of folk. We are not unapproachable, we do not bite, and yes, we spend a large percentage of time dancing with our friends rather than strangers, but that does not necessarily mean that all these partners are forumites, in fact if you take a weekender as an example, IMHO I believe the opposite to be true.

ONLY 3 MORE SLEEPS - YIPPEEEEEEEEEE :clap: :clap:

fletch
30th-May-2006, 01:44 PM
oooh, just TWO of you huh :devil: that's very cliquey :wink: :whistle:

:rofl:
I just need to find someone to be cliquey with:wink:

:love: :love: :love:

Sheepman
30th-May-2006, 02:03 PM
lets re-name the bluesroom 'THE CLIQUE' then everyone who enters it, is 'in' it! :whistle: :rofl:
I intend to be cliquey for 4 or 5 minutes with anyone that asks me for a dance. :whistle:

But getting anal about it, if I have about 200 dances over the weekend, Say 10 to 15 dances with a few people I'm closest to. Twice a night with people I know well. Twice over the weekend with other people I always enjoy dancing with. That leaves around 10 dances to have, which could easily be with other firends I just haven't managed to catch up with yet.
So it will probably be the usual thing, around 2 a.m. on Monday morning, I'll be looking around tearing my hair, :what: saying "I must dance with someone new!!"

My main conclusion is this.
A WEEKENDER ISN'T LONG ENOUGH!

Greg

stewart38
30th-May-2006, 02:27 PM
I have to admit, I laughed out loud when I read this :rofl: but then it occurred to me, I actually think Stewart was being serious?:what:



Did you take your laugh back ??


I’m not looking to ‘moralise’ or defence cliquey ness or what ever you call it. As an insider that word isn’t nice

The thread could have been ‘do you intend to dance with your mates more then the plebs that don’t belong (no that doesn’t sound right)’

How about do you ‘intend’ to dance with your friends more then your enemies ? sounds better.

Dancing with groups of friends is fine great , even dancing with someone ‘17 times in a row can be fun, is that cliquey ??’ I don’t know I don’t care

LMC
30th-May-2006, 03:05 PM
Define cliquey!

If that means that I'll be dancing with my friends, and people that I like to dance with, then yes.....

That won't stop me dancing with other people of course. And I wouldn't like to put any percentages on it at all....
:yeah:

I'm not good enough to be cliquey, I'll dance at least once with anyone who asks. If they annoy me then I'll run and hide from them for the rest of the weekend.

LMC
30th-May-2006, 03:33 PM
Actually, scrub that last remark.

I'm going to be cliquey - I've met most of the other 90 forumites who are going and I don't fancy ANY of you. I shall be dancing with the male 50% of the other 1,309 people at SP.

WittyBird
30th-May-2006, 03:37 PM
Actually, scrub that last remark.

I'm going to be cliquey - I've met most of the other 90 forumites who are going and I don't fancy ANY of you. I shall be dancing with the male 50% of the other 1,309 people at SP.

:rofl:
Saucer of milk coming up :rolleyes:

TheTramp
30th-May-2006, 03:44 PM
Actually, scrub that last remark.

I'm going to be cliquey - I've met most of the other 90 forumites who are going and I don't fancy ANY of you. I shall be dancing with the male 50% of the other 1,309 people at SP.

No worries. I'll cross you off the list then! :whistle:

CJ
30th-May-2006, 04:02 PM
I don’t know I don’t care

So, what do you know??

stewart38
30th-May-2006, 04:52 PM
So, what do you know??

I know that if all the people in the world gave each other a hug the trains would run on time :grin:

stewart38
30th-May-2006, 04:56 PM
ONLY 3 MORE SLEEPS - YIPPEEEEEEEEEE :clap: :clap:


Two more if your hooking up with WB and Fletch on Thursday :sick:

Georgious dancer
30th-May-2006, 07:57 PM
I think cliques are only a problem for people on the outside wanting to get in.:what:



I have to agree with Fletch here. I met most of the forumites I know for the first time at storm in March. I hadn't been a forum member for long but I didn't find you at all cliquey, you all made me feel really welcome. At the end of the day it's not like we only dance with each other and say no to everyone else. I know that I always make a point of dancing with a few people that I don't know whereever I go. So if people see us as cliquey then I guess it's their problem, we shouldn't feel guilty because we know that they would be more than welcome whether they are a forum member or not (as long as they were nice of course!).

This thread has now got me to thinking whether people see us as an unapproachable group when we are at venues? It is a hard question for any of us to answer as we are already on the inside, I'd like to think that people don't see us like that but maybe they do!

Hope that makes some kinda of sense!

WittyBird
30th-May-2006, 07:59 PM
Two more if your hooking up with WB and Fletch on Thursday :sick:

Have you got the Morphine drip ready :rofl:

Minnie M
30th-May-2006, 08:01 PM
I hope to have my usual weekender drink - so I will be everyone's friend :yeah: :cheers:

Seriously, even inside the forum there are some posey forumites who are particular who they dance and associate with - thank goodness they are in the minority

drathzel
30th-May-2006, 08:24 PM
Well i will dance with the people i love to dance with, i'll dance with the people i like to dance with, i will dance with people i dont know and i will dance with anyone who asks me! I intend to dance more than in september, when people kept saying no to me :tears: (probably cuz they were being cliquey)

Minnie M
30th-May-2006, 08:54 PM
There should be a poll on who is more cliquey male or female - personally I think the men - but is that because I am female :confused:

jacksondonut
31st-May-2006, 01:33 PM
I have to agree with Fletch here. I met most of the forumites I know for the first time at storm in March. I hadn't been a forum member for long but I didn't find you at all cliquey, you all made me feel really welcome. At the end of the day it's not like we only dance with each other and say no to everyone else. I know that I always make a point of dancing with a few people that I don't know whereever I go. So if people see us as cliquey then I guess it's their problem, we shouldn't feel guilty because we know that they would be more than welcome whether they are a forum member or not (as long as they were nice of course!).

This thread has now got me to thinking whether people see us as an unapproachable group when we are at venues? It is a hard question for any of us to answer as we are already on the inside, I'd like to think that people don't see us like that but maybe they do!

Hope that makes some kinda of sense!

Yes, you make a lot of sense to me.. I found that being introduced to the group was like being introduced to a new freindly family (in some cases, much more friendly than family..!!!!:wink: :rofl: )

In the past, long before Forumness (as I know it) existed, I never really noticed what other people were doing... unless, it was someone doing something outrageous... or dancing beautifully.. I may have noticed that.
I have not really ever been too shy to ask for a dance... (well, certain people may have overawed me slightly)

The only instance I can possible compare, is that sometimes my non-Forum friends have felt excluded slightly even after being introduced... but I cant help it if they feel excluded.. as I have introduced them to the group... does that make sense..? On the whole most Forumites are dead friendly..

:cheers:

Cruella
31st-May-2006, 01:51 PM
On the whole most Forumites are dead friendly..

:cheers:
Didn't know the corpse was on the forum!

stewart38
31st-May-2006, 02:00 PM
Didn't know the corpse was on the forum! It's not like you to be tactful Fletch, name the unfriendly ones. :devil:

Is Jacksondonut ,Fletch as well ?

Im confused

Cruella
31st-May-2006, 02:05 PM
Cruella makes note to self. Never skim read. :blush:

under par
31st-May-2006, 02:57 PM
Well I have decided only to dance with
1. people who have asked me to dance or
2. those whom I've asked to dance and
3. with a few dancers who Capt Fantastic has introduced to me and pushed me onto the dancefloor with.

So I will be classed as 103.69 % cliquey.

Rebecca
31st-May-2006, 02:58 PM
Well I have decided only to dance with
3. with a few dancers who Capt Fantastic has introduced to me and pushed me onto the dancefloor with.

I'm in then - Fantastic! :clap:

under par
31st-May-2006, 03:04 PM
I'm in then - Fantastic! :clap:

Well you're the captain!!:whistle:

See you there Rebecca :hug: :cheers: :yeah:

Chef
31st-May-2006, 03:28 PM
Well I shall be dancing with Dawn (because even after all this time I still enjoy dancing with her), people who ask me to dance with them, and people who I see dancing that I think will be enjoyable to dance with. Some of the latter two groups may be forumites.

I am also planning to seek out Lynns group from Northern Ireland and dance with as many of the followers as I can find (just becaus I did it the only other time that I went to Southport and it was also her groups first "away" match). I intend to ask Rachel for a dance even though she scares me.

The above plan meant that I met and danced with Fletch and Jivecat and many other lovely dancers that I didn't get the names of the last time that I went to Southport. Dancing with nice dancers that I don't normally have the chance to dance with is a major attraction of travelling so far for a weekender.

If anything I will be dancing LESS with people where I know I will have the opportunity to dance with them when I return to home turf. In that resepct I think I will be LESS cliquey.

WittyBird
31st-May-2006, 03:31 PM
I intend to ask Rachel for a dance even though she scares me.


Why does Rachel scare you? She has got to be the least scary person I know :sad:

As well as being a complete sweetheart with more heart than anyone else I know she isn't capable of saying 'Boo' she would scare herself if she did :rofl:

Now Marc is the scary one especially when he does his 'corpse' impression :rofl:

Chef
31st-May-2006, 03:43 PM
Why does Rachel scare you? She has got to be the least scary person I know :sad:


I know she is a sweetheart but I am scared that she would find a dance with me boring in comparision to her dancing with Marc. Surely ladies have similar concerns when they dance with really good leaders, don't they. I think it is called "performance anxiety". It is often said that if it all goes wrong then it is the leaders fault. I don't get the opportunity often, and the nerve even less often, to dance with followers of this calibre and so the pressure to not screw up and keep things interesting is high. I always want to give of my best but these occasions have more self imposed pressure.

WittyBird
31st-May-2006, 03:48 PM
I know she is a sweetheart but I am scared that she would find a dance with me boring in comparision to her dancing with Marc. .

Nah she wouldn't. She dances with me for goodness sake :rofl: She also dances with all the beginners at Berko :D As girls we talk (especially after wine at my place) She is always complimentary on people and treats each dance differently. So I really think you have nothing to worry about, just relax ad enjoy it :D

Anyway you scare me :eek:


BOO

Lynn
31st-May-2006, 04:10 PM
Firstly - this is a public forum, open to anyone - its not invitation only, anyone (who has internet access of course) can join and post and therefore get to know people on here. Its an opportunity to make new dancing associates and weekenders are the opportunity to meet and dance together. Its available to whoever so therefore it can't be 'cliquey'.


I am also planning to seek out Lynns group from Northern Ireland and dance with as many of the followers as I can find (just becaus I did it the only other time that I went to Southport and it was also her groups first "away" match). Thanks. :hug: Not as many of us ladies this time from NI (but more guys!) cos they didn't book in time! But those of us there are would love a dance!

Georgious dancer
31st-May-2006, 04:50 PM
Nah she wouldn't. She dances with me for goodness sake :rofl: She also dances with all the beginners at Berko :D As girls we talk (especially after wine at my place) She is always complimentary on people and treats each dance differently. So I really think you have nothing to worry about, just relax ad enjoy it :D


Yeah, don't be scared of Rachel, she is a one of the most warm-hearted and unassuming people I have ever met. :hug:

Lynn
31st-May-2006, 05:04 PM
Yeah, don't be scared of Rachel, she is a one of the most warm-hearted and unassuming people I have ever met. :hug::yeah: times a lot.


You can't possibly mix with everyone on a weekender. And even if you wanted to spend all your time with a few close friends, if that's how you enjoy your weekend then that's up to you.

I'm looking forward to watching the NI ones enjoy themselves, to seeing familiar faces from the forum and past weekenders, to meeting new people. To dancing with lots of people from the familiar and comfortable, to the challenging and exciting. Old friends, new friends and people I've yet to meet. Bring it on!

WittyBird
31st-May-2006, 05:08 PM
Yeah, don't be scared of Rachel, she is a one of the most warm-hearted and unassuming people I have ever met. :hug:

Plus she was scared of DavidJames for a while :rofl: and he's a pussycat :eek:

Minnie M
31st-May-2006, 05:22 PM
......Thanks. :hug: Not as many of us ladies this time from NI (but more guys!) cos they didn't book in time! But those of us there are would love a dance!
:yeah: :clap: :yeah:
more leads ...........:clap: excellant Lynn, I will try not to scare them too much :hug:

Looking forward to see you again :kiss: :hug: :yeah: :clap:

stewart38
31st-May-2006, 07:58 PM
I know she is a sweetheart but I am scared that she would find a dance with me boring in comparision to her dancing with Marc. Surely ladies have similar concerns when they dance with really good leaders, don't they. I think it is called "performance anxiety". It is often said that if it all goes wrong then it is the leaders fault. I don't get the opportunity often, and the nerve even less often, to dance with followers of this calibre and so the pressure to not screw up and keep things interesting is high. I always want to give of my best but these occasions have more self imposed pressure.

Have to agree with this and it nothing to do with the lovely Rachel.

Ive limted moves and im so aware of that when i dance with much better dances.

Lynn
1st-June-2006, 12:40 AM
more leads ...........:clap: excellant Lynn, I will try not to scare them too much :hug:
Almost twice as many men as women over from NI this time - we will all be on the same flight so its going to be fun all travelling together!

And we will not be at all cliquey, so anyone is welcome to join us at any time for food, cup of tea etc.:flower:

Looking forward to see you again :kiss: :hug: :yeah: :clap:Likewise! :hug: :flower: :kiss: