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View Full Version : The Sorting Hat...Please read the first post before you vote.



Zebra Woman
9th-January-2006, 08:48 PM
Not only is Zebra print up to the minute and fashionable, it is also very useful. Last night at Funky Lush I discovered that my zebra print hat and scarf had special magical powers. Yes really!

Amazingly the Zebra hat is like a modern day sorting hat. It's just like the one in the Harry Potter stories that decides whether a student is Slytherin or Gyffindor.

The zebra hat, once it has been placed upon someone's head, immediately reveals whether they look gay or don't look gay.

Just to reassure myself that I was interpreting the hat's message correctly I am offering you all a poll to see whether you agree with the the hat's conclusions.


Thank you

You may now vote....

Oh and please feel free to suggest captions or screen names

ZW

Cruella
9th-January-2006, 08:51 PM
Definately 2 gay and 2 not gay. Although they all look quite sweet.:wink:

We've got
1. I'm doing this just to please you!
2. Aren't i gorgeous look!
3. The cat in the hat look!
4. The Pretty One!

jacksondonut
9th-January-2006, 08:58 PM
Laughed my socks off... think I recognise 3 out of the 4, but methinks the hat looks better on a girly!!! Its definately very feminine....:rofl:

mmm... guess it could grow on you, after a while though.. :whistle:

:cheers:

WittyBird
9th-January-2006, 08:59 PM
That has cheered me up no end :rofl:
Spicey what are you telling us? :rofl:

Cruella
9th-January-2006, 09:06 PM
Alison, i'm so glad i bought you that hat. I didn't realise it had magical powers, it was a bargain!!:rofl:

Rebecca
9th-January-2006, 09:57 PM
:eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :what: Should I know something????

V.FUNNY :rofl: :rofl:

Jazz_Shoes (Ash)
9th-January-2006, 11:12 PM
I'm too sexy for my... :rofl: :waycool:
Oh look I can weirdly raise my eyebrow oooh
What’s that over there? :eek:
Butter wouldn’t melt… :whistle:
But, really, what is UP looking at? :confused:

ChrisA
10th-January-2006, 01:16 AM
Actually, I think the ZSH (Zebra Sorting Hat) is even cleverer than you imagined.

I was careful to look and vote before seeing the results, and there was only one I thought a bit marginal. And look at the voting!!

So the hat can distinguish accurately between staggeringly gay, staggeringly not gay, definitely gay, and maybe a bit gay, on an unusually gay day.

Wow... :eek:

:rofl:

robd
10th-January-2006, 10:04 AM
Under Par looks like a Zebra that has just seen the lions approaching :what:

drathzel
10th-January-2006, 11:09 AM
:rofl: you brightened up my morning

under par
10th-January-2006, 02:19 PM
Either I am very confused or one of you is!!!

As of now 33 voters cast their votes.

I have 7 for gay and 27 not gay(total 34) ... so one of you must think I am both.:confused:

Nice photo Silver Fox:kiss:

I am glad to be the least gay at the moment!:rofl:

Feelingpink
10th-January-2006, 07:41 PM
Fabulous! Now I know who Captain Fantastic is!

I didn't think any of the guys look gay, but SF and SnE do look like Oscar Wilde characters .... just that SF is a foppish man and SnE is called something like Trudy Huntingdon-Smith-Fitzwallah

thewacko
10th-January-2006, 10:07 PM
Oh and please feel free to suggest captions or screen names

ZW

1. well bu**er my bu**ocks
2. well bu**ered bu**ocks
3. sod off you p**f
4. again again again
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

thewacko
10th-January-2006, 10:08 PM
:blush: any ideas where I can buy a zebra hat luvvy:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Sheepman
11th-January-2006, 03:00 PM
1. "Be afraid, revenge is best served up cold."
2. "What would be your pleasure madam?"
3. "Ello, ello, ello, what's going on 'ere then?"
4. "Get your hat on my luv, you've pulled..."

fletch
12th-January-2006, 09:32 AM
I am glad to be the least gay at the moment!:rofl:

Under par, you amongst friends, if there is anything you feel you need to tell us you secret will be safe with us, the closet door isn't locked

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Nice photo

:D

Zebra Woman
12th-January-2006, 04:21 PM
Thank you all for voting. :flower:

Did anyone else have trouble recognising Under Par when his picture was head and shoulders only, and level with the other guys? That looked so wierd.

Amazingly, it seems that the ZSH seems to have said the same thing to you as it said to me. Although strangely, according to your votes SilverFox seems to be getting more gay as time passes. :sick:

Anyway ChrisA's post was rather spookily accurate.



Actually, I think the ZSH (Zebra Sorting Hat) is even cleverer than you imagined.

I was careful to look and vote before seeing the results, and there was only one I thought a bit marginal. And look at the voting!!

So the hat can distinguish accurately between staggeringly gay, staggeringly not gay, definitely gay, and maybe a bit gay, on an unusually gay day.

Wow... :eek:

:rofl:

The ZSH can indeed detect degrees of gay-ness. ChrisA was the closest to what the ZSH said on day of testing:

Captain Fantastic - Maybe a bit gay on an unusually gay Day
Spice 'n' Easy - Staggeringly gay
SilverFox - Definitely gay (becoming more staggeringly gay by the day - keep voting everyone :devil: )
Under Par - Staggeringly not Gay (more like a football supporter on a cold day)

Your prize Chris, is a free ZSH test at a venue of your choice.

Now, would anyone else like to be 'sorted'?



ZW:flower:

Sparkles
12th-January-2006, 04:46 PM
I think S'n'E looks very "pretty" :blush:

LMC
12th-January-2006, 08:10 PM
1. I think I might regret this...
2. Do you think the stripes bring out my eyes? (cute dimple too)
3. Since I'm limited to picking on people my own size I'll humour the mad woman
4. My hat and scarf now (sings) I feel prrritty, oh so pretty....

Zebra Woman
14th-January-2006, 02:57 PM
Are you unsure about your sexuality or if you're undecided about what to vote for on The Harrow Launch Thread (http://www.cerocscotland.com/forum/showthread.php?t=7455)?

Then I have good news for you! The ZSH will be available for 'sorting' at Hammersmith tonight. Come and see me for an instant answer.

ZW

Cruella
15th-January-2006, 02:28 AM
Are you unsure about your sexuality or if you're undecided about what to vote for on The Harrow Launch Thread (http://www.cerocscotland.com/forum/showthread.php?t=7455)?

Then I have good news for you! The ZSH will be available for 'sorting' at Hammersmith tonight. Come and see me for an instant answer.

ZW
There is a flaw with this ZSH.:eek: It seems to only work on men! I demand that it is tried on girls too.
There is a chance that Stewart 38 or Franco may find a piece of legislation from somewhere if we don't rectify this gender imbalance immediately!!

David Bailey
15th-January-2006, 10:49 AM
There is a chance that Stewart 38 or Franco may find a piece of legislation from somewhere if we don't rectify this gender imbalance immediately!!
:rofl:
Nahh...
Stewart would demand that women pay more for testing.

Franco would declare the whole hat scene illegal unless it was done at Camber / Bognor, and encourage everyone to sue ZW if they didn't get an equal chance to be tested. :devil:

CeeCee
21st-January-2006, 11:12 PM
Originally posted by Feelingpink
I didn't think any of the guys look gay, but SF and SnE do look like Oscar Wilde characters .... just that SF is a foppish man and SnE is called something like Trudy Huntingdon-Smith-Fitzwallah
Ah yes you may be right but I may have a story to tell which helps with the sorting.

Originally posted by Sparkles
I think S'n'E looks very "pretty"
It seems others agree…

On Friday night at Bognor I had a absolutely fantastic dance with Riaz, as soon as we’d finished, a guy asked me to dance immediately and spent the entire record asking about Riaz.

So many questions, he admired his looks, his dancing, his style, his clothes, he wanted to know his name, where he dances, where I know him from, who his friends are…

Sorry Riaz, I’d been meaning to tell you all weekend but got distracted, anyway I’ve been told by a reliable source Silver Fox that you’d be happy to hear about it on the Forum! Don’t shoot me, I’m just the messenger!

Spice 'n' Easy
22nd-January-2006, 12:54 AM
So many questions, he admired his looks, his dancing, his style, his clothes, he wanted to know his name, where he dances, where I know him from, who his friends are…

:waycool:

WittyBird
22nd-January-2006, 01:10 AM
Sorry Riaz, I’d been meaning to tell you all weekend but got distracted, anyway I’ve been told by a reliable source Silver Fox that you’d be happy to hear about it on the Forum! Don’t shoot me, I’m just the messenger!

Get yer coat yer pulled :rofl: bet he was a minger :yum:

Feelingpink
22nd-January-2006, 10:47 AM
Ah yes you may be right but I may have a story to tell which helps with the sorting.

It seems others agree…

On Friday night at Bognor I had a absolutely fantastic dance with Riaz, as soon as we’d finished, a guy asked me to dance immediately and spent the entire record asking about Riaz.

So many questions, he admired his looks, his dancing, his style, his clothes, he wanted to know his name, where he dances, where I know him from, who his friends are…

Sorry Riaz, I’d been meaning to tell you all weekend but got distracted, anyway I’ve been told by a reliable source Silver Fox that you’d be happy to hear about it on the Forum! Don’t shoot me, I’m just the messenger!I hope you were also able to furnish him with the information of how attractive and lovely his girlfriend is as well?

ZW - when is round two of the sorting hat?

Zebra Woman
22nd-January-2006, 12:42 PM
I hope you were also able to furnish him with the information of how attractive and lovely his girlfriend is as well?

ZW - when is round two of the sorting hat?

Round two is in progress...I have some in the can :wink: and some more on the way at Monday Lush, and the Harrow Launch Party this Thursday :clap: .

Watch this space. :devil:

On the subject of equal opportunities....

I am happy to test women with the ZSH, but I'm not sure what message the hat would give. :confused:

Just in case ZSH doesn't work quite so magically on women I am considering a new concept in zebra print clothing for testing females. I am undecided on the clothing and/or the question at the moment...feel free to make your own suggestions...


ZW

Zebra Woman
12th-March-2006, 06:57 PM
Round two is in progress...I have some in the can :wink: and some more on the way at Monday Lush, and the Harrow Launch Party this Thursday :clap: .

Watch this space. :devil:

On the subject of equal opportunities....

I am happy to test women with the ZSH, but I'm not sure what message the hat would give. :confused:

Just in case ZSH doesn't work quite so magically on women I am considering a new concept in zebra print clothing for testing females. I am undecided on the clothing and/or the question at the moment...feel free to make your own suggestions...


ZW

Prepare yourselves...There are more Zebra Sorting Hat pictures on their way for you to judge.

Don't watch this space though...

They will be in a fresh new thread

ZW

under par
12th-March-2006, 07:19 PM
Prepare yourselves...There are more Zebra Sorting Hat pictures on their way for you to judge.

Don't watch this space though...

They will be in a fresh new thread

ZW


ZW so pleased there will be a new thread so I will not be the subject to any more gay rumuours and ridicule.:D


Great thread though!:hug:

Paulthetrainer
8th-December-2006, 01:53 AM
The only one I thought was gay was number 3.

Looks like my 'Gaydar' needs resetting.

Lee Bartholomew
10th-December-2006, 09:42 AM
The only one I thought was gay was number 3.

Looks like my 'Gaydar' needs resetting.

Will have to get you to come down to Gaystings and join in the Monthly party called Queer on the Pier!!!!