Rent a ... German

[El Salsero Gringo]

With the recent success of www.rentagerman.de which was written up in today's Times (I know you Forum people are all Grauniad reading leftie-liberal types, but I'm feeling bold tonight and I'm prepared to admit to reading a Murdoch comic) perhaps anyone who thinks they have a sense of humour can suggest what *they* would like to see the subject of a rental service?

[Purple Sparkler]

How about 'rent a sense of rhythm' for some of the intermediates who really aren't? (I don't want to be mean, but seriously- there's a couple of guys I know who've been dancing for months but moved out of beginners way too fast).

Also, in the mood I'm in:

'rent an ability to talk to men'

'rent a concentration span' (a nurse sets you up with intravenous guarana)

[Dance Demon]

How about .."Rent A Hotshot"...for those trips to London....and you fancy going to one of the venues where the "Elite " won't normally dance with you. Each Hotshot comes completely kitted out with Black & White shoes and a black " I don't dance with begginers or strangers" T shirt....... :devil:

[David Bailey]

begginers
I like that word! A begging beginner, presumably? :whistle:

[Dance Demon]

Tsk :rolleyes: ..damn typos.... :rofl:

[David Bailey]

Tsk :rolleyes: ..damn typos.... :rofl:
No, seriously, I like it. Let's add it to the next FAQ update, along with HarperLink :)

[Clive Long]

<< cut >>

Also, in the mood I'm in:

'rent an ability to talk to men'
<< cut >>

Sorry? Not complicated.

Repeat after me: "Football, beer, Phwoar look at the **** on that" repeat, repeat ....

The wrong way, "Does my bum look big in this? Which top do you prefer? Should I lose weight? Remember that lovely holiday in Ibiza? Stop looking at that blonde! How do you feel? Do you love me? So how many guests on you side of the church?" etc. etc.

My, my that feels better getting all that stuff out

[drathzel]

A German reporting for duty..... how can i be of assistance :devil:

[Lou]

With the recent success of www.rentagerman.de which was written up in today's Times (I know you Forum people are all Grauniad reading leftie-liberal types, but I'm feeling bold tonight and I'm prepared to admit to reading a Murdoch comic)

:D Ooooh... I saw it several months ago when it was written up in Popbitch.

[Stuart]

Sorry? Not complicated.

Repeat after me: "Football, beer, Phwoar look at the **** on that" repeat, repeat ....

The wrong way, "Does my bum look big in this? Which top do you prefer? Should I lose weight? Remember that lovely holiday in Ibiza? Stop looking at that blonde! How do you feel? Do you love me? So how many guests on you side of the church?" etc. etc.

My, my that feels better getting all that stuff out

You forgot the "what are you thinking?"!

[Purple Sparkler]

Sorry? Not complicated.

Repeat after me: "Football, beer, Phwoar look at the **** on that" repeat, repeat ....

The wrong way, "Does my bum look big in this? Which top do you prefer? Should I lose weight? Remember that lovely holiday in Ibiza? Stop looking at that blonde! How do you feel? Do you love me? So how many guests on you side of the church?" etc. etc.

My, my that feels better getting all that stuff out

I must just say I've NEVER used any of the wrong ones.
I am very careful to try on clothes before I buy them and spend a lot of time checking every angle in the mirror. And since I generally wear dark jeans I know my bum doesn't look big in this.

I don't care what top anyone else prefers- I will wear what I damn well please, thank you very much.

I do lots of exercise and eat properly so weight-loss isn't an issue (I'm happy with my size 14) because I'm healthy.

This may be controversial, but I wouldn't go on holiday to Ibiza if you paid me.

If they're looking at a blonde then they're clearly not going to be interested in me so I'd rather just be friends and I'm not going to tell them to stop checking out someone attractive.

They'll tell me how they feel if they want to. If they're really obviously unhappy I might ask if they're OK as an opening, but otherwise how they feel is their own affair.

I'd never demand to be told that a boyfriend loved me. And it would be an entirely appropriate thing to ask someone who WASN'T my boyfriend. Again, he can say it if he means it and wants to but I'm not going to force him.

I might ask the last one if I was actually planning a wedding- or talking to someone's fiance. But thus far, never said it.

But I don't talk about football because I'd rather talk about Ceroc. Happy to talk about beer. Though I think perhaps shamelessly ogling other men in the midst of a conversation would NOT be the best way to pull...

[Clive Long]

<< snip >>
Though I think perhaps shamelessly ogling other men in the midst of a conversation would NOT be the best way to pull...

I was told once that a good skill to cultivate is to be able to yawn with your mouth closed. If you can also inconspicuously check out the tasty guys if the one you picked out of the raffle isn't sparkling, you have all your options covered.


I wouldn't go on holiday to Ibiza if you paid me...
Go, go. It's a great place. Much reviled, much misunderstood. Some lovely bits - although I have less than happy memories ....

Clive

[Lory]

This may be controversial, but I wouldn't go on holiday to Ibiza if you paid me.


I'd have been agreeing with you until I was 'forced' to go last year, for my sisters Hen weekend!

I admit, we went just before the 'season' started, so it was fairly quiet but I found it refreshingly clean and sophisticated, with some absolutely fantastic restaurants :waycool: and amazingly, I saw NONE of the nightmare behaviour they portray on the TV!

Yes, if you LOOK for it, it's probably there, in very small and contained areas but if you think the whole of Ibiza is like that, your very much mistaken. That's just like tarring the whole of London with the same brush as Soho or Brixton.

I'd definitely go back AND feel happy to take my kids or parents! :nice:

Back on topic... I'd like to rent a helicopter, to take me and the girls to Southport tomorrow! :na:

[Minnie M]

Back on topic... I'd like to rent a helicopter, to take me and the girls to Southport tomorrow! :na:
:yeah: :clap: :yeah: could you hang on for a little mouse from Brighton please :flower: