Chris
24th-October-2003, 03:56 AM
One online 'dance manual' has said: "It is helpful to think of the Latin Dances as being sexual pantomimes. Even though the man leads the whole dance, the idea is that the man is trying to seduce the lady, he is pushing forward and she is pushing him away. So maintain a slight forward pressure with your body."
This gives a useful technique (the forward pressure - one that's used a lot in tango) but also brings in the idea of dramatising, and confronts a much talked about issue head on. So is it valid?
Note that it says pantomimes - not for real (some great examples of the difference in Fred Astaire's Easter Parade and the first half of Strictly Ballroom.)
It's the dramatising that makes it fun, remembering that it's play-acting (unless something else is your cup of tea). This isn't usually apparent till you've been dancing a wee bit though, but it has roots in the attraction that dancing has socially (think Desmond Morris), and probably also affects the way we view dancing with people when we start getting more into it as an art form. My guess would be that the safety and security aspect (psychologically and physically) make it an attractive avenue for women, and the opening of possibilities make it an attractive avenue for men.
Here's another survey result:
"Music and dancing touches women in a very profound and unique way. It 'Stirs the Soul' and can enable her to let the every day problems of life seem less significant and help unlock the playful and sensuous side of one's personality."
<b>Ten Qualities Women look for in a Man </b>
(On and off the dance floor):
1. Good Leader on the dance floor who stays on the music.
2. Neat, clean appearance and well groomed.
3. Confident, self assured. Direct eye contact.
4. Stable career, financial security.
5. Sense of humor, quick witted, intelligent.
6. Well mannered i.e. opens the door, introduces you to his friends, good table manners etc.
7. Physically fit, keeping weight under control.
8. Interested in what you have to say, a good listener.
9. Good in bed.
10. Nice looking.
"Of all the women surveyed, all enjoyed compliments on their appearance, dancing ability, intelligence and cooking abilities. Of course only if they do know how to cook. Women also said they knew if a man was giving insincere flattery, it is like a sixth sense women have. So men beware, only sincere flattery please!
<b>Ten Qualities Women do not like in Men:</b>
1. Men who can't lead and blame it on the woman.
2. Bad breath or body odor.
3. Cheap cologne.
4. Cocky attitude, think they are 'God's gift' to women.
5. Lewd conduct on and off the dance floor.
6. Men who wear clothing that went out of style 10-20 years ago.
7. Cheap toupees. Invest in an expensive one or just go au' natural.
8. Smokers and heavy drinkers.
9. Unemployed loser types. They can dance but don't have a job, house, or money.
10. Dumb Guys.
95 % of the women said they would put up with all the negative qualities (with exception to numbers 2, 5, and 8) if the man was a very good dancer.
(I would imagine from the wording of '7' that the survey might be a few years old as well as American - but I'm sure you could read 'comb-overs' or some such equivalent.)
<b>Ten Qualities Men Look for in a Woman</b>
(on and off the dance floor):
1. Attractive, neat and clean appearance.
2. Great personality, friendly and outgoing.
3. Happy with her career or job.
4. Healthy. Not too thin or too heavy!
5. Intelligent.
6. Likes to dance but has a life off the dance floor as well.
7. Affectionate and attentive.
8. Even tempered.
9. Likes sports or will be O.K. with you liking sports.
10. Good sense of humor.
<b>Ten Qualities Men Do Not Like In Women:</b>
1. Bad breath or body odor.
2. Cold and unaffectionate disposition.
3. Messy appearance or greatly overweight (50 pounds or more) or underweight (10 lbs or more).
4. Unemployed.
5. Too much make-up.
6. Foul language, loud and abrasive voice.
7. Hypochondriac personality.
8. Women who are critical about the way a man leads or dances.
9. Air Head type. Bad conversationalist.
10. Nagging.
"An Overwhelming 90% of the men surveyed said they found it easy to feel closer to a woman who was a good listener and appeared interested in what they had to say. Men also enjoyed being complimented about their dance ability, intelligence and appearance.
"Most men like a woman who flirts on and off the dance floor (with him of course) but did not like a woman who falsely led them on by flirting only on the dance floor and then ignoring them the rest of the time.
"60% of the men interviewed did not like Wonder Bras or stuffed bras. They prefer a woman be herself. Size did not matter.
"75% did not like long extension nails that got in the way of dancing and other close encounters.
"80% enjoyed being a more advanced dancer than their partner, they also enjoyed helping their partner learn to dance by taking lessons and workshops together."
I found the lists fun (and not to be taken too seriously - I'm sure many would disagree with some of the points) and I hope you find them fun too, but what about 'seducing the woman as pantomime' - good technique? A certain top teacher :wink: is often said to be very 'flirty' - yet many women I have spoken to describe his dance technique as "you feel like you are being hypnotised" - which reminds me very much, again, of Fred Astaire's on-camera technique.
What do you think? :D
(ps hope this post doesn't upset anyone or touch on anything too sensitive!)
:cheers:
This gives a useful technique (the forward pressure - one that's used a lot in tango) but also brings in the idea of dramatising, and confronts a much talked about issue head on. So is it valid?
Note that it says pantomimes - not for real (some great examples of the difference in Fred Astaire's Easter Parade and the first half of Strictly Ballroom.)
It's the dramatising that makes it fun, remembering that it's play-acting (unless something else is your cup of tea). This isn't usually apparent till you've been dancing a wee bit though, but it has roots in the attraction that dancing has socially (think Desmond Morris), and probably also affects the way we view dancing with people when we start getting more into it as an art form. My guess would be that the safety and security aspect (psychologically and physically) make it an attractive avenue for women, and the opening of possibilities make it an attractive avenue for men.
Here's another survey result:
"Music and dancing touches women in a very profound and unique way. It 'Stirs the Soul' and can enable her to let the every day problems of life seem less significant and help unlock the playful and sensuous side of one's personality."
<b>Ten Qualities Women look for in a Man </b>
(On and off the dance floor):
1. Good Leader on the dance floor who stays on the music.
2. Neat, clean appearance and well groomed.
3. Confident, self assured. Direct eye contact.
4. Stable career, financial security.
5. Sense of humor, quick witted, intelligent.
6. Well mannered i.e. opens the door, introduces you to his friends, good table manners etc.
7. Physically fit, keeping weight under control.
8. Interested in what you have to say, a good listener.
9. Good in bed.
10. Nice looking.
"Of all the women surveyed, all enjoyed compliments on their appearance, dancing ability, intelligence and cooking abilities. Of course only if they do know how to cook. Women also said they knew if a man was giving insincere flattery, it is like a sixth sense women have. So men beware, only sincere flattery please!
<b>Ten Qualities Women do not like in Men:</b>
1. Men who can't lead and blame it on the woman.
2. Bad breath or body odor.
3. Cheap cologne.
4. Cocky attitude, think they are 'God's gift' to women.
5. Lewd conduct on and off the dance floor.
6. Men who wear clothing that went out of style 10-20 years ago.
7. Cheap toupees. Invest in an expensive one or just go au' natural.
8. Smokers and heavy drinkers.
9. Unemployed loser types. They can dance but don't have a job, house, or money.
10. Dumb Guys.
95 % of the women said they would put up with all the negative qualities (with exception to numbers 2, 5, and 8) if the man was a very good dancer.
(I would imagine from the wording of '7' that the survey might be a few years old as well as American - but I'm sure you could read 'comb-overs' or some such equivalent.)
<b>Ten Qualities Men Look for in a Woman</b>
(on and off the dance floor):
1. Attractive, neat and clean appearance.
2. Great personality, friendly and outgoing.
3. Happy with her career or job.
4. Healthy. Not too thin or too heavy!
5. Intelligent.
6. Likes to dance but has a life off the dance floor as well.
7. Affectionate and attentive.
8. Even tempered.
9. Likes sports or will be O.K. with you liking sports.
10. Good sense of humor.
<b>Ten Qualities Men Do Not Like In Women:</b>
1. Bad breath or body odor.
2. Cold and unaffectionate disposition.
3. Messy appearance or greatly overweight (50 pounds or more) or underweight (10 lbs or more).
4. Unemployed.
5. Too much make-up.
6. Foul language, loud and abrasive voice.
7. Hypochondriac personality.
8. Women who are critical about the way a man leads or dances.
9. Air Head type. Bad conversationalist.
10. Nagging.
"An Overwhelming 90% of the men surveyed said they found it easy to feel closer to a woman who was a good listener and appeared interested in what they had to say. Men also enjoyed being complimented about their dance ability, intelligence and appearance.
"Most men like a woman who flirts on and off the dance floor (with him of course) but did not like a woman who falsely led them on by flirting only on the dance floor and then ignoring them the rest of the time.
"60% of the men interviewed did not like Wonder Bras or stuffed bras. They prefer a woman be herself. Size did not matter.
"75% did not like long extension nails that got in the way of dancing and other close encounters.
"80% enjoyed being a more advanced dancer than their partner, they also enjoyed helping their partner learn to dance by taking lessons and workshops together."
I found the lists fun (and not to be taken too seriously - I'm sure many would disagree with some of the points) and I hope you find them fun too, but what about 'seducing the woman as pantomime' - good technique? A certain top teacher :wink: is often said to be very 'flirty' - yet many women I have spoken to describe his dance technique as "you feel like you are being hypnotised" - which reminds me very much, again, of Fred Astaire's on-camera technique.
What do you think? :D
(ps hope this post doesn't upset anyone or touch on anything too sensitive!)
:cheers: