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Connie
20th-August-2007, 03:59 PM
Ok, this is totally stolen from something I saw on another message board, but it had me in stitches and I thought we could do much better...

In order to explain if folk don't get it from the title, then below is some of the posts from the thing I saw...

Zoe posted first....

Priyanka in reply:
Zoe, We are over. It's not you OR me.
It's your messed up obsession with grammar and spelling and GOATS.

Zoe:
Priyanka, you never gave me any indication you didn't like bringing the goats into our bed...
I can't believe you'd deceive me like that...
I'm glad it's over!

Mickey:
Zoe, I'm sick and tired of how hairy you are. I'm packing up everything and moving out of your trailer.
P.S. keep the goat, I never liked the way you stared at it, anyways...

Priyanka:
Mickey, I can't believe you cheated on me with Zoe and Her Pet Goat.
And you even BOUGHT HER A GOAT.
I hate you, curse you!

PS: If you're wondering how you woke up handcuffed to the car I have no idea.
If you're wondering where your clothes went, I also have no idea. Maybe the goat knows.

James:
I'm sorry . . . It's not you. . .its. . .
well . . . I can't be with someone when I can't pronounce their name
unless you lose some syllables it's over.

Beau:
James, how could you! I know about you and the aforementioned goat. I had you followed. I saw the tapes. I thought you wanted me to wear that goat skin rug cause it looked nice on me....Little did I know.

We're over.

Oh, and by the way, I'm keeping the rug.


See...easy! Anyway, I can't really break up with myself so I wait with baited breath for someone to break up with me....mind you, whoever goes first will need a damned good reason!!!! :wink:

Lee Bartholomew
20th-August-2007, 04:01 PM
Connie, it's over.

I thought I was the only one to be able to do the columbian with you but now I hear you have been step step sliding with David James. :tears:

Trouble
20th-August-2007, 04:22 PM
not trying to appear stupid here but I DONT GET IT. !!! :tears: :tears:

Connie
20th-August-2007, 04:24 PM
Trouble that's it! We're are finished. I cant possibly be involved with someone who pretends that they are unable to understand this game, just so they can avoid breaking up with Woodface. :yum:

Lee Bartholomew
20th-August-2007, 04:25 PM
Think it should be called break up with the person above you. When you post, you have to post a break up note to the last person who posted.

Trouble
20th-August-2007, 04:27 PM
Connie, it's over.

I thought I was the only one to be able to do the columbian with you but now I hear you have been step step sliding with David James. :tears:

Woodface its over. You have insisted on showing me your columbian over and over again and to be quite honest im bored with it. Andy McGregor has a much better one and he knows how to use it. He has also got new moves that you could never dream of doing. I am so over you.

Connie
20th-August-2007, 04:28 PM
......

Lee Bartholomew
20th-August-2007, 04:30 PM
Trouble

I have always known you like andy McGreggor. I know how irrisitable his constant telling the world how he can teach better than ceroc is. His spins that are wobbly than mine. I would have been able to cope with your affair if it had been with a man. It's over

Go ahead girl, you've seen his photos. Get your gums round his plumbs.

dave the scaffolder
20th-August-2007, 07:34 PM
Woodface we are over...How can you talk like that about the person i love and adore....I also have feelings for trouble.

XXX XXX DTS Dave


PS has anyone found the goat???????????????

SnowWhite
20th-August-2007, 07:42 PM
DTS - don't try pretending you don't know where the goat is... You know I know!

Anyway, we're over. You've flounced and frotted once too often for my liking...

Be gone with you

Cruella
20th-August-2007, 07:55 PM
DTS - don't try pretending you don't know where the goat is... You know I know!

Anyway, we're over. You've flounced and frotted once too often for my liking...

Be gone with you

Snow White i've just heard about the seven men you have been sleeping with! It's over for us, I'm truely upset that I couldn't be the one to make you Happy, you are always complaining about being Sleepy and Sneezy, I think you should see the Doc. I feel very Bashful at being so Dopey and not realising sooner. You've made me really Grumpy and I'm glad to be rid of you.
(Now where's that goat)

dave the scaffolder
20th-August-2007, 07:56 PM
Snow White youre breaking up with me!!!
That means i am in trouble again (she doesnt seem to mind).
And as for the goat...Well he/she just gives me the horn
Away with yourself.

XXX XXX DTS Dave

Damn its all about
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Timing

SnowWhite
20th-August-2007, 08:03 PM
Snow White i've just heard about the seven men you have been sleeping with!
(Now where's that goat)

Now look Cruella - you didn't think that 7 days in a week/7 little men was a coincidence, surely?

Anyway, who are you to talk.... Hardly worth worrying about 7 when you've had 101! all of whom are rumoured to be dogs!

I'm glad we're over. And I know where the goat is...

Cruella
20th-August-2007, 08:12 PM
Now look Cruella - you didn't think that 7 days in a week/7 little men was a coincidence, surely?

Anyway, who are you to talk.... Hardly worth worrying about 7 when you've had 101! all of whom are rumoured to be dogs!

I'm glad we're over. And I know where the goat is...

Keep up, it's 102 now! :wink:

Trouble
20th-August-2007, 08:13 PM
Now look Cruella - you didn't think that 7 days in a week/7 little men was a coincidence, surely?

Anyway, who are you to talk.... Hardly worth worrying about 7 when you've had 101! all of whom are rumoured to be dogs!

I'm glad we're over. And I know where the goat is...

Snow White your trechourous jesabelle you., I have had feelings that you may have had desires for another woman and then i find out that your cheating on me with a goat. Not only that, another woman who has slept with 102 dogs.

We are so over and Im not happy about it but could i lend the goat :D

Tartaniad
20th-August-2007, 09:10 PM
Trouble we are so over. I thought that your smile would keep me satisfied all my life but it just turns out that your smile is hiding sarcasm and deceit.

And to think it was my pet fish you liked all along. you slippy slimy woman:wink:

Green-eyed Monsta
21st-August-2007, 01:35 AM
Dear Tartaniad,

This hurts me more than it hurts you, but we have to break up.
You dance exactly like your avatar, and I can bear it no longer. :tears:

Goodbye forever.

TheTramp
21st-August-2007, 03:29 AM
Dear Green-eyed monster...

I'm sorry, but it's over between us. Your ex may have danced like his avatar, which is indeed bad enough.

But you look like yours! I can bear it no longer :tears:

Green-eyed Monsta
21st-August-2007, 04:06 AM
Dear Trampy

You can't break up with me cos I am sooooo dumping you first! :mad: You even spelt my name wrong. It's Monsta.

I knew it wasn't just your accent every time you said my name wrong! Especially the time you called me Franck. I mean that hasn't even got anywhere near as many syllables as Green-Eyed Monsta!:tears: :tears: :tears:

dave the scaffolder
22nd-August-2007, 09:35 AM
Green-eyed-monsta we are over my lovely. It was the weekend in Brighton that did it for me. We were in a trendy club sat at the bar when i asked you to push my stool in, I was limping for a fortnight and now have shares in Anusol.

Ps i am missing the Goat

XXX XXX DTS Dave

Caz
22nd-August-2007, 09:55 AM
You and that bl**dy goat..i thought you were over her :tears:

that is it DTS..

u have the goat... i hope u r happy

we are finished

dave the scaffolder
24th-August-2007, 03:23 PM
Dear Caz me and the goat are cruising in the med.
I have given up dancing so i will not come across your face anymore,, mind you i look forward to coming across jamie in the near future.

Ps can i have me sheepskin jacket back.

XXX XX DTS Dave

Trouble
24th-August-2007, 04:27 PM
Dear Caz me and the goat are cruising in the med.
I have given up dancing so i will not come across your face anymore,, mind you i look forward to coming across jamie in the near future.

Ps can i have me sheepskin jacket back.

XXX XX DTS Dave

DTS your a two timing swine. You keep on and on about that goat and you told me it was a friendship thing and all along you was tickling its fancy. I also note you have given up dancing. I will therefore come across Jamie first as i have not given up dancing and i will take that opportunity to have him on numerous occassions.

You can have my bed linen, which smells of goat, to replace your sheepskin jacket.

dave the scaffolder
24th-August-2007, 04:40 PM
DTS your a two timing swine. You keep on and on about that goat and you told me it was a friendship thing and all along you was tickling its fancy. I also note you have given up dancing. I will therefore come across Jamie first as i have not given up dancing and i will take that opportunity to have him on numerous occassions.

You can have my bed linen, which smells of goat, to replace your sheepskin jacket.
Ha how dare you You who would not even clean the flat of the man you supposed to love.

I will swap you a nice,nearly new tea cosy for my sheepskin jacket.

The goat stays with me...end of.
XXX XXX DTS Dave

Trouble
24th-August-2007, 05:13 PM
you can keep the tea cosy, the goat seems to prefer you wearing it down over your face. Cant think why :what: :sick:

dave the scaffolder
24th-August-2007, 05:18 PM
you can keep the tea cosy, the goat seems to prefer you wearing it down over your face. Cant think why :what: :sick:

Damn i am HANDSOME little wonder the goat loves me me me and only me.
XXX XXX DTS Dave

:wink::wink::wink:

FirstMove
24th-August-2007, 08:22 PM
DTS, it's over between us. When I let you bring your scaffolding into the bedroom, I was hoping for Pole dancing, not a scale replica of the Forth bridge.

You can keep the goat, but I want the fluffy sheepskin handcuffs.

Mezzosoprano
24th-August-2007, 08:58 PM
Look First Move... you're a wee green frog (note I said wee!) and the cuffs keep slipping off.... the slime in the bed is the last straw, take your little jumpy legs off to France and be someone's dinner....

we're through....

drathzel
24th-August-2007, 08:58 PM
DTS, it's over between us. When I let you bring your scaffolding into the bedroom, I was hoping for Pole dancing, not a scale replica of the Forth bridge.

You can keep the goat, but I want the fluffy sheepskin handcuffs.

FM i'm sorry i have to end this, i cant keep playing second fiddle to DTS!

BTW the goat and the handcuffs were mine!

Mezzosoprano
24th-August-2007, 09:06 PM
FM i'm sorry i have to end this, i cant keep playing second fiddle to DTS!

BTW the goat and the handcuffs were mine!

And now I find out FM was being kermit with lots of Miss PIggies... this is an insult!! I'm off.... go back down the pond you slimebucket!

drathzel
24th-August-2007, 09:10 PM
And now I find out FM was being kermit with lots of Miss PIggies... this is an insult!! I'm off.... go back down the pond you slimebucket!

MISS PIGGY!!!! I HAVE NOT PUT ON THAT MUCH WEIGHT THANK YOU VERY MUCH!:yum:

Mezzosoprano
24th-August-2007, 09:19 PM
MISS PIGGY!!!! I HAVE NOT PUT ON THAT MUCH WEIGHT THANK YOU VERY MUCH!:yum:

sorry... didn't mean it like that!!! was trying to get the Kermit thing in and Kermit loved Piggy!!

drathzel
24th-August-2007, 09:21 PM
sorry... didn't mean it like that!!! was trying to get the Kermit thing in and Kermit loved Piggy!!

mmmm explains that thing FM used to do!

NO MORE! I MEAN IT FM THATS IT WE ARE THROUGH!!:tears: :tears: :tears: :tears: :tears: