Dance jokes - anyone? Clean please!

[whitetiger1518]

Hiya,

My cousin and I are going to make a window display about dancing (all sorts of dance styles not just MJ) in September and I wondered if there were any dance related jokes kicking about the web?

It has to be clean, as the event is family orientated - but if possible they need to be understood by the land of non dancers as well.

I know that this might not be possible, or that there are maybe not that many about

But I thought I'd ask, after all If I don't ask , then there is no answer at all ;)

All pointers to webpages or individual jokes welcome

Many thanks

Whitetiger

[straycat]

Well - these are clean. (http://www.young-dancers.org/fun/jokes/jokes1.html)Not sure about the quality though.

[LMC]

How do you make a kleenex dance?

Put a little boogie in it

*gets coat*

[straycat]

Not quite dance, but still:

How do you make a duck sing jazz?

Put it in the oven 'till its bill withers.

*borrows LMC's coat*

[Spiky Steve]

I can only think of one and it's not clean. :devil:

[Lou]

What does a man with 2 left feet wear to the beach?

Flip flips.


*borrows LMC's coat from Stray*

[whitetiger1518]

Well - these are clean. (http://www.young-dancers.org/fun/jokes/jokes1.html)Not sure about the quality though.

Thank you straycat :flower: : I've just had a look at the top 5 on the page, and that will certainly make the kids laugh.

Now are there more jokes out there? I was thinking about using the differences between different styles as the basis of the joke. Puns will do to - it doesn't have to be fancy. Not sure if they exist or not ...

:confused:

[LMC]

What's a vampire's favorite dance?

The Fang Tango (the Vaults also an accepted answer)


Why are 4 legged animals bad at dancing?

They've got 2 left feet


What do cars do at the disco?

Brake dance


*retrieves coat from Lou*

[StokeBloke]

OK - Strictly it's clean but....

[ducasi]

I can only think of one and it's not clean. :devil:
:yeah:

And the punch-line is "Come Dancing!!!"

Same one?

[Spiky Steve]

:yeah:

And the punch-line is "Come Dancing!!!"

Same one?

I'd like to hear that one :wink:

No it's the 10 pence, 10 pence, 50 pence a pound joke. Funny but not allowed on this thread. :tears:

[StokeBloke]

I'd like to hear that one :wink:

No it's the 10 pence, 10 pence, 50 pence a pound joke. Funny but not allowed on this thread. :tears:
Is that the one that ends "Sod the change, pound, pound, pound, pound...?" :D

[dave the scaffolder]

Two pensioners were at a Derby and Joan dance and were getting on marvelously. The lady said to the man, listen i am a widow and havent had sex for years, lets not mess about do you fancy a bit.

The man says yes lets go back to your place.

Off they go and the man says what do you want to do?

The lady replied my husband would never do a 69, can we do that?

So off they go, teeth out slurping like good ones the pair of them.

Suddenly the man says, it was terrible the Titanic going down like that.

The lady replies what the hell made you think of that.
He says...

I was just reading about it on this piece of paper stuck to your ar*e.

Obviously needs cleaning up.

XXX XXX DTS

Hope this helps
I apolagize in advance for any offence caused.

[Spiky Steve]

Is that the one that ends "Sod the change, pound, pound, pound, pound...?" :D

Lol. Different but just as funny punchline.

But not allowed on this thread :(

[MartinHarper]

I liked this one:


Q: How many dance teachers does it take to change a light bulb?
Five!...Six!...Seven!...Eight!

Beats mine:

Q: How many chillout dancers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Five. One to change the bulb, one to stand still and hold her hand, and three to complain about the lighting.

Q: How many Lindy dancers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: 102. One to change the bulb, one to throw her up there, and a hundred to stand around clapping.